The Lion and the Badger
by alliepaula
Summary: Previously titled 'Live, Love, Laugh, COOKIES' New Characters, new twists,and new elements of Epic-ness! This story documents the romantic, intriguing & often hilarious exploits of the Hogwarts Heroes. M for language and dirty humor. Full summary inside
1. Summary

**Summary:**

**Harry Potter **is fighting his most dangerous battle yet; one within himself. With Voldemort on the rise, the death of a fellow student and the Ministry discrediting him at every turn, Harry needs to trust and rely on his friends more than ever. Can he keep his vicious temper in check, and deal with 'normal' life with all of this?

**Cedric Diggory** is still privately mourning the loss of his brother Edward, is lost in a strange new world where nothing is as it was. The pressure is coming from all sides; family, friends, and himself. Outwardly nothing has changed with him, but on the inside everything is under close scrutiny and renovation.

Enter **Elena Holland**, a small witch with a big personality. With a fierce loyalty streak, stubborn to a fault and a habit of dancing rather than walking, this is one girl that no one can ignore. Everything seems to be looking up after her arrival, until strange things begin to happen. Her presence may exude light and laughter, but soon she will discover dangerous secrets about herself and her family that will test her, change her, and maybe even kill her...

The course of true love never did run smooth, but can these teens afford to let themselves be caught up in the unpredictable emotion during such volatile times?

Hilarity, hormones and horror combine in this tale of romance between

**The Lion and The Badger**


	2. 1 First Impressions

**Chapter One**

Here are the amendments; Cedric is alive (duh), it was his brother _Edward _(ha ha, thought I'd add that in for all you Twi-hards) who was killed in the graveyard scene with Voldemort. He's also in the same year as Harry. A massive thank you to my Beta reader, **DeepCrimson91**, who is EPIC in a whole new AWESOME way .

Oh! Right, the Disclaimer! So here it is; we are on a FANFICTION site, therefore, it is obvious I own nothing that is publically recognisable as another author's ideas, writing or plot. This is my disclaimer for the entire series, because really, if I don't own anything in chapter 1, I don't think it's going to change… I'll let you know if it does though! (hopeful smile).

Here we go:

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**First Impressions**

Like all great stories the scene must be set, the characters identified, and the beginning begun. So in the interest of starting this story as a great story should be written (because hey, there's nothing wrong with aiming for greatness) let's begin.

Imagine this, if you will, your name is Elena Holland and you're fifteen. However, you're not an ordinary fifteen year old. You're a witch and a pureblooded one at that, not that you show any prejudice because of it. You're mother is Russian and your father is British, but for the some reason you were educated in France up until now, but isn't a foreign lifestyle the 'it' thing to do when your family is loaded?

Now to fill in the colours. You have rich brown hair which holds the depth of chocolate and the warmth of chestnut. It falls in a soft tumble around your face, resting just past your shoulder blades and highlights your tanned skin—the golden skin which is a result of the glorious years in the sun and warmth.

Your eyes are your most striking feature as they are like an ever changing blend of colour depending on your mood, although they are limited to the shades of grey, blue, or green.

You're creative and competitive. You play guitar and you play it well, along with writing and singing your own songs. When you're not engaging your musical side you're an expert at Quidditch and a verifiable genius in most classrooms, not that you care to boast about it. It's just who you are, and with your family history it was almost to be expected.

Your great, great, however-many-greats grandfather was the inventor of Quidditch and your father is one of the biggest producers of broomsticks, hence the family fortune. Your father's business often comes up with new broomstick models, including the Firebolt. That's a lot of greatness right there, right? But this story was meant for greatness so anything is possible.

Your father brings the cash in, but your mother is the one that transforms all those sparkling coins into the glamorous life you lead. She's a jet setter and it's her love of the world and all the luxuries in it that gave you the French education you've received. She's a stunner, with a delicate bone structure that you inherited as well—the perfect ballerina body, which was ideal since she used to be in the Russian ballet. An original Prima Ballerina, who still insists on the importance of grace and good posture. In a way the broomstick riding, guitar playing, girl you turned out to be wasn't quite the daughter she had in mind. But she'd never say such a thing, because you're her little Elena – the one thing she could never replace, and the most precious thing in her life.

Now you've taken a step into Elena's shoes, let's get this show on the road...

"I'm going WHERE?" I choked. This was NOT happening, I had friends here; I had a LIFE here!

My parents shared a look and my mum gave a tiny grimace; dad looked a little guilty.

"Hogwarts. You're going to Hogwarts Darling," only with mum's accent, it sounded more like daaahr-link . "Isn't that exciting?"

"No, it is most definitely NOT exciting! It's infuriating! And depressing, and just plain frustrating!" I cried, pacing once in a tight circle before throwing myself face-first onto my large double bed, feeling my dainty body sink deep into the plush covers. It didn't matter that my room was huge, or that the windows that lined the southern wall reached from floor to ceiling. I felt claustrophobic and caged in, like some poor animal in a Muggle zoo.

"Oh come now Lena, you know I wouldn't just uproot us unless I knew it would be good for you. For all of us," my dad's voice was muffled through the sheets and duvet around my ears.

_Darn it! Why does he have to be so infuriatingly sensible?_

I sighed, jerking onto my back and looking at the billowing white canopy above me.

My eyes flickered over to where my dad now stood at the end of my bed, leaning against one of the sumptuously carved posts. His hazel eyes were scrunched up a bit; I knew he didn't like to see me upset. I don't know how I hadn't turned out to be a total brat, my parents could deny my nearly nothing. I knew that, really, all I would have to do was begin to cry and then I could get anything I wanted. My dad may look like the strict, no-nonsense boss in his clean cut suits and dead-centre tie, but his eyes always gave him away; they held too much humour, too much love and understanding, for me to be afraid. He raked his hand quickly through his curly brown hair; _my _hair, except his was peppered with grey, and it was thinning in some places. I felt sad whenever I noticed this; it meant that although my dad may seem beyond the realms of time and age in my mind, he was still human; and so was susceptible to human weakness. I blinked hard to will away the thoughts; right now I needed to seek out the chink in his armour so I could get out of leaving my life here.

Upon closer inspection though, there was a strong resolve in the set of his jaw. No good, his mind was made up. Unless…

My eyes swept over to my mum, who had just sat down near my opulent headboard, carefully straightening the folds in her grey knitted skirt. She avoided my gaze, knowing full well that I was about to try and get her on my side. I let out another huff of air, trying to get her attention, if only to reprimand me on my un-lady-like exhale- 'ladies do not puff out air like a steam train, Zoltoi*.'

She stared fixatedly at my dressing table; sad and guilty blue eyes glaring at the delicately crafted wooden furnishing as if it were to blame for the unhappiness that now tainted the air.

This was clearly not a battle, or even a war I was going to win.

It hurt to think that everything I'd ever known was going to be left behind as I was thrown into the unknown. It hurt so much to think about how many plans laid by my friends and I that weren't going to be realised.

And yet, I felt a little bubble of pure excitement in my chest at the prospect of this new adventure. It didn't over shadow the sadness, but it lightened it a little, and I wasn't one to dwell on negative feelings. It just didn't help me. It wouldn't help my parents either; if they knew how truly upset, no, _distraught_ I was, there would be no getting rid of them; and this was something I'd need to vent about, and that was not something I was going to do when people I loved were around.

"Fine," I pouted, sitting up and slouching deeply and deliberately. "But why did you have to wait until NOW to tell me? School starts in less than a week! That means less than a week to say goodbye, to pack, to SHOP! Dad, do you have ANY idea how cold England is? Any idea how often the sun shines? Not often, not often at all! I'm going to need a whole new wardrobe! Anti-depressants!"

There, that should convince them that they don't need to molly-coddle me too much.

"Calm down sweetheart. We thought it would be best to tell you after school finished, so you wouldn't have it hanging over you," my dad replied, his tension almost gone as he reached out to squeeze my shoulder gently.

They had a point, though Merlin knew I hated to admit it; there's no way I would have done as well as I did in exams if they had told me while I was still at school. Heck, knowing me, I would have gone around getting my friends to sign a petition!

"Come along now Leibchen**, straighten up. There is much to be done before you leave for Hogwarts…"

Mum wasn't joking. The following week was filled with manic packing and so many shopping trips that I think we'd visited every worth-while store in a hundred mile radius of my home and then some. My whole life had to be packed up and moved, and believe me I had a whole lot of life crammed into my bedroom. I lost count of how many arguments, or as Mum would say 'deesagree-ments', were had over what I could and couldn't take. In the end I had to sacrifice my Quidditch posters and trophies so that I could take my guitar and music sheets. It was a tough decision, but that's all part of growing up, right? Making tough decisions and not looking back.

At least that was what I kept telling myself as I stood on the platform of King's Cross train station.

_Breathe_, I told myself for what seemed like the thousandth time as I stood huddled in my black trench coat.

_Merlin but it was cold here!_

"Platform nine and three quarters. Wait, what?" I said to myself. This isn't possible, is it? Well, maybe the Brits are just as eccentric as Dad says they are. My cousin Sergei had gotten me here in plenty of time, but he'd only been able to drop me off as he had a meeting, though he hadn't said where.

Mum and dad were more than willing to take me, but I was still a little angry (alright, _very _angry) and frustrated about having to move, and if mum started crying I don't know what I'd do.

My owl, Silver, let out a shrill screech. She wasn't a patient creature.

"Silver, shush! Stop drawing attention!" I said softly, stroking one of her shining feathers; they reminded me of moonbeams on water.

It would be just my luck if some Muggle figured out that it was weird for a girl of fifteen to be pushing a trolley with a massive trunk, an owl and a cat in their separate cages.

Silver looked affronted, and I swore she frowned before swivelling her head round so she wouldn't have to look at me. Owls; they could be so temperamental.

"Well, at least you still like me, right Athena?" I asked my cat.

Athena looked so zoned out I think she could have been a hippy in a past life. Then she sneezed, and flicked her tail at me as she turned around, indicating that the conversation was over.

I rolled my eyes.

I'd gotten Athena when I was five, and Silver when I was ten, just about to start school. At the time I'd thought that Silver was the coolest name an owl could have, then I got older and realised it was beyond corny. I loved them both, glad of whatever enchantment kept them young and healthy for this long. Come to think of it, there must be at least ten enchantments on each of them, and strong ones seeing as Silver could fly faster and carry more than any ordinary owl, and Athena was –sometimes- more coordinated than the average cat.

I shook my head and got back to reality.

_Okay, now if I were a train going to Hogwarts, where would I be…?_

_Um… _

I was drawing a blank.

_This is ridiculous! How the hell do you hide a socking big tr- oh, hang on. I've been reading too many Muggle stories._

Maybe it's time to ask for directions. Hey! There's a policeman!

I began to make my way over but spotted someone closer. Me and my laziness, one day it would get the better of me.

"Excuse me, Miss?" I asked a kind-looking woman with two ten year old boys who were attempting to run in two opposite directions as she held on to them.

"Yes, dear?"

"Could you tell me where platform nine and three quarters is?"

For a moment she looked confused, and then confusion turned into annoyance and she walked away from me. Well, actually she ran/hobbled away because one boy managed to get free, so she had to hold the other by the ear while trying to retrieve him.

"Hey! HEY!" I called after her, but she just kept on going, dragging the boy along.

"Thanks for the help," I said sarcastically to her back.

For an age I wandered around, asking people if they knew where my platform was, and then a Muggle policeman in a navy uniform came up to me and said I was disturbing the peace.

I ran away as fast as my heels could take me, for once being glad for my lack of height.

I slowed down, and then looked around again for someone wizard-like. This was going to be tricky; no doubt they were all in disguise, like me. Okay, so technically I wasn't as I dressed like a Muggle everyday because robes bugged me, but whatev- _Hey! A guy with an owl! And there's a girl with The Quibbler, I'm saved! _

I began to run towards them, when they vanished into a brick archway.

_Huh? I could've sworn… Oh! I get it! Secret passage, duh! All I have to do is walk through that wall… _

…_Walk through the wall..._

_Yep, way too many Muggle stories._

I took a deep breath, walked towards the wall and…and then I was on a crowded platform with people laughing and parents waving them off as they boarded an absolutely massive crimson train, which had _Hogwarts Express_ down the side in gold lettering.

_Halle-freaking–lujah! _

I was so busy doing a little victory jig, I didn't notice the dark haired boy in front of me, and rammed him full on.

"Oh my gosh! I'm sorry! I wasn't paying attention-"

"Get up, Neville," snapped the old woman standing over him, she seemed to have a stuffed…_vulture _adorning her hat. Ick. I hadn't seen something this ugly since Madame Vera had experimented with brocade, taffeta, ruffles, chiffon, and lace. At the same time. In puke coloured green. _I _nearly puked over the hideous dress…come to think of it, that might have hidden the ruffles…

The dark haired boy was struggling to get up, because his robes had caught under my wheel. I rolled the trolley back, and he had been pulling so hard, that he fell forwards onto the floor again.

The old woman covered her face with her hand as if in shame.

I offered my own to the unfortunate fellow.

"I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking, and then I crashed into you- is that your toad?"

The boy's head snapped around, and he dived for the toad, who was trying to make a run for it, er hop, oh wait, toads can't hop.

"Thanks," he said, scooping up the amphibian.

"It's alright, besides, I'm probably the reason you nearly lost him," I said earnestly.

"Yes, it is," said the woman with the hat that looked like it was going to fly away.

For a moment I wasn't sure of what to say.

"Um, well like I said, I'm very sorry," I said sincerely.

"And so you should be," replied the crone.

_I'm beginning to dislike her. _

It would have been interesting to see her reaction if I called her out for her rudeness, but then again, I had a train to catch. Speaking of which-

"Well I am, but if you'll excuse me, I have to get aboard," and with that, I left before she could push me. I hoped I wouldn't be as bitter as that when I was her age. I also hoped I wouldn't have wild poultry attached to my head accessories.

I hurried onto the train, and heaved my trunk onto an empty spot on a luggage rack, then set out on my next task; finding a place to plonk myself for the rest of the journey.

_Nope. No. No. Noperoonie. Uh uh. Yea- no… man! People must train to get the compartments so fast! Train, train, ha ha ha, that's kinda funny._

_Oh, wait…Aha!_

I entered the seemingly empty cabin, only to find a black haired girl squashing some poor guy into a corner. One of them seemed to be making little simpering noises. Awkwaaaard.

I left before they could notice, but now I knew to knock before entering a cabin…

A huge commotion was coming from down the corridor. My curiosity getting the better of me, I followed the sound of angry raised voices down to a compartment containing three people, there appeared to be two boys and a very pretty girl inside, while blocking the doorway was some platinum ringleader and his two mobile mountains.

"Malfoy, would you quite harassing Hermione and just bugger off?" a ginger haired boy said hotly.

"Aw, but your mud-blooded friend amuses me so, Weasley."

"Ron's right Malfoy, take your pasty face and shove off," said the other boy. This one had moon shaped glasses, dark hair and emerald green eyes that sent my pulse skittering. Hell's teeth, his face was familiar!

_Back to reality Lena._

I couldn't just let this bully terrorise these people like that! It wasn't right, and I knew first hand what it was like to be teased (there had been this girl in first year… luckily I soon figured out how to do an excellent Batbogey hex).

I strode up to the compartment, and stuck my head in to address the trio inside.

"Is this prat giving you trouble?" I asked, indicating with my thumb to the tyrant behind me.

"Who do you think-" began the white-blonde bully, when I performed one of my favourite jinxes on him; Felix Regurgitis. It made the jinxee throw up fur-balls. My best was half an hour, but my friend Alexis could do a whole week, provided they didn't go to the nurse.

"Whoops, wand slipped," I said innocently, twirling it between my fingers.

Mr McBullyPants was about to say something, when he started to gag.

"Don't worry, after a while they stop tasting like kitty litter. They taste like dog poop instead," I said sweetly, patting his shoulder. The two ogres escorted their retching leader away, and I watched them go. Good thing cousin Innokenti had started a jinx war over the holidays, or my reflexes wouldn't be nearly as good.

Looking at the astonished faces, I began to feel more than a little uncomfortable.

"Um, sorry, I know it was none of my business. I just couldn't stand to see him treat you like that," I said. Maybe jinxing someone wasn't the best way to make a first impression around here…

The ginger haired boy seemed to come back to reality first, and stuck out his hand immediately.

"Hello, I'm Ron Weasley."

I smiled, relief washing over me.

"Elena Holland, a pleasure to meet you," I said, taking his hand.

His eyes got nearly as big as Blondie's had when he turned into a human fur-ball dispenser.

"Holland? As in Holland Brooms?"

"Yup, _that_ Holland family," I laughed.

"I'm Hermione Granger," said the girl. Close up I noticed that she had beautiful brown eyes and curly brown hair, which seemed to be struggling against the hair tie holding it in place.

"Um, if you don't mind my asking, what kind of wand is that?" asked Hermione, "I've never read about something like it."

"And that tells you something," said Ron.

I didn't blame her, my wand was pretty weird looking, but I liked it. It was different, just like me.

It was made of wood, but over the wood, there were thousands of tiny, thin threads of shining crystal that wound around it and formed a ribbon twisting around it that cut into the wood and looked like a river winding through a cherry wood forest.

"Well, I had to have it made, because the old wizard in the wand shop in France couldn't find anything for me. You should have seen his shop afterwards; I had practically blown it up! The wand's part cherry wood with a willow core and inside that it's got unicorn hair. This stuff over here is crystal and stardust."

"Wow, that's one conflicting wand, how does it work with all of those elements?" asked Hermione.

"You know, I'm not sure. Monsieur Deveraoux said it was like me, 'you are composed from much conflict, yet somehow that is how these elements have the ability to work in harmony. It is in your very essence, child. It is only fitting that your wand is the same.' " I said, using air quotes.

Hermione nodded, looking like her mind was working over this and piecing it together with all her other knowledge.

Ron was looking meaningfully at the third member of their group, who still hadn't been introduced.

"Hi, erm, I'm Harry, Harry Potter," said the guy with emerald eyes a little shyly, hesitating on his surname.

_Aha! That's his face was familiar! Hell, why hadn't I recognised him before? Oh that's right; my memory is pathetic and gives out on me at the most inopportune moments._

"It's a pleasure to meet you Harry," I smiled at him and shook his hand, finally feeling comfortable now that I had some people to sit with.

Oh, wait a minute; they hadn't said I could sit with them yet.

"Um, I don't suppose I could join you?" I asked a little meekly. Bollocks, where was my usual confidence? It had deserted me in my time of need! A pox on Murphy and his accursed law!

"Of course!" cried everyone in unison, which made me laugh.

I settled into my seat next to Hermione, opposite Harry and Ron. Smiling to myself, I thought what a stroke of luck it had been that I had met the trio.

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*=Zoltoi is a Russian term of endearment, literally it means 'gold'

**=Leibchen is another Russian endearment, it means 'darling' or 'sweetheart'

Reviews make me happy!


	3. 2 Sorted

**Chapter Two**

Hello all you cool people of Fanfiction! Here's the next chapter, please send me some feed back, it'll keep me from sucking. Once again, a big thank you to my Beta**, DeepCrimson91**! Check out her stories, most of which you will find on my favourites list.

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**Sorted **

**Harry**

The sweet cart rolled down the hall, still with the same woman Ron and I had seen on my first ride to Hogwarts pushing it.

"Would you like anything dears?" she asked.

"Nothing for me," said Hermione, who, as always, had her nose buried in a book.

"I'm covered thanks," said Elena with a smile.

Ron simply glanced at me with a mix of pleading and disappointment. I knew he would never outright ask for the cash, he was too proud.

"Sorry mate, I forgot my wallet in my other bag."

The corners of his mouth drooped slightly, even though I knew for a fact that he had gorged himself sufficiently at home; there was no satisfying Ron's stomach.

"Here Ron, have one on me," said Elena.

"Really? Thanks!"

"Ron!" said Hermione, "you had a huge breakfast! You don't need anything from that cart!"

"It's okay Hermione, I know that there is no such thing as 'full' for guys our age," Elena said with a laugh.

"See Mione, Elena knows what she's talking about," Ron said.

"Please, call me Lena."

"Are you sure, er- Lena?" asked Hermione.

"Of course! What good is money if you can't spend it on friends?"

While all this was happening, Ron was stocking up on enough chocolate frogs to last a normal person the entire school year. It would probably be finished by the time we got to school.

Elena frowned slightly at Ron's stash.

"Ron, mate, I think you took a little too much," I said, my gaze flickering to Elena's puckered brow.

"Oh no! It's not that at all! It's just…how can you eat those things?"

"Wha goo ooh meeg?" asked Ron, trying to talk around the three frogs in his mouth.

"It's just, well, they look alive," she said, nose wrinkling.

Ron shrugged. Hermione rolled her eyes. Elena laughed.

Bloody hell but her laugh was intoxicating! I was almost close to assuming she was part Veela.

She was totally different from all the other girls I had met, all the _people_ I had met. I'm not sure I had met anyone to have made any less of a scene of me being, well, me.

She pulled something small and brown from her pocket. Opening the paper bag, she popped one of its contents into her mouth and began to suck.

"What are those?" asked Ron immediately, already a quarter of the way through his stack.

Elena just grinned and offered him the bag. He dipped his hand in and drew out a small brown ball.

"They're called Glitters," said Elena, having tucked the sweet into the side of her mouth. "These ones are chocolate and toffee flavoured."

"Why do the call them Glitters?" asked Hermione.

Elena held up her finger and sucked hard for a few seconds.

"Because of this," she said. Something curios happened then, strange sparkles seemed to flutter out of her mouth, and then grouped together to form the words she had just spoken in the air. They lingered for a moment, and then dissipated.

"Amazing!" said Ron, immediately throwing the sweet into his mouth, before exclaiming loudly.

"Oops, I should have warned you, it does feel rather strange at first," Elena giggled.

For the rest of the ride, we occupied ourselves with sucking on the Glitters and marvelling at our words shimmering in the air around us. Soon it was time to change into our robes, and when Elena came back, I was surprised to see she looked no less startling in the plain black robes.

"I wonder what house you'll be put in," said Hermione suddenly.

"Oh! I totally forgot about that! What are the houses anyway?"

"Hufflepuff; for the loyal, Ravenclaw; for the brilliant, Slytherin; for the sneaky, and Gryffindor; for the brave," recited Hermione.

"What house are you in?" Elena asked curiously.

"We're all in Gryffindor," I said.

"Well then, I'll just have to be in Gryffindor too. After all, I don't know anyone in any of the other houses."

"Actually, Malfoy is in Slytherin," I said, even saying the jerk's name irritated me.

"Malfoy?" she asked, her brow slightly furrowed.

"The boy you jinxed outside the compartment," clarified Hermione.

"Bloody git," mumbled Ron, still munching away.

Elena's lips puckered, "Hmm, well I don't think I'll like Slytherin much if they're all like him."

"He's one of the worst," admitted Hermione.

"Bloody git," repeated Ron.

Elena grinned, "If I didn't know better Ron, I would swear you didn't like Malfoy."

"Bloody git."

Elena simply burst into peals of laughter, tears of mirth running down her face after a while. I couldn't help smiling at the sound, it was so different from anything I had ever heard before, and yet so very, very familiar. It reminded me of the Golden Snitch's wings beating inside my hand, of the sweet summer wind, raindrops splashing on a window, and the sound of someone tapping a crystal glass before making a speech. It reminded me of many other things too, now that I thought about it, and for a while I drifted, trying to place what would most suit having her laughter in the background.

I must have gotten lost in my own head, because the next minute I was jostled by Ron as he struggled to cram the remaining chocolate frogs into his pockets. Every time he moved there was a shuffle of crinkling papers.

"We're here!" cried Hermione, leaping up and hurriedly packing her books into her bag.

"We're here?" asked Elena, rushing over to the window and pressing her face up against it. Now the sounds of the students around us packing up as bags bumped together and one or two people fell over. Three or four jinxes were fired, and some one swore loudly after a bang, which I'm guessing was a falling trunk.

"We're here!" repeated Hermione, pulling Elena back from the window.

"We're here!" Elena laughed.

The girls went on chanting the phrase for as long as it took to get of the train, and by then Elena was practically dancing down the platform in front of us, before stopping abruptly and clutching her coat around her.

"Why is it so COLD?" she exclaimed loudly with a mournful groan to Hermione.

I had a sudden and strange urge to offer her my scarf. Strange, but some how unsurprising.

"It helps if you move quickly, gets the blood going you know?" Hermione replied, rubbing her knees together herself. Elena sort of shuffle walked for a few minutes, before letting out an "Ugh!" and just skipped instead, swinging her arms vigorously.

She looked a bit like a murderous ballerina.

I looked about for Hagrid, listening for the familiar call of 'firs'-years over 'ere…firs'-years...' but it didn't come. Instead, quite a different voice, a brisk female one, was calling out, "First-years line up over here, please! All First-years to me!"

"Who are you?" The Professor asked when she caught sight of Elena skipping towards her.

"I'm Elena Holland, I'm new," said Lena, skipping up to Professor Grubbly-Plank and bouncing to a stop just in front of her, making the teacher take an involuntary step backwards. Elena still bobbed up and down on her feet, trying to keep moving.

"Right, you'll be coming with me then," said Professor Grubbly-Plank.

"Alright," she turned to us and gave our group a hopeful smile "I hope I'll be put with you guys! See you later!" And with that she went skipping off with the first years, most of whom stopped and stared as she blew past them, a beatific smile lighting up her face.

**Elena**

I skipped all the way to the boats, and the gazed at the lake until the castle came into rose into the deep indigo sky, rosy orange lights flickered and danced from the windows and over the waters to greet the boats, everything welcomed me in, but terrified me at the same time. Would there be a place for me in the magnificent castle? A place where I felt like I belonged? Was there a spot where I could grow and shine in what would soon be my home away from home? I bit my lip and tried not to think of the alternative, tried to think of something else instead.

My dad had gone here too; I think he had been sorted into Ravenclaw. It made sense; my dad was kind of a nerd. Thinking of the sorting ceremony made me feel like I was being squeezed too tight, like there were thousands of marbles inside me rolling around, or that my stomach was being treated like cake batter whisked together by hundreds of house elves with wooden spoons.

When we'd landed on the already muddied shore and walked through the huge front doors, we were lead down a maze of corridors until I was met by a woman with a few wrinkles, a severe black bun and a dignified way of carrying herself. Her name was apparently Professor McGonagall. She explained that we would enter the Great Hall, line up in an orderly fashion, and then we would be sorted into our houses; take a seat at that table, and so on until there was no-one left. I was placed at the very back of the line as I wasn't a first year but still needed to be Sorted. Waiting, I closed my eyes and pretended I was going on stage to sing, not have my future decided. It seemed to work; because my stomach stopped doing funny things.

Entering through another set of massive wooden doors that flew open, I caught my breath as I peered at the room around me. It was like a medieval banquet hall, but what I loved most was the ceiling. Yes, yes, I know it sounds incredibly boring, but this was no ordinary ceiling, this one looked like the night sky, complete with stars and everything! And then there were hundreds of candles floating in the air to provide more than enough light for the whole hall. I spotted Ron, Hermione and Harry seated at a table that had a flag of gold and red, it had a lion and a chequered background in the coat of arms.

Something caught my eye at a table filled with rather shady looking figures in green and silver robes. Oh, now I saw what it was; Malfoy was bobbing his blonde head up and down. When he saw me looking his way, he glared daggers, but the effect was ruined when he had to lean over the side of the table and retched out another hairball.

I grinned smugly.

_Cool, a new personal best. That was what, like three hours?_

The first kid who went up to be sorted was a pretty little girl, she had the old looking hat placed on her head, and was nearly as startled as I was to hear it speak. It announced that she was to join Hufflepuff, and the respective table cheered for its newest member.

Ages later, but at the same time it felt very sudden; it was me. I tried not to let my legs collapse as I made my way up to the stool.

A man with a beard so long it nearly brushed the floor; who looked as old as time itself, stood up from the centre of the staff table. I recognized him the second I caught sight of his blue eyes; Albus Dumbledore. Headmaster of Hogwarts, Mugwump, and one heck of a hopscotch champ if rumors were to be believed.

Why was he standing up though? Had I done something wrong? I'd only done a simple concealment charm when I ran away from that Muggle policeman, surely that wasn't serious? Oh yes, and there was that hairball jinx, but that jerk deserved it! Dumbledore cleared his throat and the whispers that had started during the sorting stopped immediately.

_Oh shit, oh shit oh shit oh shit-_

"As you have undoubtedly noticed, we have one more student to be sorted tonight before we may stuff ourselves silly," he said, there was light laughter. "This is Elena Holland, and she will be joining our fifth years. Professor McGonagall," he said, gesturing for her to bring the hat over to me.

_Double sh__it. Oh my God, what if I'm in Slytherin? That blonde jackass will skin me alive-_

_Wait, since when was _I_ afraid of some stupid playground bully? _

Professor McGonagall drew nearer.

_Breathe, Lena. Breathe, remain calm, it's going to be okay._

The musty hat was placed on my head, and I thought about being put into Gryffindor with all my might.

"Ah, another Holland I see," said the hat. Why was it talking out loud? It hadn't for any of the others. Why were my defining characteristics being read out to the world? Why was I so bloody nervous?

"Hmm, yes your father was in Ravenclaw; you could go there, you are certainly bright enough. Hufflepuff is also in the running with your faithfulness and devotion, and because of that there's a chance for Slytherin too with your ability to manipulate to achieve your goals. Oh, now this IS interesting! So much courage and passion, there's a good bet for Gryffindor." It paused for a moment. "I see you have a stubborn streak, hmm, yes, very stubborn, very tenacious. And, what have we here? A temper! Ah, you do not forgive easily… Such a conundrum in you child!"

This piece of musty cloth was making me sound like a science experiment. It made me out to be a manipulative, hateful girl with a sweet and understanding mask. Stupid hat, I wasn't _that _unforgiving… generally. Then again, better to appeal to it's better side seeing as it could possibly decide the rest of my foreseeable future.

_Gryffindor! Please, please, PLEASE sir! Er, hat? Erm, oh whatever I am meant to call you!_

"There's much talent here, and-"  
"Hurry up already!" shouted someone from the audience. I tried, and failed, not to giggle.

**Harry**

"Hurry up already!" shouted Peeves from the back of the hall. He was gleefully waiting, like everyone else, to see which house would get such a jewel. Well, seeing as it was Peeves, he probably just wanted to make a nuisance of himself.

"It looks like a fair shot for all the houses! She may have to rotate!" whispered Hermione.

"As I was saying," continued the hat, and if it could, I'd have sworn that the thing was glaring at Peeves. "A most peculiar case indeed, a heart of gold and much loyalty for Hufflepuff,"

"That rules out Slytherin," whispered Ron.

"Cunning and devious for Slytherin,"

"Or not," said Hermione nervously.

"Intelligence for Ravenclaw,"

"Come on Lena, you're a Gryffindor girl!" Ron said, as we all held hands tightly, hoping for the same thing. It was an insane hope, an unexplainable hope. I had known the girl not even a day, but it seemed like if she were in any house other than Gryffindor, it would be the worst disappointment of my life.

"And passion, courage, and a fiery temper for Gryffindor."

"Come on, Come on!" I muttered

"Better be….."

**Elena**

"Better be….."

"Please, sir," I whispered desperately, I had never wanted anything so much in my life, "put me in Gryffindor, please, please, please, please-"

"GRYFFINDOR!" It proclaimed. A deafening roar went up in the hall from the table that was now mine. "Yes! Thank you! Thank you so much!" I whispered to the hat exultantly. It was removed from my head, and I leapt off the stage, landing on the balls on my feet, knees bent, just like my mother had taught me to.

Then I could hear nothing but "Well done!" and people were patting me on the back and punching my arm, and I think, but I can't be sure, someone's hand grazed my butt. There also seemed to be three male voices chanting; 'we got the hot girl, we got the hot girl,' over and over at some part of the table. Weird.

When I found Harry, Hermione and Ron, we all shared a massive hug.

"Welcome to the family!" cried Ron.

"Thanks, Ron," I said, smiling so hard my cheeks hurt. He may not know it, but those four words had just melted any apprehension I felt. A warm fuzzy balloon was rising up in my chest, and his sweet smile and sincere eyes only made it grow.

"You're going to be so happy here," Hermione said, as I took a seat next to her. There were scuffling sounds and a few curses as the crowd parted for two really tall boys. Well, maybe my perspective is a little warped, because I am pretty short.

"Welcome, Miss Holland," said a tall, ginger haired boy that looked like an older version of Ron.

"We were just coming over to congratulate you," continued another one.

_-Wait, another one?_

Harry, seeing my confusion, introduced the new comers.

"Lena, this is Fred and George," he said, gesturing to one, and then the other boy. "Ron's older, _twin _brothers," he added.

I could already tell that I would take at least a term to tell the two apart.

"Nice to meet you," I said, holding out my hand.

After we had all calmed down, the feast began. Food appeared on plates in front of us, and there was something for everyone.

Ron began heaping food onto his plate as I marveled at the spread. What to try first? It all looked so good!

After I had piled up my plate with the delicious food, I dug in. This was, of course, when everyone thought it to be an appropriate time to re-enact the Spanish Inquisition.

Stupid people, couldn't they see I was eating! Ah well, better be nice… This time. I'll have them trained soon enough.

"So Elena, where did you go to school before you came here?" asked a good looking boy with an adorable Irish accent.

"Beauxbatons and please, call me Lena. Who are you, if I may ask?"

"Seamus," he blushed slightly. Maybe he had noticed I was trying to talk around a half eaten potato. Not such a pretty sight. I'd have to remember he was big on table manners, rather odd for a boy my age.

"How come you don't have an accent?" asked a girl with curly blonde hair.

"I haven't got the faintest inclination, could be because I speak English to some people, and French to my school friends and teachers, and Russian to others."

A few people 'wow-ed' at my trilingual-ness. I tried not to be smug, and began to find that I liked the attention, before beating down my ego with a stick.

"What was it like at Beauxbatons?" someone else asks.

"Pretty similar to how it is here, at least so far, although we didn't have this awesome ceiling."

Giggles erupted from some, and others just gave a knowing smirk as if to say 'oh yes, we know are school is the best.' They weren't far off, not if things continued this well.

"Never mind the ceiling," said a girl with beautiful dark skin; it reminded me of the deep wood that was in my dad's study. "What I want to know is if you play quidditch as well as they say you do."

I gave one of my trade mark grins (smile with the one side of your mouth higher than the other, and raise your eyebrows ever so slightly). "Just show me the pitch, and we'll soon find out."

The girl raised an eyebrow. Oops, she didn't get the joke… then again my humor was a little weird. And my ego was swelling uncomfortably.

"What I mean is, I'm not sure what the standard is, so just let me know when tryouts are, and then you can see if I'm up to scratch," I amended, praying I hadn't put my tiny foot in it already.

"Honestly Angelina, what kind of question is that?" said Hermione with false exasperation.

"Yeah, her family _invented_ quidditch, remember?" Ron said.

This was rather disconcerting. Everyone knew who I was already, well, at least they thought they did. It was just going to make it that much tougher to make them see what I was like in reality.

**Harry**

Elena pouted slightly, looking a little put out. She didn't look bad when she frowned; in fact, she looked prettier than a lot of girls did when they weren't frowning. However, when a wonderful smile, followed by a mischievous grin had previously lit her face, it was almost unbearable to see her even slightly unhappy.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

She looked at me with disappointed eyes.

"Everyone here knows so much about me already, but I don't know any of them. It's like they have all made up their minds about me before I've said a word to them."

_I know how that feels._

"Don't worry. They'll get to know you in time," I said, trying to reassure her. It seemed to work, because the smile came back.

"So what positions are open on the team?" she asked, turning her attention back to Angelina.

"What do you play?" asked Angelina, immediately going into captain mode.

Elena grinned, "all of them."

Angelina raised an eyebrow.

"What, don't you believe me?" Elena asked innocently.

"Not until I see it," said Angelina with a small grin.

Elena's smile widened, then blinked, seemingly distracted, her eyes flickering around the hall.

Leaning forward, she whispered "why is everyone looking at us?"

"Not us," said Fred.

"You," finished George.

Confusion covered her face. "What? Why _me?_"

The twins looked at each other and laughed with everyone else in ear-shot.

"What are you laughing at? And why is everyone looking at me?" asked Elena, a tiny smile tugging at her lips while her eyes remained mildly shocked.

"Because, dear Lena," spluttered George.

"You're; what's the word we're looking for?" continued Fred.

"Gorgeous?" asked Ron.

"Alluring?" put in Lee Jordan.

"Dazzling?" asked Hermione.

"As usual Miss Granger, you're right. So Lena, the reason is that the blokes are all trying to get a good look at you, while the girls are all thinking up a hex for warts," said George.

"Oh," Elena said laughing a little, while a blush stole across her face.

_Interesting, she's modest… Or, maybe she just doesn't know…_

"Well don't act so surprised!" said Seamus.

Elena just continued to blush and remained mostly silent for the rest of the meal. Well, until people were ready with their next round of questions, all of which she answered animatedly.

**Elena**

Soon it was tome to go up to the dorms, this term the password was 'broomsticks'.

"What a coincidence," said Angelina.

I laughed, glad that I'd managed to save myself; I liked this girl, she was fun.

"Girls to the right, boys to the left," said a prefect, pointing to the staircases leading to the dorms.

"We had better go unpack," said Hermione.

"Yeah," I sighed, not ready for the festivities to end. Then again, who said they had to? "Hey, after we've unpacked, who's up for a little house party?"

The twins looked impressed. Ron looked excited. Hermione was shocked. I'm not sure what Harry's feelings were.

"What? We always had a party the day we arrived back in France. Then again, we were always just looking for an excuse to party."

"I'm not sure, we have school in the morning-" Hermione said.

"Wait, what? I thought we would have a day to settle in first," I said.

Ron shook his head sadly, "they're a bunch of slave drivers here."

"Oh," I said, disappointed.

"There'll be plenty of time for parties-" began Fred.

"-once we've got something to celebrate," said George.

"Huh? Please explain?"

"Who wants to celebrate going _back _to school?" said Fred.

"We'd see more sense in having a party when we're _leaving _the place," said George.

They had a point. Kind of.

I hadn't been looking forward to seeing the dorm rooms; at Beauxbatons we were given a room between two people that you could decorate in anyway you pleased. I'd gathered from my father's reminiscent griping about how much he'd hated the beds and how irritating it was to share a room with people when they were all as drunk as anything and he was cramming for the next Transfiguration exam. I was pleasantly surprised though, even if it wasn't the standard I had come to expect. Looking around my new room, I had to admit, it wasn't bad at all. It had a red Persian rug on the floor, some of the most beautiful four poster beds I had ever seen, and as I got closer, what looked like 100% cotton sheets, with a hand embroidered duvet. Granted it was all fairly old and the rug was so faded you could hardly see the pattern in some parts, but I liked the idea that the rug held a story in every stain, that perhaps there had been someone amazing huddling in my duvet one winter.

My trunk had been brought up and laid at the foot of my bed, Silver was in her cage snoozing happily, and Athena was doing the same on my pillow.

I turned to look at the human inhabitants of the room as girls began walking in. Some I knew; others I didn't.

After we had all introduced ourselves (there were surprisingly few of us), I brought out my inkwell, quill and paper, and sat down in front of the window.

"What are you doing?" enquired Hermione.

"I'm writing to my parents to let them know I'm okay. They get worried sometimes."

_Even more so recently, _I thought to myself. _Must be the whole moving-schools thing. _I smiled, though my cheeks protested. _Sometimes I think they worry about me enough for three people, but I love it that they care so much._

Hermione nodded and went to unpack her own things.  
I quickly wrote to my parents, saying that I had arrived safely and the train hadn't been sucked into a black hole or anything, before attaching it to Silver.

"Mum and dad, please," I said to her. She looked okay with it, even though I had anticipated reluctance after the train ride.

Climbing into bed that night, I thought I would never be able to get to sleep; it was all just too exciting! How wrong I was, I was out before my head even touched my half of the pillow (Athena seemed to like the bed too).

* * *

Review! Review! All reviewers get a PREVIEW of what is to come!


	4. 3 First Day

**Chapter Three**

Alright here comes part Three, and with it my extreme apologies for a) changing it, b) not actually moving the story along with the next instalment, and c) most likely aggravating you beyond belief.

On the up side, I'm editing again! And I've got the next chapter edited and written! Yay!

Once again a big thank you to** DeepCrimson91**, my amazing beta .

* * *

**Detention, and Learning The School Motto**

**Elena**

I was by no stretch of the imagination a 'morning' person. So it was therefore no surprise that when some imbecile attempted to wake me up, I did not budge. I screwed my eyes tightly shut and willed them to bugger off.

"Lena," said a bossy feminine voice. "You have to get up now."

Now I was not the type of person who ever woke up wondering where they were, in my opinion that was all total crap people put in books and things so that the character could come off as a little innocent and whatever. However I will admit that I wasn't entirely sure who the owner of this irritating voice was.

"Lena," said the voice. Then someone poked me.

My snapped open and narrowed under the sheets.

"Lena," poke, "get," poke, "up" poke poke.

"Alright, I guess I'm just going to have to tickle you-"

_Okay that's _it_._

The fingers of the irksome female came down and had scarcely brushed my body through the covers before I raised myself up with incredible speed, still covered by my sheet and duvet, and turned around and roared at the vile woman.

That's right, I roared. Well I roared as best as a human can; yelling 'ROAR!' for a prolonged time and at the top of my lungs.

There was a chorus of terrified screams as the sheet obscuring my vision flapped about and out of the way. I lowered my make-shift wings and glared. I now could see who had been stupid enough to poke me, I was surprised.

The girl in front of me was the really smart one- whose name escapes me- who I'd met on the train. She'd been reading _Hogwarts; A History._

"You of all people," I growled at her, "should know the school motto."

The wide-eyed girl stopped looking so wide-eyed and instead frowned.

"Of course I know it! I've read _Hogwarts; a History_ at least eleven times!"

"And so," I hissed, getting up on my knees, and then swinging one leg out of the bed, "why do you not take heed of it?"

I was out of bed and standing on the cold wooden floor boards now, still tangled up inside the sheets, and a small part of me was crying out mournfully for the company of my warm bed.

Recognition flickered in through the eyes of girl who's name I couldn't remember, and a tiny smile tugged at her lips. I narrowed my eyes further. If there was one thing that bugged me when I was cranky, it was people smiling.

_I sound like a bitter old lady_, I thought absentmindedly to myself.

"Never tickle a sleeping dragon," stated... damn it! Why can't I remember people's names?

There were titters in the room, and I jerked my head sharply to death glare them. Stupid girls, I'll get them later.

Seeing as I was up, and there was now no chance of going back to sleep, I clawed off my covers and stalked over to my trunk.

Looking at the boring and hideously ordinary uniform, it was clear that some adjustments would need to be made before I would wear it. Yesterday in the train I'd been too pumped to care too much about how I looked, but now it was a necessity. I'd read enough of the huge rule book to know that there were sufficient loopholes to cater for my needs.

I found a pair of black skinny jeans, magically copied my Gryffindor crest onto a matching waistcoat, tied the red and yellow tie loosely and pulled on my pair of black converse All Stars.

_There, now I can wear it and not want to gag._

Having my grouchy scale at four point five, I went down to the common room to see who could take me to the food before I got really cranky and hexed someone.

"Morning Lena," called Ron, his cheerful voice grating against my ears.

_Why was everyone so damned perky? It was too early for this, I hadn't even had my coffee yet!_

"Morning Ron," I replied flatly.

_Wait a minute, where was Harry? Ron and he look like they're usually joined at the hip._

When I put this question to him, he said "he'll be along in a minute, he, uh, didn't sleep well last night."

"Oh okay. What lesson do we have up first?" I wanted to get an idea of how much coffee I'd have to consume.

"Er," he checked his timetable quickly. "Charms with Hufflepuff."

I shrugged, not bad then.

"Morning Harry!" Ron called suddenly at me, with that same, perky tone.

I tried not to flinch.

_Circe**! What is with this boy? Did he have an overdose of cheering charm or something?_

Harry smiled at me, looking immensely amused by my new uniform, "Morning, Lena."

I smiled slightly and lifted my head in greeting.

"Now all we need is Hermione, and then we can go to breakfast," said Ron, rubbing his stomach.

"Good," I intoned.

_Who was Hermione again?_

"I'm coming," said Hermione as she raced down the stairs, her book bag making her tilt sideways.

_Aha! That's what her name is. Merlin's hat how many books did the child need? _

"Great, now can we all please go and eat? I'm hungry and when I'm hungry I get cranky."

"You were cranky al- Lena, what _have _you done to your uniform?" Hermione exclaimed, her voice raising three octaves.

"I looked normal in it. Normal is not me," I said honestly. "Besides the rules have nothing against my adjustments."

"Why do you even bother reading them, if you're just going to break them?" asked Hermione.

"I always say that you should learn the rules so you can break them properly," I said with a yawn.

Hermione frowned. "At least wear a robe!"

"Ugh fine!" I snapped, "Accio school robe."

Hermione looked a little hurt.

_Oo-oh, I hate it when people make me cranky._

"I'm sorry 'Moine," I said with a slightly-louder-than-needed exhale. "I'm not a morning person and I need my coffee. I'm sorry I roared at you, and I won't wear my new uniform without a robe over it again."

She looked mollified. "That's alright, I guess I should have remembered the school motto better," she said with a grin.

I grinned back, noticing Harry and Ron's confused looks.

_Now if I could just get some food and coffee all would be right in the world._

My robe came swooping down the stairs, and landed neatly in my hand.

I pulled it as we ran to the Great Hall- Ron seemed to like food as much as I did- and set about grabbing the toast from each other.

Three cups of strong coffee later, my grouchy scale was at zero, and I was smiling and laughing with my new friends.

"Lena, could you please pass the Marmalade?" asked Hermione from the other side of Ron, who was currently stuffing his face with as much as he could lay his hands on.

"Sure, here," I handed her the jar.

"Hello, young Harry," said a voice from behind me.

"Oh my gosh! I didn't know you guys had ghosts here!" I said.

The ghost in question turned and smiled warmly at me. "Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington at your service, Madame," he said, before bowing his head and kissing my hand.

I was a little taken aback by his gesture, but quickly overcame it.

"We all call him Nearly Headless Nick," chimed in Ron.

Sir Nicholas didn't seem very happy with this.

"Elena Holland, a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Sir Nicholas," I said quickly.

"Ah yes, you were the young lady that stumped the Sorting Hat!"

"Yeah, that old hat was confused alright, good thing he knew the right place to put her," said a grinning Seamus.

"Cheers to that," said I happily, raising my glass.

**Cedric**

I laughed as Ernie MacMillan balanced a spoon on his nose, and laughed even harder when it fell off and landed in his porridge; splattering us all with soggy white lumps.

"So," began Aaron Smith (Zacharias Smith's cousin, much to Aaron's disgust) "did you lads catch a look at that new Gryffindor?"

"The titchy one? What was his name? Abercrombie?" asked Justin Finch-Fletchy.

"No you muppet!" said Aaron, cuffing Justin over the head. "The fit one that got sorted last! The Holland girl!"

Aaron lived in London with his family, and spent a lot of time around Muggles. He'd picked up so much of their slang that we didn't know what he was saying half the time, but in this case it wasn't hard to decipher his meaning.

"Oh that one!" said Justin.

"Yeah, 'that one'," Aaron said, playfully punching his friend's arm.

"Morning," said Zacharias, who had just swept into our midst and set himself down between Justin and Aaron.

"Morning Zack," I said politely. I kind of felt sorry for the guy; he didn't really have any friends. Then again, he was too big-headed to notice this.

"So what are we talking about?" he asked, serving himself the rest of the pancakes.

"The Holland girl," said Justin, who didn't looked pleased that Zack had helped himself to the pancakes he had intended to guzzle.

"I heard she's hanging out with Harry," said Ernie, who had gone back to his porridge.

I stiffened; ever since I'd lost Edward, I wasn't sure how to feel towards The Boy Who Lived.

"Figures, the minute a beautiful girl gets here, he nabs her for himself," Zack grumbled. He'd never quite gotten over the fact that Hannah Abbot had thought Harry was 'cuter' than he was.

"Oh come off it," said Ernie "She was probably going to end up with them anyway, what with her being a Holland and all."

"I dunno, she doesn't act like much of a Golden Girl," said Justin.

"What do you mean?" asked Aaron.

"Well, apparently she jinxed Malfoy so well on the train that he had to get Snape to brew him up an antidote. He was coughing up hair balls for thirteen hours."

"Couldn't he have just gone to Madame Pomfrey?" I asked, relieved that the conversation had drifted.

"Malfoy? And admit that someone was better than him? Not a chance," said Justin, who was quietly eating Zack's pancakes while he bragged to some third year about how he'd supposedly battled a troll in the holidays.

"I like this girl already," said Aaron, grinning at the thought of Malfoy throwing up the congealed brown hairballs.

"You already liked her before you heard that," I pointed out.

"Yeah, but now I genuinely like her, and I don't just want to snog her face off."

We laughed so hard that pumpkin juice came out of Ernie's nose, which made us laugh even harder.

"Aah, it's so good to see young people having fun," said the Fat Friar as he came floating over to us.

"Good morning, Friar," I said, wiping away the tears of mirth that had collected in my eyes.

"Good Morning Cedric, how are things looking this year for the Quidditch team?"

"Great; we've already set the date for tryouts."

"Good show, doing it earlier so we can train more?"

"That's the idea, sir."

"Ah well, I see Sir Nicholas is introducing himself to that charming Holland girl, so I'd better do the same," and with that, the friar flew over to a blushing girl who's hand was being kissed by nearly Headless Nick.

"Even the ghosts fancy her," remarked Justin.

"Hey, where'd my pancakes go?" cried an outraged Zack, causing us to go into hysterics again. Funny how some days I could laugh at the slightest thing and others it would take Snape getting thirty pies in the face to make me crack a smile.

"Hey, Ced," came a shy voice from beside me.

I turned to see Cho; my girlfriend of a year. I knew how lucky I was to have her; she was smart and beautiful and played Quidditch, but sometimes I wondered what it would be like to have a girlfriend my parents didn't dote on. A girlfriend who didn't have a 'reputation' to maintain or a posse that followed her around. A girlfriend who sometimes did crazy things, and made a fool of herself, and who could laugh at herself. A girlfriend I didn't have to be perfect for.

_Stop deluding yourself, Ced. Cho's great, and she's your girlfriend; you shouldn't be thinking, or in this case, wishing that there was someone out there for you who was all those things…_

"Morning, Cho," I smiled.

She smiled back and sat down next to me, grabbing my hand under the table and putting it on her thigh.

Recently she'd been very ...confusing. Aaron calls her bipolar, but that's a bit harsh. It's just that... she seems really shy sometimes, but then a split second later, she's all over me or something. Take the train ride to Hogwarts for example; one minute we're talking about the coming year, and how I'm a prefect, and the next thing she's trying to suffocate me with her tongue.

"How'd you sleep?" I asked her, trying to disentangle my hand gently so as not to offend her. However after a few moments it became clear that she wasn't letting go, and so I attempted to eat my breakfast left handed.

"Very well thanks, and you?"

"He snored the whole night," put in Aaron.

"Yeah, I slept pretty deeply," I said, kicking him under the table.

Cho's face fell slightly, "you didn't dream of me?"

_What? _

A few weeks ago I told Cho that I'd had a dream about her, and now it seemed she thought I dreamed about her all the time, or at least that I should.

"Erm, no, not last night."

"Oh. Well I'd better get going, need to get my books."

"Well that was odd," said Justin after she'd left.

"I always thought she was a nutter," said Aaron.

"Yeah, weird that one," said Zack with a sniff.

"You think any girl who doesn't kiss the ground you walk on is weird," said Aaron. "Which pretty much eliminates any female with half a brain."

"Well," said Zack, looking affronted, and left, his robes billowing out behind him in a way not unlike Snape's… I shivered a little; that was a disturbing thought.

"Holy Hippogriffs…" said Ernie, who had looked up from his mug of hot chocolate.

Turning to see what he was staring at, I took a sharp intake of breath.

The world seemed to be going at a fraction of its normal pace, and I watched the scene before me in slow motion.

Seated between Harry and a boy with sandy blonde hair, sat Elena Holland, savouring her peach in a state of ecstasy.

I watched as a thin river of juice slid past her wrist and down her arm. It only trailed down for a brief moment longer, until she raised her arm to lick the glistening trail with her pink tongue, before once again tenderly biting into the golden orb cupped in her hands, her lips slowly closing, and a tiny, deeply happy smile spreading itself across those same red, shining lips.

_Look away Ced. You have a girlfriend. LOOK AWAY._

I jerked my head back to my plate.

Aaron's jaw was slack, Ernie's eyes were the size of saucers, and food was falling from Justin's open mouth.

"Justin, you just lost some of your," I squinted at the pinkish lump, "sausage."

"Huh?" he said, still looking at the Gryffindor table.

Aaron snapped out of it, looked at me, and grinned.

"Too bad you have Cho, mate."

I rolled my eyes, and left to get my books, but not before a sound of mingled flutes and a child's laughter reached my ears.

Not many people were around in the halls at this time in the morning, but you could hear the cheerful bubbling sound of everyone talking and laughing all through the castle. It comforted me, although I'm not quite sure why. My polished shoes made a clean sound as they hit the tiles, and I found myself listening intently as I made my way to the common room.

I was glad to be back with my family. My Hufflepuff family of course, not my biological one. Not that I didn't like being with my biological family... It was just, harder, to be with them now. After what had happened.

Everything at home had changed, but at Hogwarts it nothing had. At first glance anyway. I was just so sick of change. I wanted something to stay the same, to go back to what it was before Edward had gone into that damn maze- no. Everything had been fine when he'd gone in. It was when he came _out _that nothing was right again.

"Pigmypuff," I muttered to the bust, and the wall slide around to let me in.

The Hufflepuff common room was as welcoming as ever, and I felt a little more at ease once inside. My books were right where I'd left them; on top of one of the many tables next to my book bag. Why couldn't everything be like that? Stay put right where you left it? Why did things have to move about while you weren't there?

I shook my head; this was ridiculous.

I pulled the bag onto my shoulder but stood and looked around for a moment longer. I looked at his chair; the one he used to sit in whenever he was in here. It was right by the window, but close enough to the fire so that you could still keep warm in winter. It was empty now, but not just because no one was sitting in it. Well actually that's exactly why it was empty, but it was more empty because to me, no one would ever sit in it again. It would never be whole.

Something like me.

I frowned and turned back to the wall, walking briskly out of it and towards my class.

I didn't so much think as I felt while I walked. Frustration and confusion swirled around with sharp edges of depression stabbing at something tender within my chest, all mixing but just resulting in a very hollow, nameless sense of loss and lack of hope. Then the frustration would kick in again, and then there'd sometimes be short stabs of almost tangible pain as the whole stupid wheel turned around and round all over again.

"Oi!" called a voice I knew almost better than my own, shattering for a moment the chaotic spin of my emotions with a ray of recognition and fond memories and happiness.

Aaron was down the hall, jogging towards me.

"Mate, you've got to stop walking to fast, you're making me look bad here."

I grinned weakly at him. Aaron had been my best mate since first year, and he knew me better than most people. He was easy to be around and always looking for a good time and a laugh. And a girl, he always had his mind on some or other girl.

"Look," he started. "I know you're... messed up right now. I don't know how to fix it mate and I really wish I could."

He looked at me with worried indigo eyes and scratched the back of his neck as he always did when he wasn't sure how to say something. I plastered one of my many half hearted smiles on and waited.

He blew out a puff of air, "I know we've talked about it a fair bit, but I just want you to know that I'm here for you mate."

I nodded, "I know, thanks Aaron."

He smiled and his eyes went back to their normal shade of plum, if still slightly clouded. His dad had been nature Sprite, and that's where he'd gotten his strange eyes from. The girls all went crazy for it though, so he was pretty chuffed with them being so different, even if he sometimes thought purple was a naff colour.

We walked together in silence to class, and arrived with a few others.

Flitwick's classroom had always been my favourite; it was large and sunny with tall windows, and we all loved Professor Flitwick himself.

Aaron hit my shoulder lightly.

"Here comes Elena Holland," he whispered.

I turned to see the Golden Trio plus one enter the class.

Hermione Granger immediately hurtled towards the front row and claimed four seats.

Aaron casually did the same and sat in the isle across, motioning me over. I smiled, shaking my head as Ernie and I joined him.

Elena Holland appeared from behind Ron Weasley and took her seat next to Hermione.

"Good morning class," said Professor Flitwick, clambering up onto his pile of books so he could see everyone.

"It's nice to see you all again, and welcome to you, Miss Holland," said Flitwick, nodding towards Elena, who gave a dazzling smile that sent my stomach into summersaults.

Flitwick seemed to be a little flustered as well.

"Ah yes, there's that Veela blood coming into play. It was your great grandmother, correct?"

'Yes, on my mother's side," came a strange voice. Strange in the sense that it was both smooth and slightly throaty like velvet, but sweet and tinkling, like sugar plums.

"As I understand it, you were top of your class at Beauxbatons?"

Elena inclined her head slightly, shrugged her shoulders a tiny bit.

"I am rather good."

"Ah, is there anything in particular you think we'd be interested in?" Flitwick asked.

"Umm…" pearly white teeth appeared and lightly bit her full red bottom lip.

Her eyes lit up, and she bounced over to the front of the class.

"Could I have a piece of glass?"

"Certainly my dear," Flitwick clambered down, and after a bit of shuffling, appeared once again with an old ink bottle.

Elena took out a peculiar looking wand, turned her wrist in a circle and a kind of sideways eight, before pointing it at the bottle and muttering something under her breath.

The glass began to gently, sort of unfold itself, twisting and turning, stretching and bending until it had been melded into a kind of round bowl with curved pieces at the rim. I recognised it immediately; Lily of the Valley. It had been one of Edward's favourite flowers, not that he'd ever told me, but he was always just that much happier when they bloomed.

"That's just transfiguration," said Zack condescendingly from beside Ernie.

"I know, I haven't done the charm yet," said Elena with her eyebrows raised just a fraction of an inch.

Again she twisted her wrist around, and this time sparkling white shimmers floated out and covered the glass flower.

The glass bowl glowed brightly for a moment, and then dulled. It still shone, hundreds of tiny rainbows danced through it.

"There; now it will sing to you, depending on what you put inside. Most people just use it as a source of entertainment, but I know my cousin uses it to test for poisons," Elena said happily.

"Brilliant!" cried Flitwick, clapping his hands.

Elena bowed her head and did a tiny curtsey.

"Try it!" said Aaron.

"Yes, yes, do go on Miss Holland," said Flitwick.

I hadn't seen him this happy since the time Fred and George Weasley had conjured up a whole herd of sugar mice and let them loose in his classroom.

"Um, okaaay…" she looked around, and beside me Aaron summoned a petal off the roses outside.

"How about this?" he asked, holding up the yellow petal.

"Perfect, thank you," she said, coming over to take it from him.

Coming over wasn't really the right description though, she only walked, but I could have sworn she sort of_ danced_.

She let the petal float down into the bowl, and then the room was filled with a soft sweet music. I couldn't place a single instrument; the sound seemed to be more of a force of nature, an essence of some kind.

"Bravo, bravo!" said the tiny Professor.

A pale pink blossomed in Elena's cheeks, so innocent it was enchanting.

"Easy Ced, you've got girlfriend, remember?" Aaron teased from beside me.

I rolled my eyes and punched his arm.

"Thank you Miss Holland, you may go back to your seat. Now, would everyone please take out their wands; we will quickly revise everything we covered last year, and then it's on to new work!"

Throughout the lesson, the glass lily sang in a tune that reminded me of blooming roses and laughter and joy, and I found it necessary to blink frequently.

More than once, I cast a glance over at the intriguing girl with the glowing aqua eyes.

**Elena**

I must admit, I had worried that I wouldn't be able to keep up with the classes here, but I found it was fine. They were a little faster paced, but otherwise it was fine. Besides, with Hermione to help me, this was going to be an easy year, at least in terms of school work. Divination had been so boring; I'd taken out my Percy Jackson book and read for the whole lesson. History of Magic had been just as bad, but I'd charmed my earrings to turn Professor Binns' droning voice into a chipmunk's. Goblin and Wizard diplomacy has never seemed so interesting.

I could say that after this last double of DADA, I would have survived my first day at Hogwarts, and pretty well too! Well, at least that's what I thought before I arrived at Professor Umbridge's classroom.

I nearly puked at the sight of her; she had a pink skirt, a pink shawl, a pink jumper, a pink barrette in her hair, pink shoes and sheer-pink stockings. I like pink, but really? The amount she wore just made her look like a flustered piglet. Eventually we all found seats; we sat in the third row, because Hermione wanted to sit in the front of course, but Ron refused and I was sure as hell not sitting in the back, but the second row had already filled up, so it was Ron, Harry, Hermione, and me.

*"Well, good afternoon!" she said in a cheerful and cloying voice.

Since none of the other teachers had waited for a reply, I sat silently, blinking at Professor Umbridge and trying not to give back my lunch.

"Tut, tut," she said. "_That _won't do, now, will it? I should like you, please, to reply 'Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge'. One more time, please. Good afternoon, class!"

We chanted back to her, and I raised an eyebrow. It's true, we were expected to stand whenever a teacher entered or exited a room, and when they greeted us we replied, but clearly that wasn't how things were done here.

"There, now," she said with a horrible false smile.

_Don't say it, don't say it, don't say it-_

"That wasn't too difficult, was it?" she continued in that grossly sweet voice of hers.

_She said it. _

I always hated people that said that. I had never been proven wrong to hate them, so I didn't have many expectations now from the woman.

"Wands away and quills out, please."

There was another thing, she said please almost every other minute.

I sighed, I _hated _lessons like this. I was good with practical work, not notes and theories.

"Well now, your teaching in this subject has been rather disrupted and fragmented, hasn't it?" stated the little piggy woman, turning to face the class with her hands clasped neatly in front of her. "The constant changing of teachers, many of whom do not seem to have followed any Ministry-approved curriculum,"

_Oh good Merlin, she's one of _those _people; Ministry puppets._

"Has unfortunately resulted in your being far below the standard we would expect to see in your OWL year. You will be pleased to know, however, that these problems are now to be rectified. We will be following a carefully constructed, theory-centred, Ministry-approved course of Defensive magic this year. Copy down the following please."

She rapped the blackboard with her stubby wand, and the course aims appeared.

I didn't write them down; I simply sat in my seat, jaw slack.

_I'm screwed. Theory-centred? I'm going to fail my OWL! _

_Oh, wait, I have Hermione… I'm saved! But this is still going to be the worst subject._

I sighed, and uncorked the bottle of orange ink.

I took my time, lazily looping my writing, making it look especially girly.

"Has everybody got a copy of _Defensive Magical Theory _by Wilbert Slinkhard?" Professor Umbridge trilled.

"Unfortunately," I muttered, and someone chuckled next to me.

I turned my head to see the cute guy from Charms who had given me the petal.

_Well hello there_

I smiled at him, he smiled back, but we were rudely interrupted by the pig woman.

"I think we'll try that again," said Umbridge. "When I ask you a question, I should like you to reply. 'Yes, Professor Umbridge', or 'No, Professor Umbridge'. So: has everyone got a copy of _Defensive Magical Theory_ by Wilbert Slinkhard?"

"Yes, Professor Umbridge," rang through the room.

"Good," said the freakishly happy hag. "I should like you to turn to page five and read 'Chapter One, Basics for Beginners'. There will be no need to talk."

She waddled over to her desk at sat staring at us with those tiny little eyes of hers.

I lifted up my book, and read the first sentence.

I think I stared at the same full stop for a whole minute before I realised that I was conscious.

_Well, I tried. Guess I'll just have to go back to Percy Jackson… _

Quietly, I slid my hand into my book bag, and felt around for the book, not as easy as you'd think, considering I had quite a few things wedged in there.

_Parchment… quill… wand… packet of Glitters… ink bottle… glass bottle- I think it's my bubble blower… hang on, how did it get in there? Ah well… Aha!_

I slipped out my book, and opened it inside the text book, effectively hiding it.

There was a slight breeze from my side, and looked up to see Hermione staring fixatedly at Professor Umbridge, her hand in the air.

I leaned forward to throw a confused look at Harry, he returned it.

Interesting.

I went back to my book, doing my best not to laugh at Percy's witty line, 'Go chase a doughnut,' _classic! _

After what seemed like an age, the so called 'teacher' decided that she couldn't ignore Hermione any longer.

"Did you want to ask something about the chapter, dear?" she asked Hermione, as if she only just noticed her.

"Not about the chapter, no."

"Well, we're reading just now. If you have other queries we can deal with them after class."

"I've got a query about your course aims," said Hermione.

_You and me both, like; how the hell do we learn to defend ourselves?_ I thought to myself, looking up from my 'textbook'.

The pig raised her eyebrows.

"And your name is?"

"Hermione Granger."

"Well, Miss Granger, I think the course aims are perfectly clear if you read them through carefully," said Professor Umbridge with determined sweetness.

"Well, I don't," said Hermione bluntly. "There's nothing written up there about _using _defensive spells."

The rest of the class turned to re-examine the course aims.

"_Using _defensive spells?" Professor Umbridge repeated with a little girlish laugh. Maybe she was a tad touched in the head.

"Why, I can't image any situation arising in my classroom that would require you to use a defensive spell, Miss Granger. You surely aren't expecting to be attacked during class?"

Okay, maybe she was bashed in the head.

"We're not going to use magic?" Ron exclaimed loudly.

"Students raise their hands when they wish to speak in my class, Mr -?"

"Weasley," said Ron, thrusting his fist in the air.

Professor Umbridge smiled widely, and turned her back on him. I sat bolt upright in my chair.

_WHAT?_

She now had my full and undivided attention. How _dare _she turn her back on a student?

Harry and Hermione immediately raised their hands too.

"Yes, Miss Granger? You wanted to ask something else?" she said.

"Yes," said Hermione. "Surely the whole point of Defence Against the Dark Arts is to practise defensive spells?"

"Are you a Ministry-trained educational expert, Miss Granger?"

_Oh, No. She. Didn't._

"No, but-"

"Well then, I'm afraid you are not qualified to decided what the 'whole point' of any class is. Wizards much older and cleverer than you have devised our new programme of study."

Oh, she was going to get it. I snapped my books closed, and punched my fist angrily into the air.

"You will be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk-free way –"

"What's the use in that?" Harry said loudly. "If, we're going to be attacked, it won't be in a –"

"_Hand, _Mr Potter!" sang Professor Umbridge.

Harry's hand flew into the air, Umbridge promptly turned her back on him, and my jaws slammed together.

Other people had raised their hands by now though, so she couldn't just toddle over to her desk.

"And your name is?" Professor Umbridge said.

"Dean Thomas."

"Well, Mr. Thomas?"

"Well, it's like Harry said, isn't it? If we're going to be attacked, it won't be risk free."

"I repeat," said Professor Umbridge, smiling in the most irritating way possible. "Do you expect to be attacked during my classes?"

"No, but-"

Professor Umbridge spoke loudly over him, drowning his words with that fake honeyed voice, Yeugh.

"I do not wish to criticise the way things have been run in this school, but you have been exposed to some very irresponsible wizards in this class, very irresponsible indeed- not to mention," she gave a nasty little laugh that raised the hairs at the back of my neck, "extremely dangerous half-breeds."

"If you mean Professor Lupin," Dean said angrily, "he was the best we ever-"

"_Hand, _Mr Thomas! As I was saying- you have been introduced to spells that have been complex, inappropriate to your age group and potentially lethal. You have been frightened into believing that you are likely to meet Dark Attacks every other day –"

"No we haven't," said Hermione, forgetting her hand, "we just-"

"_Your hand is not up, Miss Granger!"_

Hermione put up her hand and Professor Umbridge turned away.

"It is my understanding that my predecessor not only performed illegal curses in front of you, he actually performed them on you."

"Well, he turned out to be a maniac, didn't he?" Said Dean hotly. "Mind you, we still learnt loads."

"_Your hand is not up, Mr Thomas!" _Trilled Professor Umbridge.

"Now, it is the view of the Ministry that theoretical knowledge will be more than sufficient to get you through your examination, which, after all, is what school is all about. And your name is?"

"Ernest MacMillan, and isn't there a practical bit in our Defence Against the Dark Arts OWL? Aren't we meant to show that we can actually do the counter-curses and things?"

"As long as you have studied the theory enough, there is no reason why you should not be able to perform the spells under carefully controlled examination conditions," said Professor Umbridge dismissively.

"Without ever practising them beforehand?" said Ernest incredulously. "Are you telling us that the first time we'll get to do the spells will be during our exam?"

"I repeat, as long as you have studied the theory hard enough-"

I finally blew.

"That's BULL!" I screamed at the same time that Harry yelled "And what good's theory in the real world?"

Umbridge ignored me, and glared at Harry.

"This is school Mr Potter, not the real world," she said softly.

"So we're not supposed to be prepared for what's waiting for us out there?"

"There is nothing waiting for you out there, Mr Potter."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Who do you imagine wants to attack children like yourselves?" enquired Professor Umbridge.

"Hmm, let's think . . . " Harry said in a mock thoughtful voice. "Maybe . . . _Lord Voldemort?"_

Ron gasped; some girl uttered a small scream; Neville slipped sideways off his stool. Professor Umbridge was still staring at Harry, now with a grimly satisfied expression.

"Ten points from Gryffindor, Mr Potter."

The classroom went silent, but I well and truly lost it then.

"_WHAT?" _I yelled, standing up so suddenly my stool tipped over.

"There will be no shouting in my class, Miss -?"

"Holland, Elena Holland. And why exactly have you just deducted ten points from Gryffindor?" I said.

"Your hand-"

"I don't care that my hand isn't up! Answer the bloody question!"

Umbridge narrowed her beady eyes at me.

"Ten more points from Gryffindor. Now sit down Miss Holland," she said, and before I could tell her that I would sit when I bloody well wanted to, she continued in a low voice.

"Now, let me make a few things quite plain. You have been told that a certain Dark wizard has returned from the dead -"

"He wasn't dead," said Harry angrily, "but yeah, he's returned!"

"Mr-Potter-you-have-already-lost-your-house-ten-points-do-not-make-matters-worse-for-yourself," said Professor Umbridge all in one breath. If you asked me, she breathed too much.

"Now, as I was saying, you have been informed that a certain Dark wizard is at large once again. _This is a lie._"

"It is NOT a lie!" Harry and I shouted in unisen.

"I saw him, I fought him!" Harry continued.

"Detention, Mr Potter!" said Professor Umbridge triumphantly. "Tomorrow evening. Five o'clock. My office. I repeat-"

"You seem to repeat yourself a lot, the problem is you're either teaching us things we already know, or you're lying to us!" I said loudly.

"Detention Miss Holland! You and Mr Potter will both report to my office at Five o'clock tomorrow evening!"

I opened my mouth but Hermione caught my eye and shook her head sternly. I slowly sank onto my stool, which someone had kindly rebalanced for me, not once taking my eyes from the horrible pink toad in front of me. It wouldn't do to lose my house anymore points, seeing as I'd lost sixty already on my first day, but that didn't mean I wouldn't turn the woman into cockroach if she tried anything.

Professor Umbridge flattened her hair and continued, "As I was saying, _this is a lie. _The Ministry of Magic guarantees that you are not in danger from any Dark wizard. If you are still worried, by all means come and see me outside class hours. If someone is alarming you with fibs about reborn Dark wizards, I would like to hear about it. I am here to help. I am your friend. And now, you will kindly continue your reading. Page five, 'Basics for Beginners'."

Umbridge sat down at her desk, Harry rose from his seat. Everyone was staring at him; Seamus Finnegan looked half-scared, half-fascinated.

"Harry, no!" Hermione whispered warningly, tugging at the sleeves of his robes, but he jerked his arm away from her.

"So, according to you, Edward Diggory dropped dead of his own accord, did he?" Harry asked, his voice shaking with anger.

The row of Hufflepuff boys next to me stiffened, and the one sitting next to me turned anxiously to the god-like blonde on his right.

You could practically hear everyone's hearts beating faster from the lack of oxygen, as eyes flickered from Harry, to the teacher and back again.

"Edward Diggory's death was a tragic accident," said Professor Umbridge coldly.

"It was murder," said Harry, and I could see his clenched hands shaking. "Voldemort killed him and you know it," he said.

Professor Umbridge's face was quite devoid of any emotion. Then, very softly, in the most puke-worthy sweet voice I'd ever heard, she said, "come here, Mr Potter, dear."

Harry kicked his chair aside, and marched past Ron and Hermione to Professor Umbridge's desk. I watched carefully; I didn't trust this woman, and if she so much as raised her wand, I'd hex her into oblivion, behaviour be damned.

Professor Umbridge pulled out a sheet of pink parchment from her horrible pink handbag, and scribbled with her quill, hunching over so no one could see what she'd written. She rolled it up, tapped it with her wand, and handed it to Harry.

"Take this to Professor McGonagall, dear," said Professor Umbridge, holding the note out to Harry, who took it, spun on his heel and slammed out of the room without so much as a backward glance to the three of us.

"Now, you will all please read page five, 'Basics for Beginners'," said Umbridge. *

* * *

**= Circe was a Greek goddess of magic, as is Hecate, who will appear in a similar way sooner or later

* … * = I took this _almost_ directly from page 215 to 222 of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling so it is NOT all my own writing. No copyright infringement is intended, and I do not claim to own any of the characters with the exception of Elena Holland and her family, and her friends from out of school.

There's a little button with a yellow speech bubble and in blue, the word 'review' is written. pressing this button and typing words in the text box, and then posting this, will make me infinitely happy, and earn YOU a PREVIEW!


	5. 4 Lack of Direction, Jewellery and Scars

**Chapter Four**

Aha! Aren't you guys proud of me? I got the chapter up when I said I would! I tried to work out the times, so at the moment it should be around one in the morning for my American readers, who seem to be the vast majority. I can't really be sure of my maths though, so just let me know if I'm wrong. Here's part four, all edited and spanking new (kind of)! I could post play lists for each chapter, but you gotta let me know if you want 'em. Feedback is always welcome!

Moving on to Hogwarts!

* * *

**Lack of Direction, Jewellery and Vanishing Scars…**

**Elena**

By dinner everyone knew exactly what had gone down in DADA. Some people congratulated us like Fred and George, and others like the Patil twins whispered conspiringly at the end of the dinner table. I wasn't sure what was more irritating; the fact that I'd gotten ten points taken from Gryffindor _and _detention on my first day, or that every time I tried to put my fork in my mouth some irritating random giggled and moved the bench so that I missed my mouth. This meant I either dropped the fork back on my plate, or the food went to have a party on my jeans.

I was beginning to think it was all a conspiracy to starve me and make me cranky. The question was; who in their right mind wanted to get between me and my food? They had to be totally mad, or else

Eventually I held my plate under my mouth while I was eating. My mother would have thrown a fit, but I was hungry damn it!

_Ha! Take that conspirators! Nothing shall prevent me from eating! You hear me? Nothing!_

Whilst smugly eating my large piece of apple crumble, I noticed someone else having trouble getting food in their mouth. Harry's hands were shaking so much he couldn't even get it a few inches off the plate. Poor guy, detention is probably the last thing he needs. What with all the bad press and weird looks he was getting from the student body. It sure must be hard being Harry.

I began pondering what I could do to cheer him up, and then decided that pranking Umbridge would be the most successful way. Which meant…

"I'm going back to the common room, I'll see you guys later," I said once I'd devoured my food. No way I was letting this stuff go to waste.

They all nodded, and turned back to Harry.

As I sped down the halls, I realised I had no idea where I was going. Darn hallways that all look the sa-

"Miss Holland, there you are," said Professor McGonagall from behind me.

"I didn't do it! I swear!" I shrieked.

_Smooth Lena, she'll never suspect a thing._

Then realised that in fact I _hadn't_ done anything. Yet.

"Ah," she said with a curiously raised brow. Clearly she thought I was mental. "Professor Dumbledore would like to see you in his quarters now."

"But I didn't do anything!" I exclaimed.

_Yet._ I mentally tacked on.

"So you've said," she raised her brow further. "However he simply wishes to speak with you, not reprimand you."

"Oh. Okay, um so where is his office, study... thing?" I asked.

"It's just down the hallway to your left. Then you turn right at the bust of Baldrik the Babbling, go straight past the stain-glass window, right, left, left right, and then say 'exploding bon-bons' to the gargoyle."

Huh, Dumbledore had good taste in passwords.

"Um, oh-kay," I said, not wanting to sound stupid, but really having taken in none of her directions.

"Good girl, now off you go," she said, looking me expectantly.

"Uh, right," I said, going down the corridor. I tried to remember what she'd said.

Right at the Babbling bust? Or was it left? And then something about a strained window… what on earth was a strained window?

Needless to say I was lost within five turns… I'm not even sure whether I was supposed to have made five turns.

I cursed loudly in Russian; frustrated when I was faced with the same painting of some random monks with a large cellar of wine. Were monks even allowed to drink?

"Actually, my name's Aaron," said an amused voice from behind me, making me jump and reach for my wand instinctively.

_Hey! It was Cute Charms guy! _

Wow, I didn't notice before, but his eyes were… purple? The only things that I can remember which had purple eyes were some kind of rare Faeries… Cool.

I laughed, and walked towards him, holding out my hand.

"I don't believe we've officially met, I'm Lena."

"Aaron," he said, shaking my hand. "But then I just told you that."

I laughed again.

"So what are you doing here, Lena? Shouldn't you be at dinner?" he asked.

"I was, but now I'm supposed to be in Professor Dumbledore's office."

He raised an eyebrow, "In trouble already?" he asked with an air of mischief.

"No, not yet at least," I grinned at him.

"Well, it'd be my pleasure to take you there," he said.

"Thanks."

He began leading me down a corridor, which, surprise surprise, looked identical to the one I'd just come down.

"So, I was under the impression that your name was Elena, am I wrong, or are you just giving me a fake name so I can't find you?" he said with a grin.

I smiled back, "no, I just prefer being called Lena. It's… I don't know, it's just that only randoms and boring people call me Elena. I like to differentiate between the two."

"Ah, good to know I make such a good first impression," Aaron said.

"Well, how could you not? Funny, witty, very cool eyes," I said.

"I know," he smirked.

I rolled my eyes, "modest too."

"Yeah, that's me; Mr Modest they call me."

"Really?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No," he laughed, "actually they call me Aaron. Or Smith. Or Smithy, and AJ. But that's strictly for family only," he said.

"AJ?"

He wrinkled his nose, "Aaron James."

"That's not bad! We call my cousin Yura YOU for short."

"You?"

"Yup, Y-O-U, for Yura Oksana Ulana."

"Oh Merlin, how does she sign everything?" he asked, trying very hard not to laugh.

"Oh she changed it the second she hit seventeen. Now she's just Yura."

"So I'm guessing you're Russian? What with names like that," he said.

"Half. My dad's British."

"Any terrible names on that side?"

"Nah, they're boring. No offence," I added.

"None taken. We are a pretty bland bunch by comparison."

"Oh I don't know, my dad's family beat my mom's at the annual Tea Day every year."

"Tea Day?" he laughed.

"Yeah, we have tons of competitions, who makes the best cup, who can drink the most without a bathroom break, who can do the most bitter-jasmine tea shots, but my personal favourite is playing Quidditch while balancing a tea cup on their head without spilling."

"You're absolutely mad," he laughed.

"Yeah, but it's the most fun."

"So when is this Tea Day anyway?" he asked.

"The tenth of May."

"Well, maybe we can have on here after OWLs," said Aaron.

"That would be great! But I'm obligated to warn you, I haven't been beaten at tea-shots since I was nine."

He laughed, wrinkling his nose and throwing his head back; it was infectious.

A few more moments passed as we laughed our way down the corridor when we came to a really big statue of a gargoyle he stopped. It was really quite realistic. The gargoyle I mean.

"Well, this is you're stop, I've got to head back to the library, Charms homework you know," he pulled a face.

"Good luck, and thanks so much for bringing me here," I said.

"No problem. See you around, Lena."

"You too, Aaron," I said with a wave as he departed.

"Now, what was that password…?" I wondered aloud. "It was… some really cool sweet… um, mum loves them... oh! Exploding bon-bons!"

The gargoyle sprang away, revealing a door.

Inside was a huge room with wood panelling and many silver gadgets whistling and spinning; it was rather dizzying to watch. There were wonderful Persian carpets on the floor, a fire crackled at the hearth, and there were at least twenty portraits dozing on the walls.

Scanning the paintings, I recognised my great great great great grandmother, Evelyn Holland (my dad's side, obviously), who had actually been a headmistress here. In fact, there had apparently been a long line of Hollands at Hogwarts, but then the family had moved, and it had been ten years before another Holland walked these halls; my dad.

Yep, my family was huge.

"Ah, Miss Holland, I was wondering where you'd gotten to," came a voice from my right.

Dumbledore sat behind a massive oak desk, his hands forming a steeple in front of him. Today his robes were of a kind of burnt umber with gold flowers and vines, like morning glory.

"Sorry Professor, I got lost," I admitted, hurrying forward.

"That's alright, have a seat won't you?" he asked, gesturing to a pink chintz chair.

I plopped myself down in it, and looked at him expectantly.

"You are of course wondering why I have asked you here," he said.

"Well, yes, I was rather."

"The truth is Elena- may I call you Elena?"

"Um, I'd prefer just Lena if it's alright with you," I said.

He nodded, "as I was saying Lena, your family asked me to have you here today," he said earnestly. I rolled my eyes, grinning to myself.

_Should have known, they always worry too much about me._

"That is not to say of course that I object to you being here, Evelyn has told me much about you," he continued, motioning his head towards my relation's painting, where she was pretending to sleep, but her one brown eye was looking at the scene, and she seemed to be smiling.

"Hi grandmother Evelyn," I said, waving at her.

She carried on pretending.

"Are they always this tired?" I asked.

"Yes, they do enjoy sleeping," said Dumbledore with a smile, his blue eyes twinkling.

"How dull," I said, looking around again.

"Sometimes, yes," he said.

There was so much to look at; the many silver machines, mirrors with engraved patterns, the beautiful gleaming strands of wood within the furniture, rich curtains and carpets, an empty perch I assumed to belong to a bird, and then there was the fantastic view from the window. A crescent moon glowing, stars shining as brightly as new Sickles against the bark royal blue satin sky, a few wispy grey clouds swimming around.

Without realising it I'd gravitated towards the open window, leaning out and watching the tree tops shivering in the cool breeze, which carried a strange and mysterious smell of earth, dew, warmth and a sweet flower.

I may belong to a world of magic, but it was moments like this that I knew my life, my world, was truly enchanted.

Dumbledore cleared his throat.

I swivelled around, blushing horribly, startled by the sound and my own behaviour.

"Oh I'm sorry! I don't know what happened, I just, sort of found myself over here and..." I trailed off.

"It's quite alright Lena, I understand. The view has often pulled me from my work before," he said kindly.

I nodded and looked at my feet.

"Your parents also sent you a package; it came just a few minutes ago."

He pulled a small black velvet pouch from his robes, and put it in my palm.

"There's a letter as well," he said, handing me a piece of ivory paper. I flipped the envelope over and saw my family crest; a shield bearing a diagonal stripe, with stars and an old crown encircling a dagger. On one side was a unicorn, a lion on the other. Below was a banner declaring the motto we lived by; _unity, honour and freedom_. This seal was pressed into gold wax, and I smiled as my finger skimmed over it.

"Thank you," I said, looking up at the elderly wizard.

"No trouble at all, now I suggest you get off to your common room before you're missed anymore," he said.

"Okay, goodnight Professor, sleep well," I said, then I turned to my great great great great grandmother, "goodnight Grandmother Evelyn," I said.

Then I turned and went through the door.

**Third Person**

Dumbledore watched as Elena left his office, noticing how everything seemed to be slightly duller without her. He sighed and went to shut the window.

"I told you; she's a marvellous girl, very special too," said Evelyn Holland.

"Yes, she is indeed Evelyn," he said, turning to the walls of former Hogwarts heads.

"Amazing creature, quite fascinating," said Phineas Nigellus, stroking his sharp black beard.

"Quite, quite, fairly odd though," said Dilys.

"I beg your pardon," said Evelyn crossly, turning in her arm chair to narrow her eyes at Dilys.

"I only meant that she is a little… extraordinary," said Dilys delicately.

"Of course she is," said Evelyn with a sniff.

"Now now, no one means to insult Elena," Dumbledore, who had conjured up a pot of tea for himself.

As the heads discussed the girl who had just left the room, Dumbledore nodded slowly to himself, knowing that he had been right.

"I shall need to speak to Annika and Peter, Evelyn," he said.

"Certainly, I will inform them at once," said the old headmistress, striding from her chair and disappearing into her frame.

Talk then immediately began on the odd things about Elena.

"Did you see the way her eyes glowed when she looked out the window?" asked Everard.

"Yes! I thought it was only I who had noticed!" cried Augustina.

"Do you suppose she knows, Dumbledore?" questioned Everard.

"No, her parents made sure of it. They believed it to be too dangerous for her. And rightly so," said Dumbledore.

"What will you do? Surely she must begin to train?" said Bestinda.

Evelyn appeared back in her painting.

"They are on their way, they shall arrive by Floo powder," she said.

"Thank you Evelyn," said Dumbledore.

The current headmaster vanished his tea, and sat back in his chair.

"For what it is worth, Evelyn, I believe Elena is without a doubt the most unique child I have ever met," said Dumbledore

"Thank you Albus," said Evelyn Holland.

There was a whooshing sound, and Annika and Peter Holland stepped out from the fireplace, and greeted Dumbledore.

"Have a seat my friends, there is much to discuss. Firstly you should know that I gave the necklace to her as you instructed..."

**Cedric**

Aaron entered the common room with a very large grin, a grin that could only mean one thing; he had a new 'project' as he called it.

Justin, Ernie and I were trying to get started on Binns foot-long essay on giant wars by the window, but failing miserably because Pince had thrown us out of the library for being too loud, which really wasn't fair considering that I'd only sneezed.

"Uh oh, I know that look, who's the poor girl this time?" I asked, setting down my quill, Ernie did the same, probably glad of an excuse.

"What look? And what do you mean 'poor girl'?" said Aaron, coming over and leaning on the table.

"You know exactly what look, and I feel sorry for the girl because you flirt shamelessly with them for a week, have two dates and dump them," I said.

"Hey, I'm not that fickle. I flirt shamelessly for two weeks," said Aaron.

"And he does occasionally have third date," said Justin, giving up on his essay too.

"That's true," I admitted. "But who is it this time?" I asked.

"Guess," said Aaron, clearly enjoying every minute of this.

"Okay, is it… Moaning Myrtle?" I asked.

Aaron punched my shoulder.

"Okay okay," I said, still chuckling a bit. "Is it that blonde Ravenclaw from Herbology?"

"Who, Luna Lovegood?" asked Justin.

"No the other one, the one with the sister in seventh year," Ernie said.

"No," said Aaron.

"Is it… Daisy Humbertoll?" guessed Justin.

"No," said Aaron.

"Is it… er… One of the Patil twins?" I asked.

"No, he did those two in first and third year, remember?" said Ernie.

"Oh yeah, I forgot that. Is it… Mary Stevenson?" I asked

"No, you two are really pathetic guessers," said Aaron.

"Well give us a clue then," said Justin.

"She's not in Slytherin," said Aaron.

"Well that narrows it down," I scoffed.

"Alright fine, she's in Gryffindor," said Aaron.

"Hermione Granger," said Justin.

"What? Why would I go for her? I know you've had a little thing for her-"

"I do not!" said Justin, beginning to blush.

"Is it Alicia Perkson?" I asked hastily.

"No! Really you three are quite hopeless!" said Aaron, beginning to laugh.

"Well, go on, tell us then," said Ernie.

Aaron looked at us for a bit, and then grinned widely.

"Elena Holland," he said.

Our jaws went slack.

"How did-" I began.

"Met her in the corridor, she got lost on her way to Dumbledore's office," said Aaron.

"Why was she going there?" asked Justin.

"She didn't know, but I think it might have had something to do with what happened in Defence today.

My jaw clenched on it's own accord.

Aaron noticed and his grin faded.

"Sorry mate, I know it's got to be tough-"

"It's okay Aaron," I said, waving it away. It had been a good few months since my brother had come out of the maze; I shouldn't feel like this anymore.

"So what happened when you saw her?" Justin asked, tactfully changing the subject.

"Oh not much, we just talked," said Aaron.

"Oh come on, tell us what you said then!" said Ernie.

Aaron smiled and launched into the story with abandon.

"She seems really nice," said Justin afterwards.

"Yeah, really fit too," said Aaron.

"Is that all you think about?" I asked.

"No, sometimes I think about how fit I am," he joked.

"Well your most good-looking self has got a ton of homework," I said.

"Ah, pity, but then I suppose I need to dazzle you with my genius as well," he said, grabbing a chair and pulling out his own parchment.

The rest of the evening continued in the way it always did, and slowly the ache in my chest at the mention of my brother eased and I forgot about it.

**Elena**

I entered the common room to find that my friends had all gone to bed. I hadn't realized I'd been gone that long… But I suppose there had been getting lost, finding Aaron, getting to Dumbledore's office, being there, and then getting lost at least three more times on the way back here… I sighed and went to get my books from my room, creeping in and out so as not to wake the girls who had already gone to bed (Hermione included, wow they went to bed early here). I went back down stairs to get started on my homework.

First, however, there was the matter of the letter and my present. I knew it was better to look at the letter first but… I loosened the draw strings of the purse, and tipped it upside down into my palm. It was a thin gold chain off which there dangled a plain gold ring, a small circular locket with my initials engraved, and then a small replica of the Gryffindor lion. Curiously, I opened the locket to discover it had a tiny picture of my parents, and a very old looking stone that looked like a white opal… For about a minute I looked at how the light brought out hundreds and thousands of tiny rainbows and flecks of colours, then smiled and closed it before investigating the ring. It was just a plain, pale gold band, and on the inside the words 'my everything' were engraved in elegant flowing script. The lion was in a warmer tone of gold, and had a little heart shaped ruby on the other side. I grinned at the thought that had gone into it.

I brought out the letter and peeled off the seal, sticking it inside my new locket, wanting to save it for some reason. It was written in my dad's neat handwriting; very different from my mom's flamboyant curled script.

_Dear Lena, _

_Now that you have thoroughly inspected your present, _

I grinned at how well my parents knew me.

_We thought we might tell you what they all mean. The lion is of course because we heard you got into Gryffindor,_

I briefly wondered how they'd found out, and then remembered that I'd told them that in my letter.

_The locket is to remind you of who you are, the stone is a family heirloom. We would like you to wear this at all times, as it has lucky properties and is very rare. Lastly, the ring is what I gave to your mother when we were dating (she says to tell you that it was on our three year anniversary)._

_Good luck for this new school year, we know that you will do us proud just as you always do. Be good, but not too good, after all, life has to be interesting._

_All our love, _

_Mama and Dad_

I grinned to myself, and carefully folded the letter and put it to one side before putting the necklace on.

Around an hour and a half later I was mostly finished with my homework, though it had been fairly easy since it was just revision_. _Slowly I packed up my things, and trudged upstairs. I tucked the letter away in one of the pockets of my trunk, dropped my clothes in there, pulled on my pajamas -blue boxers with little sheep on them with an old over sized t-shirt that said 'born free, now I'm expensive'- before getting into bed and falling asleep pretty much immediately, but not before I made a mental note to get more Gryffindor-ish PJ's.

* * *

"Lena," came a soft voice.

"Mph," I replied.

"Come on Lena, you have to get up," said the evil voice.

I groaned 'mph'-ed again, and pulled my quilt up further.

"Come on! You need to get up!"

I didn't budge.

Someone struggled to take my sheets off. Ha! They had underestimated my experience with such evil people and their wicked ways of attempting to wake me up.

The voice huffed, and I smiled to myself, eyes still closed.

"Just remember, you brought this on yourself," said the evil person.

Suddenly a huge weight crashed down on me, and my sheets were as heavy as lead and … wet?

I was up alright, and I was out to avenge myself and my poor sodden bed.

The covers went flying and Hermione's surprised face came into view.

**Harry**

There was a terrible roar from upstairs, followed by a loud shriek, and then there were heavy thuds and pounding noises. A few seconds later a screaming Hermione came flying down the stairs, Ron and I stood up, but a second later Elena came racing into the room, making awful animalistic cries.

"Get back here Hermione Granger!" she screeched, chasing Hermione around the common room, arms in front of her, hands contorted into claws.

Hermione screamed as Elena leapt over a table and cornered her. She whipped out her wand from where it had been stuck in her ponytail, it made a graceful arc as it moved at a nerve-wracking speed into the perfect position of attack.

"Tarantallegra!" shrieked Elena.

Hermione's legs immediately began doing a frantic jig, somewhere between the can-can and a tap-dance.

Elena seemed placated, stuck her wand back in her hair, and calmly went upstairs, muttering something about Hermione having at least remembered the school motto.

A few minutes after she'd disappeared, Hermione managed to reach her wand and reversed the charm.

"What the bloody hell was that about?" asked Fred, still laughing a bit.

"I woke her up," said Hermione, sweeping her hair away from her face.

"And she did that?" asked Ron.

"Well, to get her up I dampened her bed sheets," said Hermione.

"More like drenched them," called Elena from upstairs.

Fred and George sniggered.

"Well she was going to be late," said Hermione defensively.

"It's half past seven! I don't have to be ready until nine!" called Elena.

"But you take forever to get dressed, and you still have to eat," said Hermione.

Elena appeared at the foot of the stairs, wearing the same 'uniform' as yesterday, but there was just a plain white long sleeved shirt when there'd been a shirt yesterday.

"I do not! Well, not when I do it by magic anyway."

Elena looked at herself in the mirror, and turned to Hermione, "is it just me, or is this neckline a little high?"

"Make it a v-neck," said Ginny from her seat by the fire.

Elena flicked her wand and the neckline became a triangular one.

"Oh come on, that's just as high," said Fred from the corner.

"Yeah, do all us lads a favour and show a little skin," came George.

Elena rolled her eyes and glared. "Very funny, but in case you haven't noticed it FREEZING out there," she said, gesturing at the window where rain was brutally pummelling the ground.

"Eh, just wait until end of October," said Ginny.

Elena's eyes widened in horror, "it gets colder than this?"

"Of course! This is England darling," said Fred, coming over and putting his arm around Elena.

"And in England, you freeze your arse off seventy percent of the time," said George, taking over Elena's other shoulder.

Elena groaned and shook her head, "well then I'm going to need a double espresso shot this morning, can someone show me the way to breakfast?"

"We'd be delighted," said Fred and George, immediately escorting Elena from the room.

"Come on Hermione, we'd better go save Lena from the twin Casanovas," said Ginny.

"Coming," said Hermione, although she .

"Well, breakfast?" I said, turning to Ron.

"I'm starved," said Ron, "hope there's more peaches today."

Hagrid was still missing from the house table, and the only thing to brighten my day was, as Ron put it, 'no Snape'.

**Cedric**

"Ah, there she is," said Aaron.

"There's who?" asked Cho as she came and sat next to me. Her friends Marrieta, Brittany and Tiffany followed suite.

"Er, morning Cho," I said.

"Morning Ceddy-boo," she said, laying her head on my shoulder and putting her hand on my lower back.

Huh, it seemed that she had gotten rid of her shyness. Interesting, yet somehow not surprising.

Aaron struggled not to laugh, and Justin looked like he feared for my girlfriend's mental health.

"Who were you talking about Aaron?" asked Tiffany, looking at Aaron as if he were some sparkling piece of jewellery.

"Er, Elena. Elena Holland. You know, the new girl," said Aaron, leaning away from Tiffany.

I fleetingly wondered if he'd gone out with Tiffany before.

"Oh Ceddy-boo, don't eat that! It makes your breath smell," said Cho, putting aside my plate of kippers.

"Have some of this instead," she said, scooping a few spoonfuls of plain white yogurt into a bowl, adding pieces of grapefruit and brazil nuts.

"Er, thanks," I said.

Now, I wasn't exactly the healthiest person, and I'd seen enough of my mom's diet meals to know what to steer clear of, and so far my 'breakfast', if you could call it that, was made up of all her favourite slimming 'foods'.

"Well go on, eat up," she said.

I took hold of my spoon, not wanting to offend her, and brought some of it to my mouth.

It tasted… crunchy and bitter and pasty and sour and something else equally unpleasant.

"There, now isn't that better than smelly kippers?" she asked sweetly. Then she turned her attention to Aaron. "Now Aaron, you mentioned Elena Holland?"

"Yes, I did," said Aaron, happily eating his kippers. I think he was purposefully eating in slow motion.

"Well I daresay that she'll be easy for you," said Cho.

"Why?"

"Well word is that not only does she come from Beauxbatons, but she's a brassy little slut."

"What?" I spluttered.

"Oh come on Ceddy-boo, everyone knows that the girls at Beauxbatons are practically trained to unbutton shirts, and if that's not enough proof, look at those tight pants she's wearing!"

"Actually, they're called skinny jeans," said Justin.

We all looked at him.

"What? I have a sister, and she's always wearing the things."

"Well, either way she doesn't seem like a slut to me," said Aaron.

"Oh?" said Cho, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I spoke to her yesterday, she seemed fun."

"Yeah, and Professor Flitwick loves her," said Justin.

"I heard she was part Veela," said Brittany conspiratorially.

"Well, there you go," said Cho triumphantly.

"But I think it was her aunt or something," I said.

Cho frowned at me.

"Morning," said Ernie as he sat down beside Justin.

"Ernie, maybe you can talk some sense into them; what do you think of Elena Holland?" said Cho.

"Elena? She seems fun, good-looking too," said Ernie, pinching the last two kippers. Why must they taunt me so?

"Ugh! You're all hopeless and blinded by the Veela blood in her!" said Cho, who then got up and walked away in a huff, her friends followed like sheep.

"What was that all about?" asked Ernie.

"Cho's jealous of Elena because all the lads are paying more attention to her now," said Aaron.

"How do you know that?" I asked.

"Well for one thing; it's Cho," Ernie and Justin nodded, as if admitting that it was a very true fact. "And for another, I know women," said Aaron.

"You know women?" I said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, spend most of my time with them don't I?" he said.

"Or thinking about them," said Ernie.

"Or dreaming about them," said Justin.

"Alright, alright, I get the picture," said Aaron. "But bottom line is; Ceddy-boo over here has to turn things up a notch with Cho, or we'll all suffer."

"How d'you mean?" I asked, pulling back my plate of kippers.

"We'll be subjected to her little shows, remember when Fleur was here? Cho practically made a production of sitting down, and it'll be even worse this time because Elena's not a snob like Fleur, and actually talks to people," said Aaron, grabbing a halved orange.

"Hey, anyone know if they're any peaches today?" asked Ernie.

"Nah, already checked," said Aaron.

"Damn," said Ernie, who had been craning his neck at the Gryffindor table. "Hey," he said, tapping Aaron's arm incessantly, "she's looking over this way!"

"Well calm down! Don't wet yourself," said Aaron.

"What do we do?" asked Justin, looking a little panicked.

"We wave of course!" said Aaron, who then lifted his hand and gave a kind of half salute to Elena, touching his relaxed hand to his temple.

I turned to see Elena smile and start to get up.

"Merlin! She's coming over here!" said Ernie, looking as excited as Cho when Madame Malkin's was having a sale.

"Remain calm men, breathe, and stop looking like you're about to be hexed!" he added to Justin.

Elena made her way over, sort of gliding in between people, and finally came to stop just beside me. She smelled of pink flowers and… lemons? Maybe oranges?

"Hey Aaron, thanks again for helping me last night, I would have been totally lost without you," she said with a smile.

"Ah no problem, what did Dumbledore want?" asked Aaron, completely at ease, while Ernie was staring and Justin was very busy examining his eggs.

"Oh, he just wanted to give me a package my parents sent over, its this necklace, see?" she said, fishing a gold chain out of her shirt and holding it forward so we could see. Aaron stood up and leaned over the table to have a better look. Although I doubted it was the necklace he was looking at, knowing Aaron, but most likely a similar area.

"Very nice," he said.

"Thanks, it's a bunch of family heirlooms," she said, letting it fall back and nestle at her sternum.

"Oh, these are my friends," said Aaron, having realised that Ernie's staring had become fairly creepy. "Ernie, Justin and Cedric," he said, gesturing to each in turn.

"Pleasure to meet you," she said, extending her hand to each of us. "I'm really terrible with names though, so you'll have to forgive me," she said.

She had a tiny hand, with soft gold tinged skin, and a strange feeling came when my own hand engulfed it, like she'd shocked me.

"Er, my great grandmother seems to be influencing Ernie," said Elena, after Ernie failed to shake her hand and just went on staring at her.

"Ah, he's alright," said Justin, who seemed to have recovered from his lapse of consciousness.

"Well, when he snaps out of it, won't you tell him I'm sorry I surprised him? The stupid Veela blood is really annoying when I meet new people."

"How does it work anyway? Last year we had a girl whose grandmother was a Veela, and she was, well, very startling," I asked, curious as to how she could be so near normal when Fleur had been… different. Not that Elena wasn't beautiful, she was amazingly so, but Fleur had had this pull around her that prevented you from looking away. Elena's was much less… forceful, but tempted and coaxed you rather then clutched at your eyeballs.

"I can't say I know, but my dad thinks it's because the blood went through my mother and all her sister's, and so maybe it was weaker in me," she said, looking at me with earnest eyes, kind of resembling the colour of the sky- a washed out blue-grey.

"Lena, we'll see you back in the common room," said Hermione Granger, putting her hand gently on Elena's shoulder.

"Okay, I'll be there in a sec," she said, then turned back to us. "It was great to meet you guys, I'll see you around," she said.

"You will, we've got Charms first lesson," said Aaron.

"Oh, well, see you then, provided I don't get lost on the way," Elena laughed, winked at Aaron, before turning away and skipping, literally _skipping _off with Hermione.

"Wow," breathed Justin.

"Yeah, she's something isn't she?" said Aaron proudly.

"Yeah," I said. "Really something…"

**Elena**

After Charms, I was on a total high, and not just from the coffee- which had been beyond glorious. Aaron had looked absolutely gorgeous curing the lesson, and making me laugh with funny faces he pulled or messing with a really irritating boy's head by moving his chair away every time he tried to sit down. The lesson itself was so much fun because we were learning how to make objects move to our will, so Hermione and I soon had spoon and a fork doing the tango across the desk. Of course my dirty mind came into play, so Hermione tried to give me the Heimlich manoeuvre when she saw I couldn't breathe. Of course she didn't know I was laughing too hard to breathe because I was thinking about the vast innuendos attached to the utensils.

However the bliss had to be shattered at some point; and at five o'clock, Harry and I were outside the Pink Beast's liar.

Even from our spot behind the closed door, I could smell the terrible cloying perfume, it was slowly coating my nostrils until I could hardly breathe it was so repulsively strong.

Then the door opened, and the piglet herself smiled half-disappointedly. T'was as if she was half hoping we wouldn't turn up, so she could punish us even more. This just thickened my resolve to get revenge sooner, and in a far more terrible manner than before.

She held the door open for us, and gestured with her pudgy hand that we come in.

"Now," he said, in that artificial sweetener voice of hers, "I want you to write some lines for me."

I snorted. Wow, I'm so delicate. NOT.

"Is there a problem, Miss Holland?"

"No, not at all Professor Umbridge," I said, batting my eyelashes and looking as sweet and innocent as tiny little kitten.

_Die in a hole please._

The Podgy One was not convinced. Maybe she could read minds.

I screamed in my mind to see if she'd flinch. Nope; my thoughts were safe.

Harry and I sat down at the desks, which were on opposite sides of the room, mine facing the glass case of painted plates, Harry's the door.

"Now, Mr Potter, I want you to write 'I must not tell lies', and as for you, Miss Holland, I want you to write 'I will respect my teachers'."

"How many times?" I asked.

"Oh, as many as it takes for the message to sink in, and you will be using some rather special quills of mine," she added sweetly.

"You haven't given us any ink," said Harry dully.

"Oh, you won't be needing ink." And with that, she sat down behind her desk, and got on with her little uninteresting life, scribbling in some-or other pink paged book.

I started out with the first line. Oddly enough, my hand felt a slight twinge, as if I'd just stabbed it with the quill. Strange.

I heard Harry take a sudden breath through his teeth. At this my head whipped around to see what the problem was.

"Eyes on your own work, Miss Holland," said a very smug looking Umbridge.

I did as I was told, but tried to catch a glimpse of his reflection in the glass of the cabinet.

Another twinge, but far more painful- an almost searing sensation. I looked at my hand, only to discover that the words 'I will respect my teachers' had been carved into the flesh, before vanishing, and leaving no trace they'd ever been there.

_So that's her game, is it? Well, we'll just see how long this lasts…_

I clenched my hand into a fist, and then carried on with my lines, trying to press very lightly on the paper, but it made no difference.

After about five lines, I'd stop, take a breath, check and see that Harry was okay, and then carry on. After about the fourth time I'd repeated this, I noticed that Umbridge had put away her pink book, and was instead marking essays. Gold lettering shone on the spine of the book-

_Hello, what do we have here? _

I stared intently at the glass in the cabinet, willing it to make the word clearer. After a few seconds I managed to make out the script, and it made my pulse quicken, about a millions thoughts and plans whizzed through my head.

'Diary' it read.

Well well well, the Pink Beast had a diary, and knowing her sort, it'll be full of her inner most vile and horrendous thoughts and schemes.

Perfect.

Now all I had to do was get hold of it… I smiled to myself.

* * *

_Professor Umbridge, you have just signed your own death warrant. _

Sooo... what are we thinking so far? Reviews please! All reviewers WILL get a preview!

Here's some 'food for thought' something that I sort of kidnapped from a fantastic authoress called Vamp-by-Night, Check out her stories!

Do you like the dirty humour?

Are you as cranky as Lena in the mornings?

How should Hermione wake Lena up, seeing as it's a very dangerous activity?

And what was you're favourite/least favourite part of the story so far?


	6. 5 New Arrivals

**Chapter Five**

This chapter is dedicated to Callie-Paige, who has not only reviewed every single chapter in this story, but totally kicked my butt into gear and given me a high for the past few days. Go Callie! We looooooove you! This chapter is actually disgustingly long, just for you!

So here we have the next instalment, now of course I must apologise PORFUSELY for the wait and for this chapter, but I've rewritten and fixed it up- writer's block doesn't even begin to describe what I went through with this. The next two chapters will be up within the hour :)

Once again, sorry for the wait!

* * *

**New Arrivals…**

**Harry**

I'd not been able to sleep at all the night before; there were too many things to think about. Too many things to worry about. All of these things were of course beyond my control and I could do very little or nothing about them.

After lying awake for what seemed like hours, twisting in my sheets and unable to find any peace, I'd untangled myself and slumped down to the common room. In my favourite chair by the fire, things were no less frustrating. Hagrid was still missing, but it was a few days until we had care of Magical creatures with him, and he surely wouldn't miss that, would he? Then there was Umbridge and her constant insistence that I was a liar. What was worse was that everyone believed her. After all this time, all the signs, all the stupid gawking at me because I was 'The Boy Who Lived', they didn't believe me. I didn't understand it.

Before the Triwizard Championship, everyone had been more than willing to believe Dobby could lay golden eggs if I'd told them. Now they'd be doubtful if I told them Snape had greasy hair.

I heard shuffling and turned to see Ron walking over to me with his shoulders hunched and his hands shoved in his pockets.

He looked up at me and grunted a greeting before sitting down heavily in the chair beside me. I wasn't sure whether I wanted him there, but it was nice to know he cared enough to come and find me. We sat there and watched the shadows shrink slowly back against the walls, waiting, it seemed, for everyone to come down and break the silence. Outside in the grey and misty morning a light breeze picked up and we heard a small crash and raised voices.

Presently Hermione came downstairs, along with a very disgruntled looking Lena. Come to think of it, Hermione didn't look too pleased either.

"What's got you two so upset?" asked Ron.

Elena looked at him with baleful eyes, "Hermione woke me up."

"Elena broke my alarm clock beyond repair," said Hermione.

"When I break something, I want it to _stay _broken," Elena said with a shrug and a small smirk. "Besides," she huffed at Hermione's unimpressed expression, "I said I'd buy you a new one."

"That's not the point," said Hermione. "How are you going to get to class on time if you can't even get up without hexing someone?"

"It was only a jinx," said Elena, scowling and crossing her arms.

"Parvati has slippers sprouting from her ears!"

Elena shrugged, "she got in the way."

Both girls huffed and turned away from each other, and we trekked down to the Great Hall in silence

The post owls came swooping in, and a peculiar one came gliding towards us. As its feathers flashed slightly in the sunlight that was streaming through the windows, I thought the owl must have been wrapped up in aluminium foil.

This was not the case however, as it landed neatly on the coffee pot, swaying a little, but regaining balance quickly. Elena giggled and the owl looked at her almost disapprovingly.

She rolled her eyes, grinning at the bird and taking the letter from its offered leg.

"Lena, is everything you own strange?" asked Ron.

Elena cocked her head to the side and raised a brow.

"What he means to say," began Hermione, grudgingly coming to Ron's rescue- as usual. "Is that so far everything we've seen of yours is extraordinary, even by wizarding standards."

Elena smiled proudly, "well then yes, everything of mine _is _strange in some way." She turned to the bird, which was sitting expectantly on the coffee pot, fed it a scrap of bacon from her plate, kissed its beak, and waved it off.

Ron shrugged and went back to his eggs, while Hermione looked at him with a somewhat exasperated expression. Just the normal routine. For a few moments all that could be heard was the gentle bubble of morning chatter, the scraping as cutlery met crockery, and of course chewing. Ron's very loud chewing.

Elena let out a shrill scream that sounded something like 'EEEP!' and knocked over her cup of pumpkin juice. The peaceful bubble was shattered entirely

"Lena! What's wrong? Did someone jinx you?" asked Hermione in alarm, while Lavender shrieked as the juice dripped onto her lap. It was weird how girls changed their moods so fast.

"Oh my Godric, Hermioneeeeee!" squealed Elena, completely oblivious to Lavender. "Look! Look at this! My best friend Allie might be transferring to Hogwarts! Oh my Godric, I'm so excited!" Elena was flapping the letter in Hermione's face, her own split by a huge smile that nearly knocked you out with its brightness.

For the next three days Elena was bouncing around like a rabbit with a cheering charm, the only times when she wasn't grinning like a loon was during Defence and in the mornings, when Hermione tried all manner of ways to wake her up nicely- all without success. So it came as a great shock to all when on the day of Allie's expected arrival, Elena was up with everyone else and dancing around the common room, her ipod plugged in as she showed Hermione how to do the Time Warp.

**Cedric**

"Wake up!" shouted Aaron.

My ears rang and I made a very poor attempt to punch my best friend, who had just leaned away from my ear.

"Aaron, next time you wake me up, please remember I'd like to retain my hearing," I grumbled.

"I've been trying to wake you up for the past five minutes."

"Or in reality, you poked me, and I didn't jump out of bed," I said, rubbing my eyes and sitting up.

"Precisely," said Aaron with a grin. "Now hurry up, I'm planning to start the hunt today."

"And by hunt, you mean the seduction of Elena Holland."

"Correct again, can't imagine why you didn't make Ravenclaw. Now get dressed," Aaron said, chucking my clothes at my face.

I rolled my eyes, and did as the general commanded. There was no stopping Aaron when he'd set his sights on something, especially a girl.

"You too?" asked Justin, who'd somehow managed to put his jumper over his pants.

"Yeah, er, Justin, you might want to reconsider the placement of your jumper."

Justin looked down, and seemed just as puzzled as I was about how he'd managed to put his legs through the sleeves.

"Trying to start a new trend, Justin?" asked Aaron as he walked past us.

"Har har," said Justin. "I blame you."

"Well I'll blame you if I miss seeing Elena on the stair case!" said Aaron, his eyes going a rather dark plum. His faerie blood made it easy to tell his mood by the colour of his eyes.

Zach poked his nose around the door; of course _he_ was fully clothed and looking as neat as any prefect should. Damn him. I was in no mood to be patient to the irritating little prick. He took one look at Justin, snorted, and started looking superior. Double damn him.

Just then Ernie burst into the room, knocking Zach over.

"Hey!" said Zach from the floor.

Ernie looked at him and then back at us.

"Guys," he panted. "There… are… peaches… today."

I have never seen the Hufflepuff boys get dressed so fast. The usually friendly atmosphere was shattered in the scramble to get to the door. I'd have liked to have said that I wasn't part of it, but that would be a lie. In my defence, I liked peaches too.

"OI!" shouted Aaron. "At this rate she'll have left by the time we get down there, so just move already!"

They moved. I sometimes wish I had Aaron's commanding power. Even the Quidditch team seemed to ignore me sometimes, and I was the bloody captain!

Today was unseasonably warm, as it had been for the past few days, only about ten times more so. By the time I was seated at Hufflepuff's table, I'd thrown off my robes and rolled up my sleeves.

Elena wasn't there yet, and so every eye was on the door. We heard a feminine laugh as Cho and her posse entered, thinking everyone had been waiting for them.

Cho seemed to have taken the warm weather as a good omen, and worn the shortest skirt I'd ever seen, the highest heels imaginable, and her tightest shirt. I wasn't sure whether to stare open-mouthed or look away and blush on her behalf.

She smiled and waved at me before turning to her table and sitting down. Strange, she generally had breakfast with me. Oh well, I wasn't complaining; maybe today I'd get a proper breakfast!

"Where is she?" asked Ernie.

"How should I know?" asked Aaron irritably. He had been unable to meet Elena on her way down to breakfast as the crowd had forced him to literally 'go with the flow'.

The doors opened once again, and the Gryffindors trooped in, and with them, Elena Holland came… dancing into the room. Literally dancing. She had one of those Muggle music squares with her, and was busy twirling, moving her hips in time with whatever rhythm she was listening to.

From where we were sitting we could only see that she was wearing a short sleeved cotton shirt, her house tie loose around her neck, and a black waist coat under her robes. When she came nearer, we were able to see her from the waist down…

Ernie's jaw hit the floor, Justin's eyes grew as big as the grapefruit on his plate, and Aaron, well Aaron just leaned back a bit to fully appreciate the sight of Elena Holland in red short shorts, black converse All Stars, and a sinful amount of leg showing.

When she lifted her arms to hug the Weasley twins, her shirt rode up a bit to expose a tiny sliver of her tanned mid-riff.

_Enough! You . Have . A GIRLFRIEND!_

Dumbledore cleared his throat.

I jumped. Christ, did the man know everything? How could he read my thoughts?

"Good morning everyone, now, I know this is rather unconventional, but today we have a possible student here."

_Oh. Never mind then._

"She will be spending the next three days with us, and then deciding whether or not to join the Hogwarts Student body. Students, please welcome Miss Alexandra Bourbon," Dumbledore swept his cloak aside to reveal a petite girl with refined features, porcelain skin and deep brown hair- like heavy mahogany. She was wearing a light blue dressy-top thing over white shorts and gold sandals.

A scream came from the Gryffindor table. Every head whipped around to see Elena Holland standing up and screaming in delight.

"ALLIE!" she cried.

"LENA!" cried the girl on stage.

"OH MY GOD!" they both yelled in unisen, and then began sprinting towards each other. They met halfway, hugging each other and doing a sort of jig.

They quickly and simultaneously sobered up, proceeding to do some kind of secret hand shake which involved high fiving and a kind of hand-weaving bum wiggle-jump.

After that, chatter erupted and it was as if nothing had happened. Every eye in the hall (well, at least the one's belonging to males) was still glued to Elena - and now her friend, - travelling back and forth between the girls and the large bowl of peaches. However it seemed Elena was too excited to notice the peaches, being too busy talking to Allie.

"Why did we have to have another new girl _today_? Couldn't she have come tomorrow, when there aren't peaches?" asked an exasperated Aaron from beside me.

"Murphy's law," said Ernie with a mournful sigh.

"Yeah? Well Murphy can take his law and-"

"GINNY WEASLEY YOU GET BACK HERE WITH MY PEACHES!"

I turned to see Allie and Elena in hot pursuit of Ginny, who had drawn attention to the bowl of fruit by walking past Elena with it. Now if she were a boy, one would assume she'd done it for the benefit of all those in the hall. As she was a girl though, it would only be thought she enjoyed playfully baiting her friend. How strangely similar the interactions between girls was to those between boys…

It was about three seconds before everyone realised what was happening, and four seconds before every boy in the room (well, almost every boy, Cho was anchoring me to the spot with her death stares. Not that I would have chased after the thieving red head) to start blocking of escape routes and closing in on the youngest of the Weasley clan.

"Get your own!" shouted Ginny.

"Those _ARE _mine!" cried Elena.

From beside her Allie halted a puzzled look on her face.

"I don't even like peaches that much. Why am_ I_ chasing her?" she asked Elena, who was wrestling the bowl out of Ginny's hands while trying not to spill any of the fruit.

"Because you like being part of the fun," said Elena, not taking her eyes from Ginny.

Allie nodded, "that could be it…"

"HA! VICTORY IS MINE!" shouted Elena when she had finally managed to obtain the prized fruit.

"MISS HOLLAND!" bellowed Professor Umbridge. "Ladies do NOT run around like headless imps! They are quiet and sit in their SEATS!"

"Yeah, the _boring _ones," Elena yelled right back, pulling a tongue.

Allie laughed and signalled for a high five.

"Detention! And ten points from Gryffindor!"

Elena's face clouded over immediately. All the mirth evaporated from her eyes, and her smile faded into a determined line.

Allie raised her eyebrows and nodded her head slightly in Professor Umbridge's direction. Elena nodded. It was the kind of nod a Queen would give to an executioner.

**Elena**

This was PERFECT! Allie was here! She was like, my BEST most AWESOME friend! And now, she was going to be able to help me… 'dispense' with Umbridge… Oh this was going to be _so much_ fun.

Now, the first step would be to make sure I knew where the diary was… in the Pink Cow's office somewhere most likely. Next; to get in there, get the diary, and get out without her knowing we were there. That would mean a distraction was necessary…

I considered telling the gang, you know, get them in on the act, but I figured that Harry had enough to deal with, and Hermione was too worried about being a prefect. Ginny was still moderately innocent, and I didn't have the time to corrupt her at this point, although I'm sure she'd love to do it. As for Ron, well… Actually, why not? He'd be in the spotlight for once… Well, it's settled then; Ron, Allie and I are about to go on a mission of mass destruction.

I looked around and spotted Ron walking a little ahead with Harry and Hermione.

"Hey Ron, come over here for a sec, I want to introduce you to Allie."

Ron waited for us to catch him up. Lazy thing, he couldn't even walk back to us. I must be rubbing off on him.

"Allie; Ron. Ron; Allie," I said, quickly gesturing between the two of them.

"Hi," said Allie with a wave and a smile.

"Hi," said Ron. "How're-"

"Great! Now that we all know each other, here's the deal: we're going to break into Umbridge's office, steal her diary, and then expose whatever festering turd of a secret she's got."

"What!" Ron cried.

"Shhh!" Allie and I exclaimed, each clamping a hand over his mouth. Around us people looked slightly perturbed, but then went back to their own conversations.

Allie and I let go cautiously.

"Why me?" he asked. "Surely Harry-"

"Harry's got enough to deal with," I cut in, "and Hermione will be too paranoid about her role as prefect, and I figured you'd like to do this with us alone, you know? Get yourself into that spotlight for a bit."

Ron considered this. "How do we even know she's _got _a 'festering turd' secret?"

"Pshhh," Allie rolled her eyes, "everyone does."

"I don't," said Ron."

"Suuure you don't," I said, rolling my eyes.

"No, really, I don-"

"How are we going to do this?" said Allie, cutting him off.

"Well, first off, we have to get into her office; any bright ideas?" I asked.

"You could always get detention again," offered Ron, still looking a tad ruffled.

"Not a bad idea, but then we'll need some kind of distraction to get her out of there long enough for me to find- oh, wait, I could just Accio the diary!" I smacked my head, it was just so simple. We didn't even need to go into the office!

"But then she'd know it was you," pointed out Allie. The imaginary lightbulb above my head buzzed and went out. Stupid logic.

"True."

"What if you snuck into her office while she wasn't there?" said Ron.

"That's good, but again we'd probably need a distraction," said Allie

We brainstormed ideas on how to distract the woman as we made our way down to the dank dungeon for Potions. We'd thought of getting a band of ninja's wearing pink doilies to have brawl in the courtyard, but that wouldn't work because we'd want to watch it. Then of having Ron dress up as a transvestite and start signing songs from_ Rocky Horror_, but Ron refused point blank, despite our bribes of helping to dress him and coaching him to sing. Spoil sport.

Then Harry stole Ron back, and Allie and I carried on commiserating. We were in deep discussion of a plan involving iPod speakers, banana cream pies and a monkey on a unicycle when we came to the dungeon.

Snape, instead of waiting for us to sit down and _then_ come raging in through the doors as usual, decided to mix it up a little and burst _out _of his class room. The man was terrifying. He looked more incensed and greasy than usual.

"Who's the wacko that's never heard of shampoo?" whispered Allie.

"That would be Snape," I whispered back.

"You mean the one that could open a can with his no- jeeze you weren't kidding! That thing's massive!"

"Told you so, but it's still a mystery how he can't smell his own stink when he's got such big nostrils."

"Maybe they're clogged up with nose hair," said Allie. I nodded, acknowledging that this was a distinct possibility, before realising how gross that would be. That was just TOO gross to think about so soon after breakfast.

"The Ministry Of Magic has decided that the potions I am _attempting_-" he glared at Harry, "-to teach you, are too dangerous for your age. Therefore you will be having dancing lessons in place of Potions, while the new curriculum comes through."

There were whispers of excitement for the twenty milliseconds that Snape took to bring his fist slamming down onto the spot which was supposed to have been his desk. Not having realised he was not in his classroom, he instead brought it down on some Slytherin's head. He almost jumped when he didn't feel wood beneath his fist, but noticed it was Crabbe's head and ignored it.

"You will make your way to the Great Hall in _silence_," he hissed.

We trooped _silently _into the Hall to find that it had been cleared of the tables and benches, and now had a huge record player. I idly wondered why we having _dancing lessons_ of all things. Surely another hour to do homework wouldn't kill us? Or another lesson? Unless it was Defence. I might be forced into suicide if I had to read another chapter of that stupid textbook.

To my intense displeasure, Umbridge appeared from behind the record player, and cleared her throat in that beyond irritating way that drove anyone with ears mad.

_Speak of the devil, and she shall appear._

"Good morning class," she said in a sweet, chipper voice.

"Good morning Professor Umbridge," we replied.

"As you have been told, the Ministry has found that the potion skills you are learning are far too dangerous for your age, and is at this very moment devising a safer, more appropriate curriculum. It has therefore been decided that for today, your Potions lesson will be taken over by a dancing lesson, instructed by myself," she said, indicating with her plump hand to her even fatter stomach. I'm not sure if it was on purpose, but it made me want to throw up.

"Now, please get into partners," she said.

Allie and I immediately we grabbed each other.

"Miss Holland, Miss Bourbon, find yourselves partners," came Umbridge's sickly sweet voice.

"We have," we said in usion.

"_Male _partners," she said with a little laugh that made me want to vomit even more.

We looked around. Ron and Hermione were together (_halla-friggen-lujah!i_), Harry had grabbed hold of a random girl, who looked delighted to be the dance partner of The Boy Who Lived. Seamus was with Lavender, Parvati with Michael Corner, and so far as I could tell, the only decent person available was Nevi- wait, nope, Rose Zeller had grabbed him. Stupid Slytherins.

"But, Allie's new, and she doesn't know anyone besides me," I said.

"Nonsense, this is an opportunity to get to know people," said Umbridge with an evil, false sweet grin. I hated it when teachers said that. Didn't they realise we'd get to know people without them separating us from the people we already knew?

The only boys left were Crabbe and Goyle. Oh He-yl no!

"I'm a newsociophobic!" said Allie.

"A what?"

"A phobia of knowing new people," Allie said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"I've heard of no such thing," said Umbridge.

"Well then that's your problem! I've got enough to deal with woman, don't give me more troubles!" Allie screamed.

"Miss Bourbon, unless you want to go to the Hospital wing; find yourself a partner!"

Allie and I looked at each other. Then Allie pretended to faint and I caught her.

"See what you've done now! You've made her get to know you! I'm going to have to take her to the Hospital Wing now, and not be able to participate in this lesson. Oh woe is me," I said, all the while getting closer and closer to the door.

"Now, listen here Miss Hol-"

"Gotta go, bye!" I shouted, and dragged Allie as fast as I could out of there.

Once we were safely away, I dropped her.

"Hey! Is that anyway to treat me after I've saved us from dancing with gross boys?"

"You made me drag you."

"No, you did that yourself."

"Would you have preferred me to leave you in there?"

"That's mean. Don't be mean to me, I'm a newsociophobic!"

"No you're not."

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"Ha!" cried Allie.

"What- how'd you do that?" I asked.

"Skill," said Allie with lifting her chin in a cool half nod.

"Niiiice," I said.

There was a brief silence.

"So what do we do now?" asked Allie.

"I dunno, what d'you wanna do?"

"I dunno, what d'_you _wanna do?"

Allie thought about it. "Let's go get the Pink Porous Pig fired!"

"Yes!... How?" I asked.

"I dunno, I thought you had a plan," said Allie.

"Kinda…" then it occurred to me that we were plotting to get a professor fired in the middle of a hallway. Not such a good idea.

I grabbed her hand and ran all the way back to Gryffindor Tower with her, asking why we were running, to which I replied; "the walls have ears!" When we were inside the common room, I seated Allie by the fire, and we began to plot the downfall of Dolores The-Fashion-Challenged-She-Devil Umbridge.

* * *

By the end of Potions, Allie and I had finalised the plan; code named 'Swine flew' (get it, because she's a pig, and we're going to get her to fly away? Huh? Huh?). Next on the agenda it was Care of Magical creatures, can you say 'awesome'?

Allie and I skipped ahead of the Golden Trio (people really needed to come up with cooler names), and were met by a wizened witch, with sagged features and a purple hat that drooped a bit at the top.

"Quickly now, quickly now," she called in a crisp, slightly thin voice.

We neared the clearing in which she stood and looked around, trying to figure out what she was going to show us.

"Today, we will be learning about Unicorns," said the Professor.

There were a few oooohs, as Allie and I exchanged looks of anticipation. She had a whole stable filled with unicorns at her house, which I visited all the time during the holidays. We were going to have SO much fun showing off.

"As you may know, unicorns prefer girls and chaste women to boys and men, as girls are gentler and of a kinder nature. Now, who can tell me what a Unicorns' favourite food is?"

Hermione's hand shot up.

"Persequinties," she sad, "the sweet taste and the root's dazzling violet blue colour heightens the unicorns' senses and enables them to heal faster."

"Correct, Miss Granger. Now will each of you please take one Persequinty follow me."

We did as we were told and after a few meters we saw them; cream coats shining in the patches of sunlight that filtered through the trees, horns glittering like crystal, and golden hooves pawing at the dull earth.

"Now, slowly the girls will begin to approach them, and then the boys afterwards."

Allie and I were just about to feed the pretty horses when some randoms pushed in front of us. They all wore the tiniest blue skirts I'd ever seen, accompanied by the tightest tops and highest heels in existence, which even now were sinking into the mud.

"Excuse me, but you've just pushed in line," I said, tapping the middle one on the shoulder.

She turned around and death glared me. The girl had pin straight black hair and black eyes, while her two friends were both blonde and had attempted to get their hair as straight as hers.

"What's your point?" she asked in a haughty tone.

Allie's eyes grew wide and my eye brows rose.

"I'm sorry, I think that you want to rephrase that," I said coldly.

"And I think you need to fill that empty head of yours," she said sweetly, turning her back on me, as did the two blondes.

_Oh. No. She. Didn't._

I pulled her shoulder so she faced me, but in her stick thin high heels she nearly toppled over.

"Watch it whore!"

My mouth popped open audibly, and Allie gave a low whistle.

"And who are you calling whore in that outfit, slut?"

Her two minions grinned at the scent of a bitch fight.

"At least I have the legs for it," she said.

"What legs? All I see are spindly sticks."

"Better than the hunks of meat yours are," said Blonde number 1.

"Hunks of meat nothing, these are finely toned muscles of speed," I said.

"Really? They look like broken down fat," said Blonde number 2.

"Well I'd rather have big calves than a double wide backside," I said.

The blondes gasped and put their hands over their mouths.

"You'd know wouldn't you? Tell me, where did they put all the fat after your liposuction?" asked the ringleader.

"Why, they just looked around for and empty space and hey, there was your head, all nice and roomy inside," I said with a smile.

"In case you hadn't noticed, I'm in Ravenclaw," said the ringleader.

"Since you're too _stupid_ to notice; I don't care."

"I'm guessing you also haven't noticed that those shoes went out of style, oh wait, they were never _in _style."

"Don't you dare knock All Stars!" Allie and I cried in unisen.

"All Stars? More like NO Stars," she said, getting high fives from her two little groupies. Ugh, it was like a badly acted Muggle movie.

"And what about yours, huh? Planning to rob anymore dustbins?" said Allie.

"I'll have you know that these are genuine Manolos."

"And I'll have you know that they're genuine fakes," said Allie. She could spot a knock off a mile away.

"Like you would know," said Blond #1

"Well clearly none of you do; those are the worst replicas I've ever seen."

"Judging by your outfit, I'm sure you've seen plenty. Where did you get your top from? The homeless shelter?"

"Try Marc Jacobs," Allie hissed.

"Gee, to afford that you guys must work in a team, tell me; how much is your hourly fee?"

"How dare you call her a prostitute!" I shrieked.

"How dare you show your face in public!" she said, her beady little black eyes getting a self satisfied glint.

By now a little crowd had gathered to watch.

"This isn't a brothel," she continued.

"Really? Guess you'll be going then," I said, giving a sad pout and a little wave. I saw from the corner of my eye that Allie had been doing it at the same time. We totally had some kind of psychic wavelink.

"Not before you and your hobo friend."

"If you attempt to insult Allie one more time, I swear to Merlin I'll hex you so badly you'll never leave the house again."

"Oooh, look who's getting all defensive!" said Beady Eyes.

"Oooh, look who's dirtying their precious knock-offs," Allie said, pointing to where the three were steadily sinking into the soft earth.

The three girls cried and tried to free their heels, but they were so deep and the ground so wet, that they looked like birds trying to take off.

Everyone around us laughed at their flaying arms, and then the middle one lost her balance and brought the other too down with her as they fell on their butts in the mud behind them.

"Come on Lena, let's go feed the unicorns," said Allie.

And so we did, while everyone else laughed at the three girls falling over each other as they attempted to get up.

Hermione, Ron and Harry came up to us afterwards, Harry was not pleased.

"That was Cho Chang you just insulted," he said.

"And we should care… why?" asked Allie.

"Because Harry's had a crush on her for ages," said Hermione nonchalantly, stroking the unicorn before her.

"_HER?_" Allie and I cried in unisen.

"You can do SO much better Harry," I said.

"WAAAY better," said Allie.

"What are you talking about? She's the prettiest-"

"Hag from Hell," I said.

"Smartest-"

"Bimbo," said Allie.

"Look would you just let me finish?" asked Harry, irritated.

"Nope," Allie and I said together.

"Harry, let me spell it out for you; she's a bitch, a skank, a little random ringleader who thinks she runs this place, and probably has the personality of a cup of Bubbatober pus," I said matter-of-factly.

"That, and she can't tell the difference between a Manolo, and a back-street, made-in-a-dark-basement-with-no-lights-by-a-fashion-blind-nun knock off," said Allie.

"And she's got a boyfriend, mate," said Ron.

"Oh no, who's the poor sucker?" I asked.

"Cedric Diggory," said Harry, like it was a swear word.

Cedric… that name rang a bell… Hang on, wasn't his brother the one that Voldemort killed and Harry came back out of the maze with at the Tri-Wizard Cup? Awkwaaard.

I was pulled from my musings by Allie, who was tugging me to our next class. Pity, I liked the pretty unicorns. Perhaps I'd visit them sometime. In the meant time though, Allie and I had some work to do...

It had taken some convincing, but finally, Ron had relented and agreed to our plan. So when everyone headed to dinner, Allie and I armed ourselves before following them, careful to sit at the opposite end of the table. When ten minutes had passed, and Ron still hadn't acted, Allie and I began charming potatoes to fly from the serving plate into his head. After the spuds had coated the left side of his face in butter, I think he got the point. Slowly, he took out his wand, and stared mournfully at us. Allie gave him her best DO-IT!-or-I-shall-dye-you-hair-purple-with-green-spots look. He grimaced, and then pointed to one of his own potatoes, and flung it across the table at Fred and George. It hit Fred on the head and then bounced onto George's. I think it physically hurt Ron to see the potato go to waste… When the twins looked around, Ron did his best to make a show of hiding. His brothers grinned at each other, pointed their wands at their own plates, and sent a cloud of peas to hover above their brother's head, and rain down on him like water from an invisible shower. Ron sent a piece of liver back, but instead of hitting Fred square in the nose, it went straight over to Angelina and smacked her on the cheek. She turned to glare at the twins, before sending a handful of mashed potatoes at them. Fred ducked and it hit Lee Jordan. Meanwhile Ron was taking aim again and hit a wee third year on the head with a chicken drumstick. The third year turned to his friend and shoved a green bean into his ear. By this stage Allie and I, unable to resist, had sent a gravy boat over to Cho Chang and her little minions…

**Cedric**

"Cedric, you won't _believe _what that Beauxbatons tramp said to me!" said Cho, striding over to me during dinner.

"What?" I asked, acting the perfect -long suffering- boyfriend.

"She and her friend called me a slut, said Tiffany had a big ass, and then called Brittany stupid," she huffed.

"Well Tiffany _does _have a big arse," said Aaron, who got a hurt look from Tiffany.

"Not that it's a bad thing," said Zack, always the little suck up.

Ernie made slurping noises, unknowingly voicing my thoughts.

"But I'm not dumb! I was totally smarticle today in Potions and put violets into my draught of sleep to make it smell nice," said Brittany.

We all tactfully ignored that comment, as adding something like a flower to the draught of sleep would probably turn it into a badly made ear wax accelerator.

"And you don't exactly look like a nun in that outfit," Justin said to Cho.

"WHAT?" she shrieked.

"Well, it is a very provocative outfit," I said, looking at her skirt length. She saw this, obviously got the wrong idea, and took my hand and laid it on her exposed thigh. I pretended to cough and busied myself with cutting my carrots. She continued ranting like this for so long, that eventually I just tuned out and nodded along. Aaron looked at me, and mouthed "I'll get you for this."

Great, now I was going to have to sleep with one eye- why was there a gravy boat above Cho's head? I looked to Justin, and saw that he was looking confused too. Ah, so I wasn't just going mad with hunger (Cho now insisted on feeding me rabbit food, staying all the while as I pretended to eat it so that I had to scavenge breakfast bars off Justin after every meal. Thank Merlin he was always hungry.

Aaron caught my eye and quirked a brow, then he grinned, and gestured casually with his fork. Following the direction, I saw Elena and Allie looking over at us with intense concentration, both girls had their wands out and a look of evil glee on their pretty faces. By now Ernie had cottoned on to what we were all looking at, and was trying hard not to laugh. I, on the other hand, was trying to make up my mind whether to be the good boyfriend and point the gravy boat out, or a good friend and let her get soaked in the stuff to give my friends some entertainment after their suffering at the hand of my girlfriend.

Before I could talk myself into the first option, the boat tipped and the thick brown liquid poured down onto Cho's head. She screamed and put her hands on her head, then shrieked even louder when she discovered what it was. By this time the boat had set itself down beside Zack's elbow, who had been too busy paying attention to Tiffany's cleavage to see any of it. Cho, seeing the boat and thinking Zack had just ruined her hair, grabbed the plate of liver and smashed it into his face.

**Elena**

From our seats, Allie and I could see the beginnings of our distraction at every table. Gryffindor was already in full swing, half of them charming food to swoop across the room at knee level to the Slytherin table, and then dumping it on unsuspecting heads. Hufflepuff had been taken care of thanks to Cho and her minions, and now all that was left was Ravenclaw. I nodded to Ron, and then grabbed a handful of beans, chucked them across the tables into a very surprised Ravenclaw's face, at which point Ron bellowed "FOOD FIGHT!"

Absolute pandemonium set it, and every student got in on the act. Once everyone was throwing around plates of carrots and potatoes, I sent over a plate of drumsticks to Snape, who saw it coming, and deflected it, looking through the crowd of people and trying to see who had sent the hostile poultry at him. I just grinned, because it hadn't been him I was aiming at. By deflecting the plate, he had unwittingly sent it careering into Professor Binns head, but because he was a ghost, it landed on none other than Professor McGonagall. I really didn't have anything against her, but I knew that she would automatically assume it was Snape, and get back at him rather than do nothing. She was cool like that.

From my seat I could hear her saying "Oh ho Severus, who's too old for child's games now?" she said, a wicked glint in her eye as she sent a pile of steak and kidney pies at him. I wondered what their argument before had been about, but I didn't have time to wonder. Beside McGonagall, Umbridge cried out and tried to regain order, but someone (it _looked_ like professor Flitwick, but couldn't possibly have been) had sent a rather large potato at her which efficiently plugged her mouth. I thought I saw Dumbledore hiding her wand in a steak and kidney pie, but I must have been seeing things. Either that; or he was even more epic than I'd first thought. I wished I could join in, but Allie and I had a mission.

**Cedric**

It was a complete bedlam, Cho was screaming at me to protect her, Aaron was firing pieces of liver in every direction, Ernie was methodically covering every prefect's face with mashed potatoes, Justin was enjoying himself as he catapulted pies at all the irritating third years, and Tiffany and Brittany were wailing about their hair.

In the end I reluctantly pushed Cho under the table and was about to get down and shield her from any stray meals when Zack hit me with a carrot.

This meant war.

I abandoned my girlfriend under the table with her cowering side-kicks and joined in the fight, sending globs of gravy at any one I laid eyes on.

**Elena**

Allie and I had slipped out the doors into the hallway and were sprinting to Umbridge's Office.

When there, we used every spell we knew to conceal ourselves, open the cabinet and make a copy of the diary's cover, sticking it on a blank book, and taking the real one ourselves. It was all over within seconds, and I thought what a fool she had been to only put four security spells on the door, two on the doorknob, one on the first stone in front of the door, and three on the place she hid her diary. Amateur.

Within minutes we were back down in the hall, Umbridge's diary safely secured in Allies belt and concealed by her long grey jumper.

When we walked in, the war was still on, but suddenly, all the food disappeared. Allie and I were already covered in butter, so we looked as if we'd been there the whole time, and we quickly grabbed food from the floor, completing the guise. For a moment it looked like the excitement was over, but then dessert appeared.

_Oh, this was going to be fun._

**Cedric**

The first person to grab a custard pie was Aaron, who then shoved it into Zack's face with a satisfied smile.

"You can't do that! I'm your cousin!" cried a very yellow Zack.

"Unfortunately, but that doesn't mean you aren't the most annoying prick in the room," said Aaron.

"I'll tell your mum!"

"I'll tell yours you looked down a girl's top."

Zack went pale, and then was hit in the back of the head with a toffee pudding.

Roger Davies sent a crème caramel in my direction but I dodged it and it hit Katie Bell instead. Katie swivelled around and sent a chocolate cake flying, hitting him squarely in the chest.

At that point, I saw Elena and Allie, rushing towards us, evil smirks on their faces, and looking supremely smug, but it seemed as if they hadn't noticed Aaron and I. When they got to our spot, they hit the ground and tipped the bench over, forming a bunker and then opened fire on Parkinson and Malfoy, who were standing a few meters away. Allie nailed Pansy in the face with a lemon meringue

"Take Cover!" screamed Allie when Malfoy and Parkinson returned fire with a swarm of apple-crumbles.

"Well whose side are you on?" yelled Lena to Aaron, who had been looking at her now fairly see-through top with awed interest.

Aaron snapped out of it, pulled me down with him and began sending clouds of ice-cream to freeze and drench the four Slytherins that were fighting from under a table.

"Lena!" shouted Hermione Granger from a little way away from our bunker.

"Mione! Get your butt over here and help me coat Parkinson in custard!" Elena shouted back.

"But it would be-"

"I don't care that you're a prefect! Get behind the bench and fight woman!"

Hermione scurried over to us.

"Lena, I can't there's just no way that I could do that in good conscience. They're terrible people but we have to be more mature than them and not stoop-"

Blaise Zabini had managed to negotiate a whole bowl of chocolate mousse through the battle field and onto Hermione's head.

Elena cocked her head to the side and quirked an eyebrow.

"Where's the toffee pudding?" asked Hermione with a thunderous expression. Allie grinned evilly and handed it to her.

Boy was I glad to be on their side.

"We're running out of ammo!" said Justin, who had also joined us.

"Then take some of theirs," said Aaron, who levitated a mound of lemon meringues that were on the Slytherins' table and brought them over to our side.

"Impressive," said Allie, nodding her head.

Aaron shrugged and sent her a wicked grin.

"Allie, you take my place, I'm going to get the secret weapon," said Elena.

"Secret weapon?" I asked Aaron.

"Unless she strips down to her knickers, I don't know what it is either," said Aaron.

"Harry! Ron! Get your big heads out of the way! We're trying to win a war here!" shouted Allie as The Boy Who Lived and Ron Weasley strayed into the field.

The two immediately dropped to the floor and leopard crawled to our position.

"Move over, we're going to need room for this baby!" cried Elena, who had a small custard tart in her hands.

"What are you talking about? That piddly thing won't do anything," said Ron.

Elena grinned like a mad woman with a flame thrower.

"Wait and see," she said, pointing her wand at it, saying _engorgio_ over and over.

**Elena**

After ten casting of the growth spell, the weapon was finally ready to be fired. Allie and the troops got their wands and helped me set the tart into an invisible sling shot; we took aim, and fired.

There were muffled cries as we covered the ten odd Slytherins that had been firing at us with the enormous pastry.

We all shouted with glee just as the plates vanished, and Dumbledore's voice rose just barely above the din.

"Order!" it proclaimed, and somehow, even though it wasn't all that angry or loud, every student stopped, and looked over to our sugar coated headmaster.

Dumbledore looked like he'd had quite a bit a bit of fun himself, if the skew hat and flushed cheeks were anything to go by. Underneath the large custard tart, the Slytherins were banging their fists against the buttery pastry, yelling something that I couldn't quite make out.

"After that marvellous evening activity, I think it's time that you went off to bed, but perhaps stopped by the washrooms first," smiled Dumbledore.

Beside him, I saw a wriggling mass of pink ruffles, crawling towards a crushed pie.

As we all began to say goodnight and leave the hall, a triumphant cry went up and Umbridge, now sticky _and_ icky, stood up.

"No punishments after that abominable behaviour? The Ministry will soon have this school sorted out! There will be no more of this nonsense when they get my report, and the first step to correct the terrible state that the school is in will be to find a new, more suitable headmaster!" she screeched.

A deathly silence fell.

Half the teachers began to take steps towards Umbridge, with murderous looks, and I found that I was joining them.

"Dolores, I think that you had better sit down and collect yourself, before you say anything else you might regret," said McGonagall through gritted teeth.

"How dare you address me in that way before the students! And I do not regret anything! It is _you _who will be sorry!" shrieked the piglet.

Dumbledore cleared his throat.

"Well, be that as it may, I am still headmaster here, and I think that we have all had quite enough excitement for one night, please will everyone retire to their common rooms and then on to bed."

Slowly, we all shuffled out of the hall, everyone whispering urgently.

That night, Allie and I stayed up reading the diary. It seemed that she documented her every movement and thought, resulting in a lot of useless information. For the most part we were disgusted by the inner workings of The Piglet's mind, but there were certain areas that interested us very much.

Morning came, and with it the promise of a new day, a new era, one that was filled with hope and laughter, and, more importantly, lacking a certain pink obsessed Professor.

* * *

Are we liking Allie? Why or why not?

Did you like the food fight?

Anyone catch the _Jungle Book_ reference there?

Do we have any pro-Cho people out there? If yes, I'm sorry for covering her in gravy.

How about Aaron? What do we think of him hmm? Good? Bad? Sarcastic?

Read, rate and review! … well actually, you would have already read it at this point, unless you skipped all the way down here and to read my author's note. Which could be seen as weird is I and my author's notes weren't so amazing.

Imma stop rambling now and let you get to the next chapter…


	7. 6 Revenge is Sweet

**Chapter Six**

Here you are; chapter six, with seven on the way shortly. Remember; We LOVE reviews and reviewers! How did you like the last (super long) chapter?

Enjoy

Paula and Allie

xxx

* * *

**Revenge is Sweet**

**Cedric**

Someone was sitting on me. I don't know why, but they were.

There was only one person who would do this.

"Aaron. Get off my feet. Your cutting off my circulation," I said, my words muffled by my pillow.

"Nah, I'm rather comfortable here."

"Aaron, move, or I'll call Zack," I mumbled, having moved my head so it faced the door, and blearily trying to open my eyes.

"Ah now don't be grumpy, you know just as well as I do that that would involve an amount of energy you aren't willing to use."

"You are wrong."

"I'm never wrong."

"ZAA-!"

Aaron cut me off by stuffing a slipper in my mouth.

"Alright, alright, you made your point, now get up. I'm hungry, which means I need food."

"Mmm, more like you need your voyeuristic appetite satisfied," I grumbled, once I'd removed the slipper. It tasted of sweat and Geraldine's gummi worms. Must be Justin's.

"Correct. But either way, I still need to be in the Great Hall to satisfy _any_ appetite, and that means you have to get up, which means that I have to sit on you."

"You do also realise that if you cut of the circulation in my feet that I will be unable to walk don't you?"

"Oh toughen up and get over it, Diggory."

"Just as soon as you get off my feet, Smithy."

"Don't call me Smithy."

"Don't sit on my feet."

"You know, we could do this all morning, but either way it will end up the same way."

I sighed, I might as well let him win now, before he gives me another lecture on how he will go about killing me if he misses his 'Daily Dose of Lena' as we call it now.

"With you sitting at the table, torturing me with your slow-mo eating of food while Cho force feeds me bird seed?"

"You got it. Personally, I don't know why you put up with the girl."

I didn't really know either, but then again, I didn't really know what to do about it, so I just left it.

"You know, you're really a rather terrible best friend," I told him.

"Please, I'm the best best friend anyone could ask for," he said, finally getting off my feet.

Getting out of bed, I noticed that Ernie and Justin were still asleep. Ernie seemed to be in the 'turtle' position, head under the pillow, knees curled up by his chest, and his hand kinda looked like a little wing on his ankle.

Aaron proceeded to place one of Zonko's Banshee Bombs next to each boy's head.

He flicked his wand, setting them off. _That _got them out of bed. It was about twenty seconds of non-stop screeching before the bombs fizzled up and became little piles of black dust.

"You know, I really am beginning to dislike your wake-up calls," shouted Ernie, still clutching his head.

"Well, I'll take that into consideration the next time I happen to care," said Aaron, waltzing off down the stairs.

"WHAT?" shouted Justin.

Poor guy, I think he'd gone temporarily deaf.

**Elena**

This was it.

Allie and I were like two ringing cell phones on silent; bouncing up and down in our seats so much we were vibrating. Whenever we looked at each other, grins of glee and evil anticipation spread across our faces, thoroughly creeping out anyone watching.

First thing this morning, we'd bolted from the tower into Professor McGonagall's office, showing her what we'd found. She hadn't been all that pleased at first that we'd stolen from a teacher and violated privacy, but seeing as it was Umbridge and what we'd found was so important, she told us that it was all in good hands. After a long argument with Allie and me both putting our feet down and insisting that we be a part of things, she relented and allowed us to be the ones who read out from the diary.

Now we just had to wait for the signal.

Umbridge came into breakfast late with a twitchy walk and black expression that could have taken my eyebrows off.

Looks like she'd noticed the absence of her diary.

Allie and I snickered and shared more evil grins.

"Good morning students," she sang.

"Good morning Professor," we chorused.

"Is it just me, or is she a little flat?" whispered Allie.

I giggled.

"I have some very serious news to tell you," she continued. "News that demands immediate action," she began to pace the front of the room.

"Last night, my personal notebook was removed from my room during dinner-"

A murmur started up, excited whispering and a few giggles sped around the hall as everyone guessed what she meant.

"- and such crimes; invasion of privacy, theft, not to mention the disrespect it has shown to me as a teacher and the High Inquisitor, it has prompted me to make some very hard decisions."

She stopped pacing, and it looked as if she was battling to fight down a grin which threatened to creep onto her repugnant face.

"As of today, I shall be the new Headmistress of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry."

It was like everyone had no life left in their bodies for a few seconds, and then an almighty cry went up, insults were hurled, people started bawling, others began to huddle in conspiratory groups, looking back at the piglet with looks of murder.

Allie and I had stopped vibrating, and were now sitting stock still, mouths open, eyes wide, gaping in open horror at the fat, ugly _thing_ that was before us.

Then it started; the fury that burst up in my stomach that was so hot it felt like ice. I knew in that moment that heads would roll; more accurately, one head; that of the monster in pink before me.

**Cedric**

Aaron and I were sharing looks of irate fury. We both knew exactly what would happen the second Umbridge got behind that desk; first would be to expel any and all half or mixed breeds, meaning that Aaron would be looking for a new school. Then there would come the sackings of staff, replacements, complete ruin and a total lack of anything remotely interesting.

"As soon as the Ministry delivers the official documents, I shall begin my new role in the running of this school-"

"Objection!" yelled Elena Holland and Allie Bourbon, standing up and shouting as one.

Umbridge regarded them coldly. "Sit down, both of you."

"We will not!" shouted Allie.

"Sit down, or you shall both have detention."

"You can't do that, Allie doesn't even go to this school," said Elena.

"Then you will serve hers as well."

"Pfft, how original," said Elena with a roll of her dark blue eyes.

_Wait, I could have sworn they were green a second ago… _

"Miss Holland, if you do not sit down this very moment-"

Professor Umbridge was cut off when a window banged, flying open and scaring a few people nearby. Outside a wind was picking up and storm clouds gathered from nowhere.

Dumbledore stood up.

"Professor, as I am still in charge for the time being, I would wish for you to sit down for a moment while I deal with this matter."

"Ha! You aren't fit to deal cards! It has become painfully clear that you have become unable to run this school-"

"How _dare _you speak to Professor Dumbledore that way!" shouted McGonagall, standing up.

"Sit _down _Minerva!"

"You sit down!" shouted Allie

"ORDER!" cried Dumbledore.

A deathly silence fell.

"Professor Dumbledore, if I may, I was given some news early this morning that may interest you and aid in finding a solution to this problem."

Dumbledore considered McGonagall carefully for a few minutes, his eyes flashed over briefly to where Allie and Elena were still standing, trying to kill Umbridge with their glares.

Allie's hand was twitching towards her wand which was in her boot, and Elena, who had cottoned on to Allie's plan, raised her hand to casually run her fingers through her hair, trying to grasp her own wand which resided in her pony-tail.

Dumbledore noticed this and hastily nodded, "very well, please present your evidence."

"Thank you, Professor," said McGonagall. Then she turned to address Professor Umbridge. "It has come to my attention that not only have you been taking advantage of your position both in the Ministry and at this school, but you have treated students unjustly and breaching their rights as students of Hogwarts and the young Witches and Wizards' Rights act of 1852."

"What!" spluttered Umbridge, "that is preposterous! How could you even-"

"I am not finished yet, _Dolores_," said McGonagall, who looked to be enjoying herself. "You have also gone against the law, disregarded the safety of both magical and non-magical folk, and besides that you have slandered and unjustly punished certain students."

"You can't prove-"

"Oh, but I can," said McGonagall with an evil smile. I shivered; that was just plain creepy.

"Girls, you may present the evidence you have collected," said Professor McGonagall, nodding her head to Allie and Elena, who were both grinning again by now.

"Shall we?" said Elena, whipping out a book from her long robes.

"We shall," said Allie, opening it and clearing her throat in a very good impression of Umbridge.

"Dear Diary," Allie began. Umbridge looked faint.

"Today I improved the attitudes of three more trouble makers. It was sheer bliss to watch the looks on their faces as they discovered how my quills worked. Those two Weasley boys were in again, along with Potter. I would have thought that by now the way they grimaced when the quill dug deeply, and how they tried in vain to be gentler, would bore me; but I still am able to gain a smile every time."

Every eye in the hall turned to death glare Umbridge, save those of Aaron, who was grinning at the girls, and Cho, who was whispering to Tiffany and Marietta about something. Umbridge looked decidedly uncomfortable. Allie handed Elena the book.

"I still feel a great sense of pride when I think of all the good I did for the Ministry and Cornelius. Dear, dear Cornelius, he is too soft sometimes. He could not bring himself to do what was needed in order to unite the Wizarding community, to ease the fears of those gullible enough to believe that He Who Must Not Be Named has, or could ever return. It is all the fault of Harry Potter. Many times I told Cornelius 'the boy must be stopped, we must discredit him,' but he would not listen, saying it was against the code, but really, would a tiny digression from the code, just once, to help the greater good, be all so bad? Diary, you know how very much I abhor the idea, but this was the one and only exception. And so it was I who sent those two Dementors to Potter's street in the Holidays."

My mouth dropped open, everyone let out a collective gasp, and Elena Holland's pretty face was transfigured by a malicious glint in her eyes, and a satisfied smile as she shut the book in her hands. She looked like the cat that had gotten the canary, and then managed to blame it on the dog.

"That will be all girls," said McGonagall.

"Not exactly Professor," said Allie, producing five quills and a piece of paper from her pocket.

"You see, after we'd shown you the diary this morning, Allie thought it might be a good idea to get a quill to show you that we didn't make any of this up, just in case certain people-" Elena turned to look pointedly at Umbridge "- denied the truth. So we did."

"And when we found them, they were wrapped up in this; a receipt for an order of three dozen Punishment quills from Gorgon stationery, with yesterday's date. Clearly the professor wanted to be able to have more than five people in any one detention at a time," said Allie.

For a few moments all that we could do was stare; Umbridge was caught; there was no way she could wriggle out of this one.

Dumbledore cleared his throat, breaking the silence.

"Well, Professor Umbridge, if you could please follow me to my office, we will discuss this."

He said it in a very calm and reasonable tone, despite how his eyes glimmered with humour, but it seemed that now Umbridge had well and truly gone off her rocker.

"No! I will not go! This is a conspiracy!" she cried, then turned and ran from the room.

She was surprisingly spry for a woman with such short fat legs.

For a second nobody moved.

"After her!" cried Aaron.

Everyone began to get out of their seats and fly to the door, but I could already see the chaos it would lead too.

"WAIT!" I shouted, and by some miracle, everyone listened. "We'll never find her if we've not got a plan."

"He has a point," said Padma Patil.

"So what's the plan?" asked Ernie.

I stood very still for a second, not used to being so… depended on, or have so many people wanting to listen to me, to carry out my ideas. I mean, it worked with Quidditch, but this was something else…

"Well, Hufflepuff and Gryffindor could split up by grades to search the castle, while Slytherin guards the Forbidden Forest, and Ravenclaw look around the grounds."

There were murmurs of agreement, until;

"Why should we listen to you?" asked Malfoy with a sneer.

"Because," said Aaron with a glare, "we all want her gone, and the longer we spend fighting about who to listen to, the more chance of her escaping." I heard him add 'bloody wanker' under his breath.

"Right, you heard the guy," said Elena, "Ravenclaw and Slytherin, into the grounds, as for Gryffindor and Hufflepuff, Seventh and Sixth years can do the dungeons, fifth can take the lower level, fourth can do this level, third can do upper, and first and second years can patrol the Astronomy tower, in fact, why don't a group of you go and guard the broom shed so she can't try and fly her way out."

"Okay team, Hogwarts on three," said Allie. "One, two, three-"

"HOGWARTS!" we cried, then everyone began running in their respective directions.

"And uh, what shall we mere teachers do?" asked Professor McGonagall with a slight smile.

"Well, _somebody's _got to make sure she doesn't make it to her office to write the ministry or something, why don't you handle her office and the Owlery?" said Elena.

Snape didn't look happy at the idea of being given orders by a fifteen year old Gryffindor, let alone a girl.

As I got to the end of the table, I looked back to make sure everyone knew where they were going, only to see Justin, still sitting and eating his breakfast.

"Justin, what are you doing?" I yelled.

He lifted his head, as if thinking that he might have heard someone calling his name, and then looking utterly shocked when he saw that there was hardly anyone in the hall.

"JUSTIN!" I shouted.

"WHAT?" he shouted back, pushing his ear forward with his hand, looking like he was trying to hear me better.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I cried.

"WHAT?"

"WHY AREN'T YOU COMING?"

"WHAT'S THAT ABOUT DRUMMING?"

"NO! I SAID WHY AREN'T YOU-" I broke of, then went over to him, and shouted in his ear.

"WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?"

"GEEZ! YOU DON'T HAVE TO SHOUT!" He yelled.

"Because you couldn't hear me," I said.

He whipped his head around, "THERE'S NO BEE NEAR ME!"

I smacked my head.

This might take a while.

**Elena**

It was pretty darn exciting, chasing after the Pink Porous Piglet, at one point I started humming the Mission Impossible theme, and then realised that so was everyone else in our group. After a while we co-ordinated a five part harmony for all the high bits and so on. I know I'm in the right place now.

"That settles it; cool headmaster, epic students, food fights and massive man hunts… I'm so coming here," whispered Allie.

I beamed, "just make sure you're sorted into Gryffindor."

"How do I do that?"

"Threaten to eat the hat if he doesn't."

"Or I could say that I'll bedazzle him."

"But what if he'd like that?"

"Hmmm…."

For a moment, both of us pictured future generations of Hogwarts students having a sparkling, rhinestone encrusted hat placed on their heads…

Then my wand vibrated.

"Come in Lena, this is Mione, do you read me? Over."

"I'm here Mione, over," I said.

We Gryffindors were using our wands as walkie-talkies.

"I think I have a visual, we're in the east wing by Filch's room, over."

"Okay, we're on our way, over and out."

We began to run down the corridors, weaving in and out, using Allie's wand as a GPS, seeing as we were both lacking in sense of direction. As we came to the main corridor that would take us to the main stairway, we heard the tell tale sound of orthopaedic shoes which had been modified to be slightly less bulky, but much more fashion-challenged.

Slowly we crept around the corner.

There she was, about to start down the stairs.

Allie took aim, was just about to fire when Malfoy came into view.

"Professor, come with me, we have cleared a path out of here for you."

_WHAT? That little, evil, stupid, pea-brained, cankerous cockroach!_

"How can I trust you?" asked Umbridge.

"Because I'm a Malfoy, and my father would be very sorry to see you kicked out of the Ministry."

"Hmm, well yes, your father and I have some similar ideas and beliefs…"

This was ridiculous, I looked at Allie, who was already angling her wand again, then took my hand and help me aim at Malfoy too.

"So if you could just- Professor look out!"

"Stupefy!" we cried, at the same time Umbridge yelled _expelliarmus_.

Her spell ricocheted off the walls when Allie and I both hit the floor, while she dodged Allie's and Malfoy avoided mine, but ran into a suit of armour.

"Mione, we have her at the Main staircase, get everyone to surround it and we'll meet you at the bottom, over," Allie said into her wand.

"Ha! Ha ha ha! You'll never catch meeee!" she cried, her eyes going all crazy and crossed as she did a mad jig down the stairs.

We ran after her, but I got stuck on the trick stair, and Allie turned to help me.

"No! Go after her you swizzle stick! I'll be fine!"

Allie nodded, and rand after Umbridge. A few seconds later I heard her executing her trade-mark jinx; _Armodulitivis, _which made the jinxee not only have to roll around in a curled ball like an armadillo, but they started growing large ears and a tail. Now the tail was truly ingenious; because a human wouldn't know how to use it, they unintentionally kept hitting themselves with it.

There was a muffled thump when Umbridge dropped to the floor and began rolling; unfortunately it didn't sound like she rolled down the stairs, but just around and around in circles.

A few meters up and to my right, Malfoy began to get up from the pile of armour.

I threw the apple I'd stuck in my pocket from breakfast at him. It hit him, bounced off his head, hit another suit of armour, which collapsed onto Malfoy as he attempted to walk in a straight line away from the other collapsed suit.

I laughed, and then congratulated myself on how unintentionally impressive that was.

**Cedric**

As I came barrelling around the corner with three quarters of Gryffindor (somehow they had gotten word around that Umbridge was at the main staircase much faster, and most of Hufflepuff was still waffling around trying to find the missing half that had not been told), I heard loud cries of frustration. Thinking it was a fellow student, I pushed ahead as fast as I could, only to find a very sweaty and red-faced Umbridge rolling around in circles while Allie Bourbon sat on the step watching with an amused smile.

"What took ya' so long?" she said.

"On…other side…of…castle," Aaron panted from beside me.

I went over to Umbridge and tried to see what was wrong with her.

All of a sudden, she sprouted a tail and started hitting herself with it.

"It took longer this time for her to sprout a tail. Guess that the jinx has to work on more body mass, plus the weight of her frills and ruffles," mused Allie.

"You have got to teach me that jinx," said Aaron seriously.

"Sure, but first… what do we do with her?" she said, nudging the Professor away from her when Umbridge got quite close to her foot.

"I guess we could just watch her roll around in circles," said Ron Weasley, who was catching his breath on the step.

"Ron! That wouldn't be right!" scolded Hermione.

Lisa Rayne, a seventh year Hufflepuff, sighed and looked very sorry, "no, I suppose we can't, she may be a heinous cow, but this is just too degrading."

For a moment everyone contemplated what we should do. Then Harry Potter piped up.

"Er, has anyone told the teachers that we've caught her?"

"No," everyone said.

"I'll go," said Zack very proudly.

"No you won't," said Aaron.

"I beg your pardon! And why not?" said Zack in a pompous tone.

"Because knowing you, you will somehow manage to turn what happened into a long winded speech about how great you are."

"I would never-"

"We'll go," said Hermione, tugging at Ron and Harry's sleeves.

"Aw do we have to Mione? I wanted to watch her roll around in circles more," said Ron.

"Well if he's staying I am; I won't get tired of this for a good while," said Harry, grinning as he looked at Umbridge, who had now grown ears and was babbling about turnips or something.

Hermione huffed.

"I'll go with you Hermione," said a vague, airy voice.

"Okay Luna, off we go," said Hermione.

"It's alright, we're already here," said a voice from behind us.

Everybody jumped to see that all the professors and a highly amused Ministry official.

"I'll take her now, shall I?" said the wizard, trying very hard not laugh, but cracking a smile.

"That would be best," said Dumbledore, nodding towards Umbridge.

We watched as Professor Sprout took the official to the nearest fireplace connected to the Floo network.

"Well, after all this excitement, I think you had all better be getting to your classes," said Dumbledore, facing us once again. "If a few of you could volunteer to fetch your peers from the grounds and around the castle, I'd appreciate it very much."

A few people put up there hands and went to find the rest of the school. Dumbledore then took Allie aside and spoke to her, after a few minutes, Allie followed Dumbledore down the corridor in the direction of his office with a smile so bright it could be a search light in the darkest depths of the world.

"You're kidding? After all of that, we _still _have to continue as if nothing happened?" said Aaron, looking terribly frustrated.

"Looks like it Smithy," I said, clapping him on the back and ducking when he tried to hit me.

"Boys, off to class," said Professor Sinestra in a severe voice, blowing past us in her black and red robes.

"Yes, professor," we chanted, beginning to walk away from the dispersing crowd.

"What do we have now?" asked Aaron.

"Charms," I said.

Aaron grinned. It was obvious what he was thinking; 'ooh goodie, now I can spend the next hour staring at Elena.'

Well, maybe not that exactly, but somewhere along those lines.

"You know what this means don't you?" he asked.

"I'm going to have to poke you whenever you begin to drool?"

"No! It means that we'll have a free period, Flitwick's so easy going that he'll just teach us something fun and then give us the rest of the lesson. And I never drool," he added, punching me in the arm. It was actually rather funny because seeing as I'd spent the holidays training for Quidditch, hiking, swimming in the lake near my house, and anything else to keep my mind off… what happened, he hurt himself more than me.

I laughed while he nursed his finger and then shoved his hands in his pockets. After a minute he laughed too.

Then he stopped dead and held his arm out so I couldn't go any further.

Draco Malfoy was lying unconscious on the floor near two sets of collapsed armour, and a little further away, stuck in the trick stair, was Elena Holland, sitting in a pool of sunshine that was pouring through the window.

**Elena**

I was beginning to sink.

I was sinking, into a _stair_. It was rather cold, but not nearly as uncomfortable as one would think. The sunshine coming through the window could have helped though.

I wondered if they'd caught Umbridge yet. If they had, where was Allie? She was the only one- besides an unconscious Malfoy- that knew I was here.

This may present a problem…

I wriggled a bit in the stair, but I didn't move. Luckily I didn't fall any further in, but I'd have been much happier if I could get out. Worse was the fact that my wand was, for once, not in my hair, but in my jeans' back pocket. This little fact wouldn't be so bad, if only I knew a spell that would get me unstuck.

But I didn't.

This might also be a problem.

…

I didn't like being stuck.

I _really _didn't like being a damsel either.

I sighed; my options now included screaming for help, waiting for Malfoy to wake up, or let the staircase eat me.

Could a staircase eat me? What would it be like to be eaten by a staircase? Had anyone else been eaten by this staircase before?

I looked down in alarm, imagining dead bodies swirling around my feet.

There weren't any that I could see, but all that thinking about eating had made me realise how hungry I was. The only food I'd had with me I'd chucked at Malfoy.

Drat.

My stomach grumbled.

"Accio apple," I said, summoning my apple without my wand, and feeling rather proud of myself, until the apple smacked me in the back of the head.

"OW!"

There was muffled laughter, and then;

"Hey Elena," said an oddly familiar voice.

I tried to turn around, but found that it wasn't possible.

"Who's that?" I asked, still rubbing my head.

"Aaron," said the voice.

Aaron… Aaron… Curse my inability to remember names! Umm… Oh! It was hot charms guy with the cool purple eyes! How could I forget _him? _

"Hi Aaron," I said.

"Cedric's with me too," said Aaron.

"Oh, hi Cedric," I said, trying to wave backwards but failing.

"Hi," said another voice. Mmm, the voice was dreamy, hearing it gave me a goofy look. I wonder why it appealed to me so much? Maybe it was similar to one in a Wonka bar commercial or something…

There was laughter behind me; I'm guessing it was because I was still trying to wave.

"Need a hand?" asked Aaron.

"Possibly two."

I heard footsteps, and then saw a pair of arms in front of me, which I held onto as Aaron heaved me up and out of the Lena-eating stair.

"There you go-"

"Aaah!" I yelled, not realising that I'd lost feeling in my legs. I sort of wiggled to the floor, and was almost surprised to feel solid ground beneath my bum again.

"You alright?" asked Aaron and Cedric. Aaron came around to the front of me, and Cedric hurried over from where he'd been packing the pieces of armour into a neat pile. Malfoy still lay on the floor, completely unconscious.

"I'm alright, just really numb," I said, poking my leg with interest; it was a really weird feeling.

Then I looked over at Malfoy. Something was niggling me in the back of my head…

"Hey, um, isn't it dangerous that he's been out for that long?" I asked, pointing at the platinum cockroach.

"Probably," said Aaron brightly.

"I suppose we should tell someone he's there," said Cedric reluctantly.

"Yeah, but only after we've got you sorted. Ladies before pricks," said Aaron seriously.

I wriggled my toes and legs about until I could feel them again, and aside from a very bad case of pins and needles, I was fine.

The three of us set of for the hospital wing; Aaron had levitated Malfoy and was carrying him along after he'd lost the game of rock, paper scissors.

Every once in a while Aaron would 'accidently' bang Malfoy's head against the wall, or let him hover just a little too high and hit the low archway above the stairs we went down. It was rather amusing really, but it did slow us down.

When we had dropped him off with Madam Potpourri -at least that's what I think her name was- we began to run to Charms.

**Cedric**

Looking back later that day, running down the hallways with Aaron and Elena turned out to be one of the most entertaining things I'd seen all year; with Elena practically gliding ahead, Aaron trying to get in front (he was so competitive. That, and he probably wanted to show off. Typical.), and me attempting not to laugh every time she pushed ahead just a little and giggled, and making him let out a little sound of frustration and incredulity.

As we came to the second last corridor, Aaron rushed to try and keep pace with the speeding Elena, and then accidently skidding around a corner and going straight through Peeves.

Oh boy, Peeves and Aaron were not on good terms, not since Peeves had foiled one of Aaron's pranks on Zack and gotten him covered in toffee and glitter.

The poltergeist started throwing the balloons he was carrying at us. We soon discovered they were filled with some kind of blue pus and hundreds of tiny little beetles.

"Return fire!" shouted Elena, whose wand suddenly started firing tiny little silver webs at him.

"Lena, you can't hit him, he's a poltergeist!" I called.

One of the webs was headed straight for his chest, but instead of going through, it sprang around him and brought him tumbling down to the floor.

After about a minute of staring, I found my tongue; "I stand corrected."

She grinned, "Allie and I like to explore old parts of her house. Some parts have less than friendly occupants that she taught me how to deal with," she said.

Aaron was amazed; and also covered in blue goo and squirming yellow beetles. I looked down and saw that I was pretty much now a blue goo person, as was Elena.

Then came the tell tale meow of Mrs Norris.

"Oh sheeeeeet," said Aaron, beginning to back away from the disaster zone.

"What? It's just a cat," said Elena, who was holding out her hand to Mrs Norris, making little crooning sounds, inviting it closer.

"Yes," I said, "but her owner is-"

"Mr Filch, hello, what a pleasant surprise!" said Aaron, who had nearly backed into the greasy child-hating care-taker.

"What have you brats been up to?" he yelled.

"Nothing sir! We swear, it was Peeves-"

"That bloody poltergeist is nowhere around here! You are in for a world of trouble," he said, grinning with his yellow and grimy teeth, a manic glaze coming over his eyes.

I could just picture his thoughts; Elena, Aaron and I hanging from our toenails in his office.

"Well, actually sir, he is here," said Elena, stepping aside so he could see the struggling Peeves caught in her web-net.

Filch looked startled, and then so gleeful I thought he might just soil his already filthy pants.

"Ha! Ha ha ha! I've got him! I've finally got him!" he shrieked, doing a jig.

"Yes, you do, so we'll just be on our-"

Filch stopped having his seizure and glared at her, "you will not be going anywhere until you have cleaned up this filth and seen Professor Umbridge."

A hideously dreamy look came into his eyes when he mentioned the woman.

"Er, well, actually sir, she's getting sacked as we speak," said Aaron, battling back a smile.

"What?" snapped Filch.

"Well, turns out she was the one who sent the Dementors to Harry Potter's house in the summer, and she'd been punishing students in a very unsuitable way-"

"There was nothing unsuitable about the way she punished you brats, in fact, in my day, that would be a gentle punishment."

"Um sir," cut in Elena, "hi, yes, we'd like to get to class now if you wouldn't mind-"

"I already told you, you little piece of filth; you will not be leaving until you have cleaned this up-"

"But we didn't make the mess, sir, as you can see, we were just part of what got messed _up_," said Elena, looking perplexed, a violent flush coming to her cheeks.

"I do not care! You will make this place spotless once again, or-"

"So let me just get this straight, we're going to be punished because that poltergeist-" she pointed to a still struggling Peeves, who was now howling profanities at the top of his spectral lungs, "-covered us in blue goo and beetles?"

"Yes, now get mopping," said Filch, about to turn away.

"I'm sorry, Filch, was it? But there's no way in Merlin's realm I'm going to pay someone else's dues, or let these two get into any more trouble than we're already in for being late for class. So," she snapped her fingers, the net disappeared from around Peeves, who whizzed off, cackling madly. Then she threw a little green marble at Filch's feet, which exploded and filled the room with green smoke.

"Goodbye, Mr Filch," said Elena's voice, and then she appeared next to Aaron and I.

"Hurry _up, _this stuff doesn't last forever!" she said, starting to run ahead.

I turned back to see that the smoke was already dissipating, and got the hell out of there.

"How did- What was- You're amazing!" said Aaron.

Elena laughed; that strange, musical bells-and-chocolate sound of hers.

Soon enough we all were laughing, and then she tripped on the carpet. Aaron, trying to slow down, skidded and fell sideways onto her.

I jogged over to help them, but Aaron's leg suddenly came out and tripped _me _as he was trying to get up.

"Um, not that I didn't appreciate the rescue, but could you please stop squishing me?" said Elena from beneath us, her words muffled by the carpet.

Aaron and I laughed but hurriedly got up and help her up. Then she saw Aaron's watch, grabbed his hand and exclaimed; "Crumpets! We are _so _late!"

We all sped towards the classroom.

Aaron finally managed to get ahead and fling the doors open, looking supremely smug and confident, with Elena just behind us, and me leaning against the door catching my breath.

"We're so sorry Professor," I panted. "We found Elena… caught in the… trick stair, and then we had to… take Malfoy… to the infirmary. Then Peeves… caused a slight, er, delay and… well… here we… are."

I'd really been speaking to the floor because I was too out of breath to look up, but when I did, I saw a very different sight than what I'd expected.

**Elena**

When I skidded into the classroom, the first thing I saw was Allie, sitting at a table made up with a beautiful white lacy tablecloth, delicate china and an assortment of mouth-watering tea-cakes, talking with Ron, Harry, Hermione and two boys I'd met before, but whose names (surprise, surprise) I'd forgotten.

The second thing was that there was a big banner which read 'Welcome Allie!' and that the rest of the room was decorated in a similar fashion.

Cool.

"Lena!" cried Allie, Harry and Hermione. Ron was busy trying to eat a whole scone in one bite. He wasn't succeeding.

"It's official, I'm coming to Hogwarts!"

"EEEEP!" I cried, and then went over so we could both jump around excitedly in circles.

This was officially the best day ever; Allie was coming to Hogwarts, The Pink Piglet was getting fired, and there was plenty of sugar on hand to celebrate.

Hermione on the other hand was looking worried.

"What's up Mione? Are you sad because we aren't being all studious?" I teased.

"No, I'm worried because now we need a new teacher, and the only person I can think of who would be willing to take the job on such short notice, would be-"

"Snape," said Ron and Harry with grim and horrified looks. Well, actually Ron just sprayed crumbs and jammy cream globs everywhere, but I'm guessing that's what 'pffape!' meant

Allie and I stopped jumping.

Snape? Teaching Defence? Oh that was just a catastrophe waiting to happen.

* * *

So how about that huh? Umbridge is gone, but now Snape might be in... What do you think will happen? Any suggestions?

Allie's here to stay! Yay! Who do you think she'll be paired up with?

Also, if you've been watching the news lately, there has been horrendous flooding throughout Queensland and parts of New South Wales in Australia, while the other half has been victim to some serious bush fires. If there are funds going around, please donate, otherwise please just keep people affected by these disasters in your thoughts and prayers.

Remember guys, in a split second everything you know and love can be ripped away from you, so live everyday to the full, laugh hard, breathe deeply and remember those less fortunate than yourselves.

Oh, and of course,

Rate and Review!


	8. 7 Hobnobs

**Chapter Seven**

I'm SO sorry for the horrible, totally unforgivable two months of no updates, and for being late with them when I promised I'd have them up by the 30th. I had writers block and assignments, so I'm really really sorry, please forgive me? I've worked out a schedule I hope will work better than my previous one- updating once a week was a bit optimistic, so now I'm doing it every two weeks. It'll let me get ideas, write bits and then link and edit.

A big shout out to you guys, you're amazing! Any criticism or comments of reviews are amazing, and I tend to write faster. Don't ask me how it works, it just does :P

This chapter is dedicated to my Hobnob loving Beta, DeepCrimson91. She's an amazing writer and I've come to call her a great friend too. Give yourselves a treat and click on over to her profile and read her stories, especially 'Shooting the Moon' and its sequel, 'Falling through the Stars'. It's superb.

I really value feedback from you guys!

**WARNING:** this chapter contains traces of highly amusing but equally dirty-minded humour. Readers with innocent and uncorrupted minds who wish to remain that way should click away now. As for the rest of you gutter-minded oddballs [just kidding], ENJOY!

**Hobnobs**

The disturbing thought of the Potions Master finally realising his dream of becoming the Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor was in the minds of every student. However this was slightly overshadowed by the departure of the current one. After dinner that night every house threw a party in their common room. Even most of Slytherin was glad to be rid of her 'cheerful' smile and hideous attire.

As the celebrations drew close to midnight, heads of house were forced to settle the students and order them to their beds- which they promptly climbed out of the second the teacher left- before returning to the secret room beneath the grand staircase where their own quieter, but equally happy party was taking place. When someone had fastened a picture of Dolores Jane Umbridge to the wall, a thrilling game of splattering darts was to be had. The photographed Umbridge ran about the confines of her frame, desperately distressed at the amount of goo that kept hitting her. Needless to say that Professor McGonagall, who had a particular dislike for the former High Inquisitor, had cackled madly when she had managed to win the game (if not entirely fairly) by covering the woman with red goo.

Even the sombre figure of Severus Snape had joined in to the evening's revelries, voicing his extreme loathing for the colour pink, and how the red was marginally better. "Although I believe green would have been a vast improvement."

Headmaster Dumbledore, for his part, enjoyed the amusing sight of his staff having some well-deserved fun as he thought of who might be best to fulfil the open position. A defence teacher was essential in these times, for Dumbledore knew that the Dark Lord, now that he had a body, would be finding allies, and rapidly growing stronger. If there was to be any hope for the children under his care, he must work quickly.

Severus Snape was the obvious choice, but Dumbledore rarely did what was obvious. It was short notice, but he thought there might be a person who could help him, although it might take some convincing. And so, just as the first pale fingers of light were sliding over the grounds, Fawkes flew from the study window, and Dumbledore prepared to endure the loathing that would spark in Severus Snape's eyes when he discovered that once again, he had not obtained his goal.

**Cedric**

I think I have a sugar hangover. Is that possible?

Looking around I saw the aftermath of last night's festivities; crisp packets and sweet wrappers littered the floor making a psychedelic carpet of colours that hurt my eyes with their shiny brightness. People were passed out in awkward poses and places, and a lot of doodles covered everyone.

Looking down I saw that someone had drawn, _on my shirt_, an arrow leading to my belt and written 'Master Bating'.

I rolled my eyes. Why was I always the one that got written on when he was asleep?

Then I noticed that someone had also written 'here pussy pussy pussy' on the hip of a seventh year well-known for her… friendly and, ahem, 'laid back' ways.

Zac was passed out by the fireside, in only his little blue … G-STRING?! I shuddered and tried to wash the image from my head.

_It buuuuurns!_

Aaron was, as usual, covered in lipstick, passed out in an arm chair with two girls draped over him like human blankets. Ernie's twirly French moustache was still visible, if a bit smudged, reminding me of his last act for the night; conversing with his hand, which had a beret and a matching moustache. Justin's head was in a jumbo crisp packet and it moved in and out whenever he breathed.

I rolled over into something sticky, rolled in the opposite direction onto a packet of marshmallows and fell asleep again. I never realised how comfortable Muggle sweets were.

When I eventually cracked my eyes open again, Aaron was just hovering over me with a hose, connected to the massive barrel of Butterbeer we had.

"I'm up! I'm-"

He nailed me in the face.

A few seconds later after I finished coughing and choking, I rubbed the drink out of my eyes and glared at him.

"Just thought I'd make sure you _stayed _up," he said with a shrug.

I noticed that beside me was a hose from the barrel of Triple Berry Crush. A very nice Muggle drink I'd been introduced to last night. It would be a pity to waste it… But it would not be wasted, it would be used in a very noble dead; getting back at my best mate.

When he turned his back on me, I grabbed the hose and sprayed him from head to toe in berry juice and crushed ice. Well actually the ice had melted so it was now just very cold juice.

He turned around slowly.

"You'll pay for that Diggory," he said softly.

I grinned, "bring it Smithy."

He flung a bowl of -now flat- crackling sherbet at me, which I deflected with my hose while I aimed some Candy Honey Bees at him. The charm on their wings had almost worn off completely, and so they didn't fly very far, but drunkenly hovered towards him and then dropped to the ground.

He leapt onto the table and flung the Flings at me.

I rolled behind the chair Ernie was snoozing in, grabbed a few discarded Berty Bott's Every Flavour Beans and tossed those at him.

He picked up a dish as a shield and shot at me again with the hose, hitting Ernie when I ducked.

"What the-?!"

He zeroed in on Aaron, reached under him for a packet of chocolate Doo-dads, ripped it open and hurled them at him one by one, hitting Zac in the process.

"Mmm, you like it rough baby…?" Zac murmured.

The war ceased.

The three of us shared a look before we opened fire on him.

"AAH! It wasn't me mummy! I swear-!" he screamed like a little girl, jumping up and realising what was happening. We packed up laughing and shared high fives.

He immediately straightened up and opened his mouth to reprimand us.

"That is no way to-" he gurgled as we sprayed him again.

He shook his head and gasped, rubbed the drink from his eyes and tried to look pompous- I mean important.

"Cease and desist fellows!" he said.

_Cease and desist? Who _says _that anymore?_

Aaron raised a brow and ripped his eyes from Zac when he too noticed what little he was wearing.

"Zac, I don't want to know why you are in women's underwear, granted that's as close as you'll ever get to being in a girl's pants, but for the love of all things good and holy GET SOME PROPER CLOTHES ON!"

Other people had begun waking up, and now let out cries of disgust as they saw the terrible sight that was Zac. Some girls giggled uncontrollably, while others made whispered vows to wipe this from their scarred minds the second they knew how. I think I might have to do the same.

Across the room, Justin got up and stretched, still with the crisp packet over his head. Then he looked around, obviously confused by the lack of light and started panicking.

"Guys! I'm blind! I've gone blind! All I can smell is cheese! AAAAH! Too little air! Can't brea-"

By this time I had crossed the room and plucked the packet off his head.

"Oh, good morning Ce- Master Bating," he corrected himself, seeing my shirt.

"It was one of my favourites too," I said sadly. Nessa would kill me when she found out I'd ruined the present she'd got me. What was it with girls and their obsession with clothes? Speaking of Nessa, I should probably write her and say I haven't had any suicidal musings or whatever it is she worries goes on in my head. Sisters; they're like second mothers, only easier to provoke and harder to appease. And they can hit you without feeling remorse.

Justin stared at it for a moment longer; then started laughing.

"I GET it!" he gasped, laughing raucously and clutching his sides.

"Good to know that you don't just store more breakfast bars up there," I muttered to myself.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Ernie give Aaron a low-key high-five.

Sometimes it just didn't pay to have friends like mine.

**Elena**

I heard crinkling sounds… and I smelled chocolate.

Oh that's right, last night Allie and I had challenged Parvati and Lavender to a chocolate eating competition. They had failed miserably, giving up after just half a bar of the Muggle chocolate Allie and I were addicted to.

Allie and I had gone on to eat five bars of extra large Aeros, three Mars bars, and a container of marshmallow fluff. Then we'd been hyper, and the last thing I can remember is sneaking up to the boys' dorms to bedazzle some snarky seventh year's wardrobe.

I smiled to myself, that boy was going to have trouble explaining to his friends why every item of clothing had been labelled with 'Sparkles the Unicorn' in bright pink rhinestones.

That would teach him to try and force us into bed at eight. And then proceed to break up the game of poker Allie and I were winning. Just when George had thrown in a giant box of Pixie Sticks too!

I cracked an eye open just enough to brush the sweet wrappers out of my way, notice that Allie had fallen asleep with some Coffee Shot shells in her hand.

Irony at it's best.

In typical me fashion, I cast my eyes around for a cushion so I could get some more sleep. Finding nothing suitable, I crawled over to Allie and used her thigh as a pillow. I could feel sweet sleep begin to gently mist up the edges of my mind, when my pillow moved.

"Lena, you awake?" whispered Allie.

I 'mmm-ed', still somewhere between consciousness and daydreaming. I needed to find friends who were better pillows. Maybe Ron would be a good candidate…

There was a shrill ringing from some distant place.

"There goes someone's alarm clock," I muttered. Vile things alarm clocks, they just kept ringing and ringing and wouldn't shut up! Until you found the off switch, which was so tiny that it was a rather finicky business to flip it. This meant the only way to silence it was to smash it against a wall. Repeatedly. Then of course you'd have to replace said vile mechanism as it didn't belong to you- because you have more sense than to own such a satanic device.

Speaking of which, I still owed Hermione one… damn.

"What time do you think it is?"

"Dunno, half past six?"

"Uuuugh, I hate mornings…"

"Me too," I mumbled.

There was a pause.

We heard a high pitched yelp, and then laughter.

"Ya reckon that guy with the big fish lip has woken up?" Allie asked, the smirk evident in her voice.

I grinned, "oh yeah."

"High Five," said Allie, and I opened my eyes just enough to do so.

By now the room had gradually filled with whispers and a few sporadic giggles. After a while some people started getting up, and walking upstairs. Within a few minutes there'd be a long queue of girls heading to the bathrooms

"Uuuh, Allie?"

"Yeah?"

"If we don't hurry, we'll have to wait for a shower," I said. I hated waiting in queues, but Allie hated it even more. She was known to hurl abuse at people who did whatever we were waiting for slowly. Allie launched herself off the floor towards the stairs, before jerking backwards and knocking me over.

"What are you doing?" I asked her, taking her offered hand.

She nearly pulled my arm from its socket as she hauled me through the portrait hole at maximum speed.

"If we get there now, we can just summon our stuff!" she said, still pulling me.

I began to run in earnest, "you make an excellent point."

We sped to the nearest bathroom, panting so hard we barely had breath to summon our desired 'uniforms' and toiletries. I idly wondered what people would think when they saw them. Perhaps they'd just think Peeves had some new friends. I wriggled my shoulders- what a disturbing thought. One poltergeist was bad enough at school, anymore and we'd have to call in the Ghost Busters. Although I'm pretty sure that there would be some confounded law that would prevent us from eliminating them. Allie and I knew how to handle poltergeists, but I did so despise them. Besides, how cool would it be to have a real Ghost Buster in our midsts? Although I wondered how they could _see _the ghosts in the first place, seeing a they were Muggles. Maybe they had some kind of magic that we hadn't been able to figure out yet… Ah, the things I think of when in the shower.

"Lena, you know what I'm thinking?" called Allie.

"What?" I asked over the sound of pounding water, trying not to get soap in my mouth.

"RANDOM SING ALONG!"

It was a tricky business to sing loudly in the shower and not get anything in your eyes or mouth. Somehow we managed it though, and I decided that it was just another skill that made us ninjas of awesomeness. We had sung our way through 'Zero to hero', 'Under the sea', and the theme song for Spongebob when there was a strange sound from my shower head. At first I thought it was just the old piping doing something, but then my water began to grow freezing cold.

I swore loudly and skittered backwards to avoid the icy spray, slipping on a bit of shower gel. I landed with a smacking-slapping sound into the opposite shower wall, banging my head.

_Oww. That's going to leave a mark. _

"Lena? You alive?" shouted Allie.

"Yeah, just conked my head."

_Stupid slippery surfaces. _While I was generally as graceful as the ballerina my mother had brought me up to be, that kind of poise didn't extend to wet or slippery surfaces. I'd already learnt that lesson with ice-skating. Cringing at the memory, I ducked my head as the humiliation crashed down on me like it had just happened.

I'd been twelve going on thirteen when my first 'boyfriend' decided it would be a fantastic idea to take me ice-skating. I'd figured that I would be fine, having a certain amount of natural grace, and the rest of the time I'd just hold onto him, like those sweet pictures I'd seen of couples in the snow. How wrong I'd been. The second I touched the ice, I went all wobbly and my limbs were flying everywhere. My boyfriend had only laughed as I fell four consecutive times on various body parts at the edge of the rink. My pride had never fully recovered, and even now the idea of ice in any form but as ice-cubes would bring a feeling of deep apprehension to my stomach. I huffed and rinsed my hands so I could rub away the suds that had slid into my eyes. The sight of a transparent and bespectacled eye greeted me when I opened them.

I screamed and grabbed at the shower curtain to cover myself up, thrashing around and trying to get as far away from whatever was watching me without falling out of the shower.

_Why in the name of Gryffindor's golf club is there a perverted poltergeist or ghost in my shower head?_

"Oh do shut up! The singing was bad but this is worse!" came a strange female voice. I could only describe it as what I would expect a grandmother's voice to be after she's stopped coughing on her gin and tonic.

"Lena, you okay?"

Allie's head poked around me and my make-shift robe to see what was happening, just as a ghost extracted itself from my shower head. It was a girl about our age, perhaps a little younger, in an old-fashioned uniform and glasses.

I couldn't stop screaming though, and Allie had joined me.

After five seconds of high pitched screaming, Allie, regaining her mind, shut her own lips to stop the sound and clamped her hand over my mouth.

"Why must you make such a noise? Don't you know that I live here?" asked the ghost irritably.

"You live in a bathroom?" Allie asked, her voice still high pitched.

"Well it's where I died, so yes. Besides, all the other ghosts say I'm not allowed to float around the castle like them, they say it's because it will upset me to see the place again, but I know the real reason." The ghost floated over to the bench where we'd placed our things, looking down trodden.

"I'm too ugly and no one likes me. Moaning Myrtle they call me, I've been called that since I started at this school when I was still alive."

"Well that's all very well," said Allie, looking slightly sorry for Myrtle. "But why in Merlin's realm where you spying on us in the shower? That's just totally perverted!"

Myrtle rolled her eyes and slumped dramatically, "you see, no one cares about me! All you want to know is why I'm still here, why I still hang around, why I must live in a toilet."

"You live in a _toilet_?" Allie shrieked.

"Oh my God you were in my shower head!" I screamed intelligently, thinking of all the gross stuff that most likely had poured down on me in the water. Now I'd have to take another shower! Could ghosts actually carry germs, or would they just pass through them? Hmm…

Myrtle turned to Allie, "is she always this stupid, or is it just because she's wrapped in a shower curtain?"

I shrieked again as I looked down to realise I was indeed still completely starkers, save for the curtain.

**Cedric**

Having already lost one day of 'hunting', Aaron was raring to go, and had was busy muttering into his toast.

"The question is," he muttered to himself, "how can I ensure only _she _sees it?"

"You know, you could always just ask her out," I said.

"Don't be ridiculous."

I raised a brow. He'd never gotten this worked up over a girl before; well he had, but never in this way. It made me wonder if I'd ever been like this with Cho.

The immediate answer was yes, but then I questioned whether I was just lying to myself. I couldn't even remember why Cho and I had started dating, I could remember the date because she'd drummed it into me, and I could sort of remember our first kiss, it had been somewhere between an awkward silence after a very corny joke, and Cho instructing me on what to do. At the time I'd been relieved not to have embarrassed myself, but then later realised that having your girlfriend tell you how to kiss her for the first time was rather humiliating in itself.

"Hey Lena," called Aaron.

My head whipped up and saw Elena and her friend Alexandra walk into the hall. Elena looked over and gave him a curt nod and a tight smile. Allie looked like she was about to burst out laughing but was just containing it. The girls' skin was pink, like they'd just showered, and Elena's shirt was skew, as if she'd put it on in a hurry. Her brows were puckered and her eyes were a foreboding grey, narrowed slightly as she stalked towards her table.

"Rejected," said Ernie with a laugh.

Aaron scowled, never before had a girl rejected him. Never. Okay there were the girls with boyfriends and one or two Slytherins but they didn't really count.

"She's just grumpy," I said.

"Nah, I just think Smithy is losing his touch," said Ernie.

Aaron calmly threw a bread roll at his head. Justin caught it before it could hit Ernie though and made to butter it, scowling at Aaron all the while. Looked like Justin might be our new Keeper.

"And why is she so obviously grumpy?" asked Aaron.

"Well look at the way she's walking, she's stomping and her bottom lip is about to hit the floor. She's either sulking or grumpy, and by the look of her friend, I'm guessing she's grumpy. She probably embarrassed herself or something."

Aaron nodded and began muttering again. He trusted me explicitly when it came to details. I noticed more than most people, always had. If someone was upset or angry I could tell you in a second, I think it's one of the things that got me in Hufflepuff. It was why I was a good Seeker; I noticed every glimmer of light off the Snitch, every movement the opposition made, and how I got to be captain of the team. It was a fairly daunting thing though, having so many people look up to you, I was always questioning if I was doing the right thing for the team.

Speaking of the team, I had to get ready for try-outs. The pitch needed to be booked and the notices put up. I was suddenly frustrated by my lack of planning; Edward would have never let this happen.

Edward. He was so much better at this than I was, in his sixth year Hufflepuff had put up a fantastic fight against Ravenclaw, and we'd done so well, better than we had in years. He'd had so many plans for the team last year, but with the Tri-wizard Cup meaning Quidditch was cancelled… My jaw snapped tight and I inadvertently bit the inside of my top lip. I traced the ragged flesh with my tongue and tasted the blood.

"Ced, could you stop eating your lip and come back to the conversation please?" asked Aaron impatiently.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry, just thinking about Quidditch. What were you saying?"

"Well firstly, Justin's hand is wandering closer and closer to the last piece of bacon-"

I snatched it up with my fork before Justin had time to blink. I had been deprived of grease for the last week, and I had no intention of letting this opportunity pass by.

"- and I noticed there was no incessant chatter of diets and heels in the background,"

"Yeah, where's Cho?" asked Justin.

I looked around, but found Cho nowhere. I shrugged, it meant that I got to eat what I wanted for breakfast, and that was not an opportunity to be wasted either.

"Justin, pass me the eggs, please? Ernie, I'm going to need that platter of sausages."

"Ceddy-boo!" called a voice from behind me.

"Never mind," I sighed quietly. I turned to plaster a smile on my face and greet my girlfriend. I wondered what had gone so wrong that I now felt apprehensive about seeing Cho. Why did I not feel happy with her anymore?

"Cedric! Is that grease on your lip? Oh Ced I _told _you, we were doing this diet together…"

The rest of her words were lost on me as I tuned out and tried not to wish that Cho would just leave me alone.

**Elena**

"Where were you two? I couldn't find you anywhere!" cried Hermione as Allie and I approached.

"Giving Moaning Myrtle an eye-full," I grumbled hoarsely.

Stupid ghost. Stupid slippery showers, stupid mornings! Godric I hated them. What was the point? Why could I not just catch up on the first two lessons of the day after classes? In fact, I'd just suggest that to McGonagall. It would benefit everyone; I wouldn't have to wake up early, thus no one would feel my wrath because they woke me up too soon, and I'd still get an education. It's really quite a sensible plan.

Allie began explaining between laughs what had happened. Everyone laughed. I scowled and stabbed the sausage on my plate until it looked like a pin cushion.

I became aware that the people around me were staring.

"What?" I snapped. Allie just rolled her eyes and cast her eyes around the table.

"Where's the coffee?" she asked, perplexed by the lack of the magical black substance. I hadn't had coffee since I left home… Home. Crap I needed to write my family letters. That was going to take a while, and then I'd have to walk all the way to the Owlery and get Silver, and then I'd have to walk all the way back.

"Over there with the seventh years," said Hermione.

"Be back in a minute," said Allie.

Why was Allie getting coffee? She didn't even like it that much. She only ate coffee shots because of all the chocolate… Gah! Too much to process at this ungodly hour after too little sleep, too much screaming, and by tomorrow I'd look like a bruised banana because of the stupid slippery shower floor.

There was a _thunk_ as a mug was placed before me. A mug filled with dark liquid, from which steam rose and the scent of Arabica filled my nose.

_Thank you, God, for this coffee I am about to receive. May I continue to have such good friends._

I looked up and saw a smiling Allie, and for the first time since Moaning Myrtle had soured my mood, I smiled back.

"Allie, what would I do without you?"

She pretended to ponder this a moment, "probably behead everyone within a two meter radius with a severing spell and scream at the rest until they ran away."

I nodded at the possibility and drained the mug of its contents; slightly bitter, strong black coffee with a little sugar and cream.

"You know me so well," I smiled at Allie. She grinned back and handed me another mug.

"Just to be sure you don't take a swing at anyone before the third lesson."

I laughed and nodded, feeling the eyes of our friends burning into us. Hermione seemed to be taking mental notes, while Harry and Ron just looked confused before they continued eating. Well, Ron continued eating. Harry was glaring at his porridge.

_What goes through that boy's head? It must be a scary place to be. Imagine what he's been through. Think of what he will have to go through. _I frowned and cast my eyes down to my own plate. Harry was a tragic figure, but not only because of what everyone knew. Something was wrong with him, that much I knew. That much Allie had confirmed last night when we'd seen him thinking in a corner.

_"I know he's Harry Potter and that means he has certain burdens, but why is he always to… frustrated?" Allie said over the loud music._

_I shrugged and felt my mouth drop out of the smile I'd been wearing for most of the day. "It looks like something's warring inside of him. Like it's tearing him up and destroying him from the inside out."_

_Allie nodded, "we'll help him. I don't know how, but we will."_

I wanted to help Harry, but would he see it as being nosy? He'd surely have enough of people trying to get in his head and 'help' him to just further their own benefits.

Movement at the staff table cut off my musings. Dumbledore stood, and of course the hall fell silent in about thirty seconds.

_How exactly does he do that? _I wondered. I mean, it was hard for any other teacher or member of staff to get our attention, let alone hold it. Yet this man managed to capture it within moments and mesmerise us for however long he wanted.

I wished I could be like that, be able to get people to listen to me and have so much respect for me, but that took time. And patience. And I wasn't patient. At all.

I suppose it was just a certain charisma he had, a certain way about him that made it exceptionally difficult to ignore or disobey him. Guess that explained the lack of rebels in the school.

"As you all know, due to the recent departure of Professor Umbridge-"

There was a pause as the hall was filled with happy noise.

"- we are left with a shortage of staff. Luckily we have been able to find someone willing to take the position at such short notice, and she will be arriving next week. Until then though, Defence Against the Dark Arts will be used as a time for your Heads of house to use as they see fit." The headmaster sat down, smiled, and gestured for us to continue.

Allie and I chatted about classes- she was taking most of mine, and what house she might get Sorted into. Dumbledore said that she should come by Professor McGonagall's office tomorrow morning and she'd take her to get Sorted. Allie already knew she would be in Gryffindor- any other possibility was just not acceptable. We had spent most of the day with each together, before we went back up to the common room where McGonagall was waiting for us with a stern face. We were told that we were going to have the time to do homework in.

See, I knew I liked her for a reason. Other teachers might have told us that we needed to do something else- like… go up and clean the Owlery, but Not McGonagall, she had sense. She knew we would soon be up to our ears in homework, so she gave us time to do it. I got halfway through and asked if I could go to the bathroom. The three classes of Pumpkin juice and two mugs of coffee I'd had were catching up with me.

I found my way to the bathrooms with minimal confusion, and was on my way back to Gryffindor Tower when I caught sight of something very strange.

I looked around to make sure no one else was there, before I walked backwards around the corner.

Yup, it was there alright; a biscuit the size of my head, covered in chocolate.

I grinned and took the first step to descend the stairs. Then there was a swooping feeling in my stomach as some invisible force tripped me up, sending me tumbling down the flight of stars towards the biscuit.

I let out a little 'oof' each time I hit the cold hard marble stairs. I was going to have enough bruises to play dot to dot with! But then I landed and didn't roll anymore, so I must have reached the bottom with the biscuit.

_Please don't let me have squashed it!_ I prayed, eyes still screwed up.

Slowly, I opened one eye, peered around, and then heard a great clattering from above me.

I let out a small scream and ducked my head into my arms, going into the foetal position.

_The sky is falling!_

There was a great huff as something landed next to me. I peeped through the gaps in my fingers, once I'd unclenched them.

A pair of piercing wine-coloured eyes looked at me with interest.

I took my hands away from my face and looked back at Aaron with just as much curiosity, if a bit of confusion.

His eyes fell on the biscuit, and my own snapped onto his.

_Back off man, that is MY biscuit._

He fixed me with a determined look.

"Either we wrestle for it, or I take you out for ice-cream," he said seriously.

_Tough call; either I wrestle him and squash the biscuit in the process with my luck, or I get the cookie and ice-cream too. Decisions decisions._

I nodded, "I want two scoops."

He quirked a cheeky grin, "Honey, for you I'd buy three."

I laughed and got up, inspecting the cookie for damage.

"Wait, you're actually going to eat that?" he asked.

"Um, what else do you propose I do with it? Put it in a stroller and take it for a walk around the grounds?"

"Well as long as I get to come along I have no complaints with that."

I rolled my eyes and took a bite.

My world changed forever the second my taste-buds… tasted it.

"Holy Hobgoblins! This is… this is…." I was at a loss for words. It was like a piece of man-made heaven in your mouth.

"That would be a Hobnob," said … bugger what was his name? How can I forget people's names so easily?

"A what?"

"A Hobnob; it's a type of Muggle biscuit."

I nodded and made a noise of understanding in my throat. No way I was going to stop chewing.

Aaron watched me happily devour half the biscuit with an amused expression. What exactly was so funny about me eating the biscuit I'd won?

I quirked an eyebrow. "What? Never seen someone eat a biscuit before?"

"N- no…" he spluttered, past words.

"You _haven't _seen someone eat a biscuit before? Dude, that's weird."

"N-no… I have I just never saw someone enjoy it that much."

I cast him one more weirded-out look and started to edge away from him. Clearly there was something wrong upstairs and I wasn't too keen to hang around a mentally unstable person.

"Where are you going?" he called.

"To McGonagall's classroom for Defence Against the Dark Arts, I have homework to do."

He hurried after me, "Homework my arse, you just wanted to get away with your biscuit."

I looked at my shoes and kept walking.

"May-be…" Then I shot him a grin. "I don't like sharing."

He looked hurt, "not even with people who let you have biscuits?"

I rolled my eyes, "You didn't _let _me have it; we had a deal."

"Which I offered," he said stubbornly.

"Huh? I don't understand."

"Ex_actly_," he said with a smirk.

_Were all boys this odd?_

The answer was immediate; yes. Boys are strange beings that no-one could decipher, womankind had been trying for years without success.

We chatted on our way back as I munched happily on the amazing confection in my hands. We were nearly by the staircase that would lead me to the common room when I heard footsteps and raised voices.

Ron suddenly sped past me with an armful of shiny wrappers, with Allie skidding around the corner after him. Ron had paused before he headed down the stairs to look at me and Aaron.

"Hey Ron, what you doing?" I called, wondering why he was trying to run away with something Allie clearly wanted.

"Lena! Where've you been?" called Allie before he could answer. "Ron's trying to steal all the left over chocolate and where did you get that cookie?"

I took a protective position and cradled the biscuit in my hands.

"Mine," I said sharply.

Allie glared at me and took a step forward. "Lena, sharing is caring."

"But too much sharing is stealing," I quipped.

Allie frowned, "No fair, I taught you that!"

I didn't bother to argue. I was too focused on making sure no one got the precious delight in my hands.

"Lena, would you care to introduce me to your friends?" asked Aaron from besides me. He either wanted to avoid a fight, or genuinely was interested in meeting the crazy people I roomed with.

I nodded towards Allie, "Aaron, this is Allie. Allie, Aaron." I carefully flicked my eyes to the top of the staircase that led down toward the Entrance Hall. "Ron, this is Aaron, Aaron, I'm sure you can figure out who he is," I said, not in the mood to talk while Allie posed a threat to my prize.

Ron nodded to Aaron, "nice to meet you."

"Likewise," said Aaron, who was still looking at me with amusement.

Allie crept towards me, but our eyes never left each other. I was ready to make a break for it within a second, but Allie had other ideas.

"Lena, please can I have some? Please?"

"No, it's mine," I said again. Silly Allie, she knew I wasn't up for sharing food.

Allie frowned, "you sound like one of those seagulls in _Finding Nemo_."

I laughed, "Yep, hey, maybe we can watch it!"

"Yeah!" said Allie right when Aaron said, "You've watched _Finding Nemo_?"

"Well duh, it's one of the best movies ever," said Allie.

"Really, how do you not know these things Aaron?" I asked. No way I was going out with someone who hadn't watched one of my favourite movies. Not even with bribes of ice-cream.

"No I've watched it tons of times, but it's a Muggle movie."

"…And your point is…?" asked Allie.

Aaron smiled, "just that I'm clearly in the presence of the most amazing girls in Hogwarts."

"Damn straight!" said Allie.

While Aaron laughed, Allie turned to me, "I like this one."

"Me too," I laughed, Aaron's loud laugh drawing some pathetically girlish giggles from me. Soon enough Allie, Aaron and I were laughing at nothing in particular in the hallway. It was moments like these that I loved; where there was no particular reason that I was laughing, but I did so anyway.

From behind me, there was a crinkling sound as Ron tried to make a break for it, but Allie stopped

"Ronald Billius Weasley! You get back here with that chocolate this instant!" cried Allie, then charged after Ron, who was still a little thunder struck at having to compete for food with girls.

I watched, laughter echoing in every cell of me, and knew that although there would be dark times ahead for sure, with friends like these, what had I need be afraid of? Certainly not lack of amusement.

**So…**

**What do you think of Allie? I had not responses to this question and I'm dying to find out! **

**Aaron and Lena? Thoughts? Complaints? Confetti?**

**Cho… what do you should happen to her in the next chapter?**

**Zac… amusing stock character or pointless waste of words, let me know!**

**Once again, so unbelievably sorry for being late. I'm working on it! I'll be adding more deleted scenes soon, so please check them out! Most of them had to be cut because they were too long and distracted from the point of the chapter, but they're quite amusing and I'd like your feed-back on them. **

**Review please! **

**Xx**

**Allie and Paula**


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